2.5 year old fell into pond

[Rollypops]

Hello all,

I'm not sure why I've made this thread tbh, guess I just needed to vent.....

Today my nearly 2.5 year old fell into the pond whilst feeding the ducks. It all happened in a matter of seconds. I had hold of my 8 month old daughter when it happend. As I tried to grab hold of my son I had to put my daughter down quickly meaning that she grazed her head. I grabbed my son out of the knee deep water and he was submerged for 3-4 seconds.

As a mum freaking out I called an ambulance as I wasn't sure if they'd both banged their head or my son had inhaled water, although he wasn't coughing when I pulled him out. Thankfully both are ok after being checked over by the hospital.

The mum guilt from this is awful and I literally feel like I've let both of my children down massively today. I can't stop thinking about the what ifs 😩 I love them both dearly and it kills me to think something worse could have happened.

But nothing did happen because you were right there and pulled him out immediately. Well done, you are absolutely not a bad mum.

Aww be kind to yourself! You did the right thing, and kids are pretty robust. Happens to us all. I remember when baby DS rolled off a bed onto the floor! He was fine, didn't even cry but I felt terrible.

mYou aren’t a bad mum
everyone has these moments

I tend to debrief and review and refine “the process” when things like this happen.

so here I suppose… does your oldest need a harness?
should baby always have/be in a pram if you take them both out or if oldest is not secured?

or is it just a one off? (Prob not because it could just have easily been something else.. his saw a balloon and ran into the road or whatever… but I have a bolter 🤷🏻‍♀️)

I struggle taking my two out solo they are a few months younger.
give yourself some grace, I imagine it’s been a hard day…

Oh give yourself a break, they’re both fine!

I was on a quay a couple of years ago and a young child fell in, it was far deeper than knee deep. A stranger jumped in and rescued him and both child and stranger were fine.

I can’t begin to list the accidents my kids have had, not once did SS ever call us, AND they all managed to make it to adulthood with all four limbs intact.

You HAVE to let go of the guilt, to keep it leads to madness and won’t make you a better parent, it will make you stressed and more likely to make a mistake.

Have a glass of wine and a giggle about it and NEVER think about what might have happened if it was deeper/I was further away etc

Nope, you aren't a bad mum. You made the correct quick decision in a crisis. Your instinct was correct to prioritise the child who was in the water even if it meant unceremoniously dumping the baby on the ground.

Pretty much every parent will have a moment like this where something with the potential to be a disaster happens but is rectified quickly.

Sounds like you're more scarred by the experience than they are!
I'm sure you'll be fine, if that's the biggest scare you've had.
One thing I would say is be prepared for and expect a routine call from the under 5s heath visiting team, as they get notified about all hospital urgent visits and they have no idea what the situation was.
We had a call when my child was admitted from an illness before he was even discharged, and they clearly had no idea they just had a list of names to call.
So don't let it rattle you too much if/when it happens.

Great post.

Of course you aren't a bad Mum.
Stuff happens. None of us are perfect.
But, it is good advice to think how you can prevent it (or similar situation) happening again, so these are great suggestions.

You saved your son. That was literally all I wanted out of this thread! Well done and hope you get a bit of a break tonight x

You’re not a bad mum. I bet you’re more upset than them - your son probably thought the ambulance was great fun!

My dad once dropped baby me into a swimming pool while sitting at the edge bouncing me. Even worse, he froze, and a Swedish man had to dive down to get me!! I was fine.

My son fell into a river when he was about 10 - an absolutely raging river that happens to feature on a popular TV show and my heart stops every time I see it, in person or on the telly. My other son fell out of a sling and hit his head (he sort of slid out of the bottom of it) at about eight months old and I go down long, panicked thoughts about him having some sort of injury to his head we don't know about but will 'get him' at some point in the future.

What I'm trying to say, is these thoughts are awful but totally normal. Sounds to me like you did exactly what you needed to do and got both of your kids safely on dry land as quickly as possible. You've nothing to feel bad about and the 'hebegebies' when remembering such events are awful but normal.

I bet every dm on here has had a parenting what if moment... My ds went down 5 steps in a buggy at about 6 months old. I also saved dd from going down stairs aided by her siblings in a stacker box..

It was an accident. Accidents happen to even the most careful of people.

You were all out doing something nice.
It went wrong for a second and your son accidentally fell in the pond.

You took immediate action and managed to keep both of your children safe in a difficult situation.

You'll replay it in your head over and over. However, it's a good mum that is right there taking the necessary action, not a bad mum.

Get some reins so you have a hold on both. I once whacked DT1s head off a doorframe rocking her to sleep but trying to watch dt2 at the same time. Not my finest moment. We all fuck up. I'd be extra vigilant by water though.

My DS fell into our garden pond at about that age. He was out in the garden with DH who had taken the cover off the pond for some reason. They looked into the water together at the fish etc. Then DH turned his back for half a second, heard a splash and turned round in time to see DS falling in. DH got a wellie full of water pulling him out. He went under momentarily but was absolutely fine although not very happy about it! (He is now 38).

You did the right thing OP. You might find completing a paediatric CPR/first aid course helpful- not that I'd wish that scenario to ever happen again, but its a life saving, useful life skill everyone should have.

Shit happens. The important thing was you were there to supervise and help them. I watched my baby fall off the couch and break his collar bone. I actually dislocated my DD’s arm by picking her up when we were playing. You’ve not caused your children’s injuries. I hope this experience doesn’t stop you from letting them learn or grow. I can get why you felt like you did, but it was a bit ott phoning the emergency services as one child got a little dunk and the other got a graze

Mistakes happen, and you were right there so nothing terrible happened. I almost lost my DC last week and felt ill, but I actually think these things are a good reminder not to get too complacent.