Regulating emotions as a parent

[Welshlash23]

Hi!

I am a Mum of 2 children (3.5years and 9 months). I am so triggered by the combination of whining and balancing of 2 children that I sometimes just end up shouting, mainly at my eldest 😢 I hate it. I always apologise and say I'm trying to do better. Take deep breaths. But when I have a baby who's needed then my eldest is whinging for attention downstairs it's all too much. It's not aggression or anger as such I guess it's venting but it's really not the way to demonstrate how to react... I don't want to be that mum I just can't help it.

Is it normal to feel like this?

Its definitely worse when having to be somewhere at a set time... i always allow for time to avoid that sort of stress. Im so scared of damaging my eldest 😢😢😢 shes my world.

I am looking maybe for therapy or some sort of mindfulness practice but again, time!? Any tips or advice. Online I know it's not ok to shout. Believe me I don't want to do this, I'm not a horrible mother.

I want to learn how to manage my emotions better and model the right way to be. I think I revert to how my parents reacted which makes me feel worse.

Thanks in advance!!

I'm not diagnosing you but you may be suffering from pnd. You need to speak to your health visitor urgently to get some support.
It is hard but although it may feel normal to shout at a young child when you are stressed it's not the best thing to do. You are starting a cycle for the child as well as you. It doesn't make you a bad person. You need some support.

Thank you! I will speak to the health visitors, avoiding doctor route!! I don't feel depressed, more overwhelm. I need to fix this so I will explore. Thanks so much

I didn't mean to insinuate that you are depressed I think pnd is an old fashioned term covering a whole host of feelings. When I first suffered from it 35 years ago I found my HV fabulous and I think they have more ways of helping bow. Hormones can do all sorts to us and tiredness and lack of support.im not judging you in any way hope you don't feel like that. Sometimes it's hard when you have always had high standards to be a bit overwhelmed when things feel a bit out of control. Sometimes just talking about it helps.