Do you have a village?

[wonderings2]

Being nosey....prompted by the school holidays also.

I was speaking to my sister and she mentioned that a friend of hers had "one hell of village around her" - friend has one grandparent that will have DC (4) over night, one night a month and another set of grandparents provide childcare 1 day a week as both parents work full full time (DC is in nursery the rest of the time)

It just got me thinking what is considered "a village" do you get any help with childcare, or anything else connected to having a family? Are you the village? I know some friends who pay their parents to look after DC for example.

DH and I are also quite old parents and we're pretty fit but if DC decide to have children later (or at all) we may well be far too doddery to help 😅

calling it unhelpful is your opinion. I am pointing out what the phrase actually means, and also pointing out that no one is raising children WITHOUT a village

I actually agree with much of @sixtyandsomething 's post.

The question isn't "Do your family do childcare for you?" it is "Do you have a village".
My understanding of the phrase is are you part of a community, or communities. That includes people at Church, people you meet watching your dc's sport and so forth, absolutely. It is about people you can turn to when you need support in one way or another - that might be picking up your dc from school when you get stuck, but it might also mean bringing you round some cake and a listening ear when you need it, or it might mean giving you the name of a babysitter or even a plumber. Your community / village includes someone you can call on to give you a hand when you want to move a piano or a washing machine. Or someone who will feed your pet rabbit when you go away for a few days. It is much, much broader than childcare.
I have several communities, and hope I am part of many people's villages.

It's not what people generally mean though, is it @sixtyandsomething?
Support from extended family and friends and paid for carers is different than a school teacher or GP!
My husband passed away when my kids were 4 and six. My siblings and parents lived abroad and my in laws were not interested. Yes I had friends and teachers. Think that's a completely different 'village' than a family who have aunts and uncles and grandparents as part of their lives on a weekly (if not daily) basis.

We don't but I do have two people who would do everything they can for us including in an emergency but have their own challenges and can't offer regular help.

I'm not entirely sure what is meant by a "village" but I didn't have DC until my 40's, so my parents & in laws are to old/frail to help really. I'm always with DC when we visit as its too much for them, much as they'd otherwise love it. Friends- everyone is too busy living their own lives really. I've offered to help numerous times (if they seem to be struggling/juggling or I'll mention in passing that I'm on leave on x week of school holiday if their DC would like to come over to play with mine for a day or two) but not been taken up on it. In fairness I was raised to never ask for help so I can see why people might be reluctant to ask or accept, I probably wouldn't either. My parents never had help from their parents, nor any of my friends so far as I can recall. I was never left with my parents friends or with neighbours, never had anyone other than my mum pick me up from school so to me this is normal to be honest - from my background its those with regular "help" that are the anomaly (albeit in a nice way!).

But it isn't what the OP was asking. Yes, I have a GP and a HV but I don't have anyone to babysit, to help me out around the house, to watch the kids in an emergency, to do free childcare. So I don't feel that I have a 'village' sadly.