Where do you put your toddler when you get ready?

[Corporatepreggolady]

Hello all,

I work FT and have an 18 month old. Previously, I could plonk her in a high chair while I showered and dressed, but she's becoming too wiggly and busy for that. So where do I put her?!

• She's awake at 5, so I can't really get ready before she's up
• My DH works early shifts, so he's not around
• It takes me about half an hour to get showered and dressed. Work is a professional gig so I do have to be somewhat suited, booted and made up.

Perhaps some people let their toddlers roam around the same room while they get ready, but mine is just magnetised to me and won't really potter or play alone for long.

The only effective solution I've found is in her cot (safely imprisoned) with my phone playing Miss Rachel 🫣😱 but this feels like bad mummy behaviour.

Any ideas greatly appreciated

Miss Rachel saved me from some rough times with my toddler - definitely not bad mummy!

Is their bedroom secure? Do they have a stair gate? I would either put my son down in his crib with some musical books or put him in his room with the stair gate on and let him play with his toys. His room was perfectly safe and secure for his age (and toddler proofed!).

If he was quite upset I would poke my head in every 10 minutes so he knew I was close by and would come back

Travel cot in the bathroom if you have space? The shower is the only really tricky bit I find. I usually get dressed in the living room and DS2 is happier (and safer) pottering there than if I tried anywhere else. I have learned to get dressed very very quickly though. I have a few toys that I hate (including one disco effect thing with a very annoying sound) that I have stashed away in case of emergency which usually distract him.

I started to have my shower in the evening when they’d gone to bed. This cut down my morning routine by a lot so I found that they were happy to “read”/ play with toys/ watch an episode for 10-15 mins in my room while I got ready (dressed/ teeth/ make up).

Just put Miss Rachael on and get dressed - she'll be fine and it isn't bad mummy behaviour.

Always showered in the evening after they were asleep.

And then just don’t take too long to get ready. Honestly, it takes me literally 2 minutes to get dressed in the morning, and that’s it.

During that time, they wander around, play, eat breakfast, etc, which is probably what they would be doing even if we were both home with an extra pair of hands. We have never been ‘entertainers’ - we live life and kids have to fit around that, which I think has meant that it’s possible to do things without them clinging to us all the time.

DC1 is almost 2 and will usually happily roam between their bedroom and whichever room I’m getting ready in, playing with toys and just generally pottering/chatting - I just close any other upstairs doors and stair gate. Recently they have been asking to sit in their cot with a pile of books which is great and keeps them entertained for ages provided I periodically go and refresh the book selection!

Im in the "shut the stair gate" camp. Fitat thing in the morning was the only time we spent upstairs except for sleep routine, so that was the only time toys kept up there were played with, which meant they were a bit novel. However, I also always did (and still do! 7 years and 4DC later....) my make up on the way in to work. I haven't had a full half hour for my morning routine in years!

If screens are what is needed, I wouldn't go for a phone for first choice. Do you have an actual TV? Means they aren't looking at such a short distance and are less likely to be totally immobile. Also means youre less likely to be asked for it when out and about with them.

Honestly stick with cot and Miss Rachel, it's the easiest option! Mine wouldn't be happy with that even so I end up just with about five mins to get ready and shower the night before which isn't ideal!

I have my showers in the evening when he’s asleep. In the mornings when I need to get ready I put nursery rhymes on Alexa and put him in his cot with some toys - he can see me in the bathroom getting ready so he’s usually happy enough.

I’ve been thinking about getting a safety gate for him room door so he can just play in his room while I get ready - he’s 19 months.

Shower in the evening and make sure everything is laid out ready. Whatever prep makes getting ready easier, eyebrow tint, hair treatments etc.
Stairgate and childproof so they can potter.
Not a fun stage!

If that is bad mummy behaviour, we are all guilty. 💐

Using TV as a tool for short bursts is fine.
Switching TV on and having it constant in the background not so fine, I think you are over worrying.

Miss Rachel and pinkfong help massively 🙂

Mornings can be a real juggling act with a toddler. I’ve found that giving them a set of safe toys or a special activity they only get during this time can help. Maybe a sensory bin or an interactive toy could keep her engaged for a bit. If you’re comfortable with it, maybe a screen for a short period might help, just as a last resort. Finding what works for both of you takes trial and error. Good luck!

I think you do whatever works for you

If cot and phone enables you to get ready, then that's what you continue to do

It's not bad parenting

Cot and Rachel is fine. She's safe.

I used to put the plug in the bath with toys, shower (shower over the bath) and then get out and get ready in the bathroom whilst little one splashed about in the bath. Obviously had to get my things into the bathroom beforehand.

(But I don’t think a bit of TV whilst you get ready is bad!)

Safely in the cot with Miss Rachel on screen is fine

We have a stair gate at top of stairs, so she can just roam around upstairs. I leave bathroom door open if I’m in showe

I shower at night and mine would also stuck with me but we listen to his tonies box or songs on Alexa. I had a bag of make up brushes/hairclips I would give to him that he found endlessly fascinating.
When he was too little to take my eyes off for a second( ie crawling) I'd pop him in the cot or playpen with toys and books.

Tv is fine. Don't worry about it! Doesn't make you a bad mummy at all.

I shower before bed so I can just get ready after I've got my toddler ready for the day and then we're good to go. I tend to get ready myself downstairs as it's got the TV, his toys and breakfast foods there to keep him entertained and he just potters about.

If I had to have a shower in the morning then I have absolutely been known to stick Sesame Street on with him in his cot as we currently dont have a stair gate upstairs.

I am clean and well presented and feel better for it, and he is safe while I do so therefore I don't feel an ounce of mum guilt and neither should you!

A cot is far better than a high chair! I apparently nose dived out of one. If you can't watch them then a cot/playoen is fine.

Thank you everyone so much. Very helpful. I'm going to try books and exclusive 'morning toys' instead, but it sounds like I'm not the only one in the Miss Rachel camp. Thank you for making me like a not so bad mummy 🩵

Her room is pretty baby proof but honestly, this stage of toddlerhood is mad - there's a rocking chair she could climb on/dive off, ditto a windowsill. Basically, if she can use anything as a weapon or tool for self destruction, she will.

Props to the people who can get ready in five minutes or shower then night before. I look like I've slept in a hedge when I try either.

Such a fun age!

Her room is pretty baby proof but honestly, this stage of toddlerhood is mad - there's a rocking chair she could climb on/dive off, ditto a windowsill. Basically, if she can use anything as a weapon or tool for self destruction, she will.

This! At this stage, you just do what you need to do to get through.