Comments about boundaries and behaviour.

[HettyMeg]

How do you deal with comments from older relatives about boundaries and toddler's behaviour? My mum doesn't like the fact our 2.5 year old will say no to things and says we need to have more boundaries and that our daughter is "too demanding". I've explained we are parenting her in a way that teaches boundaries respectfully but that we're not trying to raise a compliant daughter who just says yes to everything, but who knows her own voice. I was personally taught from a young age that I should not say no to older people, and essentially do as I'm told to please others. And it has left me with self esteem issues as an adult as I have had to try and undo years of people-pleasing.

I agree with you, they need to understand how to judge situations and question, not just comply - tell your older relatives that and if they question you, just say thanks for your opinion but our way stands

Thanks. I have the type of relationship with my mum where if I say something that she perceives as critical of her, even just stating that we're doing it this way, she will either sulk or nod her head but then bring it up weeks later saying I don't "accept any advice". She sees any kind of disagreement as a personal slight. It's become a difficult dymamic to be honest.