Just need a bit of a vent and don’t want to be rude about my partner too much to friends and family.
we have a 5 week old. It’s tough. He’s so gorgeous and great in the day and ok at night but in the evenings he’s so so colicky.
today my partner WFH. I took baby to a cafe in the morning, came home and made us lunch. He held baby for about 5-10 mins while I do this. Partner spends some time assembling a new bbq in the afternoon. Still no help with baby.. baby doesn’t sleep much of the day despite my best efforts. Only able to put him in the Moses for 20 mins the whole day. Then becomes very grouchy 4-5 pm. I go upstairs around then to pee. See that partner is having a nap. He wakes and I say I’m taking baby for a walk to try to get him to sleep, that he’s welcome to join. He does not join. Baby does not sleep. Yells a lot. I come home. Partner holds baby for about 5-10 mins again and then has gone off for drinks with the NCT lads. I didn’t say anything but did snap a bit when he was asking if he should get nappies on the way home. I said just come back sooner please, I’ll get nappies tomorrow 😡 (we have plenty)
I needed a bit of a break essentially. Baby now asleep but only on me and I’m just pissed off!!
this is on a background of actually feeling less affection from him since birth of baby. He has said it’s because he’s been focused on the baby but I still feel it even though I think he’s trying harder. If I were him I would have helped a lot more today. I also would have been more loving through this whole thing. I had a hard labour ending in c section with a week stay in hosp after for baby having jaundice. Never got flowers or any kind of gift. He never spontaneously tells me I’m a good mum or that he’s proud of me or that I look great or anything as effusive as I need.
hes also made me feel weird about how involved my family have been - it’s been hard trying to keep them all happy. As well as baby.
he is a kind man just quite one track minded I think. He loves our son so much. He is practical and has helped with lots of things, does all of the beurocrisy in the household. He also does look after baby 9-1/2 am giving him expressed milk which is amazing for my sleep. Though he does sleep a bit during that time I think himself.
I know I’m going to end up saying something because I’m very open and usually do. But any shared experiences before I do I would really appreciate.