Where do you sleep when your kid is poorly - practical question

[sellotape12]

Hello, this isn’t a general question about a style of parenting. I’m talking about quite literally what is the bedroom setup on the days that your child is poorly and wants you to stay with them? Do you sleep on their floor? Do you squeeze into their bed? Do you keep a Z-bed or something?

My toddler is still in his cot, but as we are saving up for a big boy bed I’m wondering if I should get one with a trundle mattress in the drawer. I would like to stay with him on the occasions that he’s poorly (because he doesn’t like coming into our bed) However I don’t think I can sleep on the carpet because I have bony hips! Or do you just squeeze into the bed with them?

I keep a mattress under my sons bed and sleep on his floor if he is really poorly - trundle bed sounds a good plan

It’s more normal than what your parents did, thank god

Both mine have double beds so I just got in with them if needed.

My DD was ill with covid a few weeks ago and asked me to sleep with her. She’s 12 and said she felt better when I was near 🤗.

Of course, as soon as she was better I was back to being the most irritating person in the world.

We are the same. Nobody would get any sleep. Have always said my bed is a child, phone, food, and laptop free zone (husband subject to good behaviour haha).

In answer to the question - in their bed. We may give a bit more reassurance than normal (we are VERY strict at bedtime, no arsing about), but would obviously give them the attention they need if unwell.

Is that a model of parenting you want to repeat?

This seems like the easiest and is what we did

We’ve never slept in with the dc but we live in a small 3 bed semi so with the bedroom doors open we can speak to each other from our own beds. I guess it might be different if we had a big master suite or on another floor.

DD1 is asthmatic and before it was under control we had many nights where I felt happier in with her so I could keep an eye on her and be on hand with the inhaler. Equally DD2 was prone to ear infections and when she was running a fever of 40 she liked me to be nearby. I don’t think it’s unusual for an ill child to want a parent with them. DS is autistic and I often have to sleep in with him to calm him.
Anyway to answer the question we’ve had all sorts of sleeping arrangements! Sometimes in with me, sometimes I’ve slept on their floor on a load of duvets (do not recommend!). DS has a double bed so I get in with him there.
I think a trundle bed sounds like a good idea.

If they're that bad I'll sit on the floor next to the bed and read a story until the Calpol kicks in then I leave them alone to get a good sleep. I go in regularly overnight to check on them - I don't sleep deeply when they're ill.

Trundle bed is a good idea. DS6 currently as a high sleeper and it's a nightmare as he goes through phases of needing lot of reassurance at bedtime (I'm putting off going to bed as he's asleep in our bed now and I have to move him to his bed which is a nightmare). If he's ill he would come in our bed, one of us might go and sleep in DD's spare bed - she has single over double bunks. I avoid sharing a bed with DD at all costs as she's the world's worst fidget.

We have a small sofa that unfolds into a bed. It's ideal as we use it for reading stories during the day and then can unfold if needs be at night without being too much of a hassle. I've slept in DS's room when he's had the vomiting bug as we're on a different floor and I didn't want to risk missing him being sick.

You are very lucky that your children have never been that ill. DD used to get febrile convulsions when her temperature spiked. On one occasion her breathing stopped and she was blue lighted to hospital.

I used to bring her into bed with me and DH slept in the spare bed.

She always sleeps in my bed when she's actually poorly.

I stay in my bed!

Mum of 4 here (now grown up) and trundle bed sounds ideal, along with all of the paraphernalia that copes with an ill child (bucket, sucky water bottles, calpol, old towels and spare bedding and change of PJ's, nightlighting). The alternative is (if old enough) they make their way to you shivering, crying, disoriented and potentially puking or they scream the house down waking all involved anyway having had to do some of that on their own, plus you will be listening out anyway, you might as well be next to them.

Toddler DD has a regular single bed, so she comes in with me and DP sleeps in her bed. But it's only happened a couple of times when she's been really really distressed

DD has always been fine in her own room on her own when ill. But she only moved to her own room age 4.5, her bed was in our room before then anyway. We have younger DD still in our room now at age 2.3 so we are always at hand for her, ill or not.

I’ve only spent the night with them when they’ve been in hospital. At home they stay in their own bed but I will check on them more often and leave all the bedroom doors open so I can hear what’s going on (vomiting, coughing, calling out) and get up and help as needed.

When unwell (not just a cough) in my bed, DH somewhere else.

They want to be with me and I wouldn't get much sleep checking / worrying about them. Also if they are going to be sick I wouldn't them to be sick on their own - when they are small they need someone to 'help', hold the bucket / move their hair out of the way / comfort them.

A trundle works just as well though!

Dh used to get evicted, usually voluntarily and they came in with me. Only if needed really for stuff that would involve lots of night waking (like vomit bugs). Mostly they slept in their own bed and we kept doors open and I just checked on them a few times.

Camping mat on the floor.... In our bed didn't really work as nobody got a decent night then...

So yes would recommend a trundle...

I've never slept in with them. If they were ill I'd leave the doors open and would go to them if they were coughing/ vomiting / distressed but otherwise go back to my own bed.

I used to sleep in their bed if they were distressed (easier than them being in my bed because I could get back out) or in their floor if they were ill and I worried about them vomiting or whatever.

But a trundle bed might be useful if you can't sleep on the floor. Inflatable mattresses, which are cheaper and good for sleepovers aren't really practical at short notice.

If they were ill I'd leave the doors open

We leave our bedroom door open anyway, unless we have guests.

When my oldest was a toddler and unwell I used to sleep on the floor in her room rolled up in a duvet. I don't mind floor sleeping though, did it many times after parties in my younger days! She wasn't a good sleeper at the best of times and I didn't want to get her in the habit of co sleeping. She's not needed me in her room overnight since she was about 4 though, just comes through if she wants me so it worked out fine.

Youngest has always liked her own bed and sleeps pretty well even if she's ill so it's never been an issue.

Mine are generally pretty healthy though so it wouldn't be worth having an extra bed/mattress for this.