What the hell happened to my sweet toddler?

[Helena1993]

Over night my cute, cuddly 26 month old toddler who was always nice and did what I told him turned into a „no“ monster. When I wake him up in the morning the first thing I hear is „no“ 20 times. Even when I don’t ask for anything. „we’re going to eat now“ no!
„put on your shoes“
no!
“we need to go now“
no!!!!
He fights me like a little demon. This happened the same moment he learned to speak in 3 word sentences. His language exploded and now he’s talking so much and maybe that has something to do with it?
But seriously, how long is this going to last? I miss the kisses and the hugs and the love.

He constantly has tantrums over the dumbest shit. There is so much whining that I hardly get any down time while at home. I’m exhausted. Will this get better? Helpp :((( I already have an anxiety disorder and this stress is just too much for me

Years, sorry.

I find that giving a choice of two things can sometimes help. So for example, do you want your blue shoes or your red shoes (present both to them). They may try the no shoes option which has not been presented to them, but hold your ground and repeat the choice.

Be prepared that it will now take a lot longer to do anything, especially getting them out of the house.

It's normal. He's learning he has agency for the first time ever. You might not be asking him but you are telling him to do things and he wants to try out his newly found agency.

I tend to take this approach instead:

"I'm going to the park yay!!!" While heading for the door with bag already packed and his shoes in my hand. He comes running, "me too I want to go to the park!" I say "hooray!! Let's get your shoes on so we can go!"

If I said "we're going now, get your shoes on" he'll say "I don't want to!!"

🤷🏻‍♀️

Some fun and enthusiasm about everything helps. It's an invitation to him to come and enjoy the fun, rather than me dictating to him what he has to do.

It works for anything if you act mad excited about it and run for the door:

"I'm going to the shop and I'm going to pick a magazine to read! Yaaay!!" "I want a numberblocks magazine too!!" (He looks at the magazine in the trolley while I get shopping)

"I'm going to see the doctor and then I'm going swimming! Yippeeee!" "Me too I'm coming!!" (I get my doctors appointment and he knows swimming is coming next)

Sometimes I say "hooray I'm going out now and <insert name of favourite toy> is coming with me! Yay! We're excited to go out!"

It’s a bit better now but holy fk.