Exhausted by 10-month old baby

[esgill]

I love her and in many ways it has got easier (I can only assume she had colic for the first 3-4 months as she was so fussy). Now she is happier and more mobile but still such a handful. No matter what we do with day naps, every night bed time takes 1-2 hours. She feeds, she gets up, she cries, we rock her, she screams, eventually she gives up. It’s not that she isn’t tired, she just seems to need to fight sleep every night. She’s generally fine with day naps.

she’s never been one of those babies you put down in the pram and take to cafes to chill/read. She cries a lot less than she used to but still does when she wants something but can’t have it/is tired/bored which is any time the pram stops moving, when she’s on a train or bus. She constantly wants to play and me and my husband feel so burnt out wh
ithout any family help. We have to travel with her a lot this coming year for my work and I am dreading it as everything is a fight. The only ok situation would be if she lived in a soft play. We bedshare as she never went to sleep in the cot. My husband only had 1 hour alone since she was born and it was when my mum came to visit and took the baby out for a pram walk

i breastfeed and get at most 2-3 hours to work before the baby reappears in front of me wanting milk. I haven’t had any days off or rests.

She is crawling and pulling to stand but not walking yet. When will it get easier? Will it get easier? How can we make it easier?

No one?

Aww I can sympathise my kids were hard work at that age especially DD1! She was a cryer and going out felt impossible at times. Does she attend nursery, to give you a little be break? Also anusol is fab for teething, perhaps she has some teeth coming through! X

I had two babies with a high need for stimulation, and I found this a tough age – mine were over the basic sensory toys for little babies, but not really able to do a shape sorter or stacker or the other slightly more complicated toys, so they were both bored and frustrated and needed a lot of entertaining. Plus they wanted to be walking but weren't quite – again, frustration, and wanting lots from me.

It does definitely get easier as their physical capabilities become more in line with their busy little brains. (And, with two, when they can play with each other, but that's a different discussion!)

In terms of making it easier now, if she likes soft play, how about baby obstacle courses? Crawl under a chair, through a big cardboard box (or buy one of those tunnels), over some cushions, etc. Chase a ball through various of the above, or just up and down the hallway. Pull all the cushions off the sofa for slightly larger-scale at home softplay. When mine were just learning to cruise the furniture, the cot was one of the easiest things to cruise – we used to having 'cruising time' when I'd pop them in the cot and chill with a book or on my phone whilst they cruised the cot.

Does she like a bath? If so, a long daytime bath just for fun is good, and obviously you have to be there and watching, but mine used to play more independently there, so at least I got a bit of a mental break. Anything that can safely get wet is a bath toy. We had random kitchen implements, old shampoo bottles, plastic animals, all sorts to keep it interesting. A washing up bowl of water in the garden on a warm day is another option – I sometimes used to put things like thin slices of lemon/orange or ice cube or edible flower petals in to mix it up a bit.

I'd also recommend baby signing – mine both liked the songs, and it definitely helped with communication before they could speak, so reduced frustration!

Does she like getting out and about? Going to groups, running errands?

This was my DD1. She’s 5 and still more needy than other kids!

BUT - she’s also lovely and I wouldn’t change her.

Putting her in nursery and going into the office made my life a million times better. She was fine without BF there. If you can do that any time soon, I would.

I REALLY struggled between 5-12 months. Once she was confidently walking and down to 1 nap a day, it felt like a weight was lifted as it seemed to open up more activities for us. The constantly needing you but being frustrated by it is a terrible combo!

Glad it's not just me. How long was it before your baby could walk? I'm looking forward to this too as at present one of the most frustrating things is when we're walking and she suddenly decides she's had enough of the pram and it's not a good place to crawl. Hopefully when she walks she can just spend some time running about.

I hated this age, you have all my sympathy. And nil points for everyone who told me how much I’d miss this stage once it was gone (clue…I miss it not one tiny bit, my DSs get better and better company as they age!).

It’s ok to find this stage tough. It’s ok to question what to do about it (I went back to work FT with great relief). But it is true that this is just a stage (as everything is) and it will pass. I found being able to talk was a game changer for no longer having frustrated DSs!

Have you thought about finding a childminder for a few hours a week? Or getting a babysitter in so you can go in a date?

m This will pass. I know it’s hard. But at some point it will be a distant memory.

You have my sympathy I had one of those babies. It's a nightmare. I remember there was a heatwave and every one else's babies had set afternoon naps and they got a break at some stage but even after our baby swimming class DD would not nap and needed constantly to be in my arms. We never ever had a routine. I was constantly exhausted. She did speak really early as well. If it's any consolation she stayed really curious and at 11 is academically well above average and loves speech and drama and creative writing and things like that and is a bit of a drama lama and still hates sleep but is actually great fun and great company

Sadly we can't afford nursery. Been using teething gel but blamed teething for months and none yet so I reckon it's probably her personality. She's very sassy!

Thank you, these are brilliant suggests. We'll try and make an obstacle course. Much harder for travels. Holidays and opportunities I should have been very excited about I am currently dreading.

She loves group events, quite enjoys running errands. We did two terms of baby signing. No signs yet but I think now might be the time to learn them. She can wave and clap her hands.

When did your babies start walking? Did that help a lot, then?