5 year old saying hurtful things

[xxxJess123xxx]

Hi all, so I suspect my 5 year old may have some kind of addition needs, maybe ADHD. I have submitted the initial forms and now a huge long wait.

he becomes increasingly violent on school days around bedtime. Hits/kicks/scratches/punches etc. I have done some online/zoom courses on emotional regulation etc it’s still very very tough.
I understand a wait for diagnosis can be very long too.

tonight, after some time at a football/sports day camp today, he said to me at bedtime when I went to give him a kiss, your the worst mum ever. This broke my heart. Why would he say such nasty things. I said, well that’s not a very nice thing to say to Mummy, and he just laughed in my face.

im not sure what the point of this post is, I just can’t sleep and have no one in real life to talk to

sounds horrible, but he probably feels so safe with you that he can take you for granted and knows nothing he says or does is going to stop you loving him, so takes it out on you rather than on anyone else

Children go through a phase of being like this. It’s got nothing to do with your standard of mothering or how much you love him. They come out with all kinds of phrases such as ‘I don’t love you’ or ‘You’re the worst mother ever’.

Believe me, it doesn’t mean that they don’t love you or need you. They’re too young to understand how hurtful they’re being.

The best way to respond is to say, ‘Well, I still love you very much’ or, I’m going to carry on being the best mum I can be because I’m so proud of you’. In other words, you’re showing that you have a strong bond with them and a strong belief in your parenting abilities. They’re a child and you’re responding as an adult.

They soon get tired of this game and forget about it.

Please don’t take this to heart. It’s just a hiccup in their growing up.