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4 replies

Secondtimemum24 · 02/08/2024 17:30

I just need some advice

I have just had a baby with my partner of 4 years this is my 4th baby my others are teenagers and this is my only baby with my new partner.
he is estranged from all his family so this baby is the one thing in life he really wanted and one thing he has apart from me and my kids which he loves as his own and he loves baby so much I can see that like the best thing ever!

now to my problem - I don’t feel like he loves me anymore … we argued lots in pregnancy I was always trying to talking about my feelings and they got shut down everytime but I love him and assumed it’s just my hormones. Fast forward to having baby I do everything … every feed every nappy change every bedtime every bathtume … EVERYTHING. He comes home from work I cook for him, do all the washing etc … occasionally he will tidy around the house once I’ve gone to bed with baby.

i just feel fed up I’ve said how this is making me feel but I’m exaggerating. He said I’m miserable … which I can understand I may look it but the only time I’m miserable is with him.

we haven’t had sex in a year.
don’t really kiss or hug anymore he just doesn’t seem to want me - however he says I’m crazy why is he here if he doesn’t want me … my opinion is he’s only here for baby and my kids ….

i dunno I just feel like I don’t know if I can carry on like this but then if we break up he’s going to want baby a few days a week and then I won’t be with her which makes me sad ….
Help

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 03/08/2024 08:29

How old is baby and are you breast feeding?

RappersNeedChapstick · 03/08/2024 09:18

No court in the land will give him overnights with such a young baby. As the PP said, are you BFing? This is quite relevant when the Court is considering overnights.

Secondtimemum24 · 25/08/2024 14:08

I have a dilemma … my baby is 4 months old I said I’d go back to work when she’s 7 months old … now I’m regretting that… I’m worried if I give up work I won’t have enough money… it’s only me no dad so I’m on universal credits and have 2 other children but they’re older … is anyone or has anyone been in my position?
will my universal credits go up if I leave work? Etc ….
im thinking to go back to work I’ll be paying my wages all to childcare 😩

OP posts:

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PolaroidPrincess · 25/08/2024 14:24

Secondtimemum24 · 25/08/2024 14:08

I have a dilemma … my baby is 4 months old I said I’d go back to work when she’s 7 months old … now I’m regretting that… I’m worried if I give up work I won’t have enough money… it’s only me no dad so I’m on universal credits and have 2 other children but they’re older … is anyone or has anyone been in my position?
will my universal credits go up if I leave work? Etc ….
im thinking to go back to work I’ll be paying my wages all to childcare 😩

Won't you get 80% of the childcare costs through UC? If you don't go back to work, will you have to pay back some if your Maternity Pay?

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