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It feels like my daughter is scared of her baby sibling

1 reply

Purtyburty · 15/07/2024 20:48

Hi - looking for any reassurance/support/advice/solidarity! I have a DD1 who is nearly 3 and a half and a 3 week old baby. We tried to prepare our eldest for a sibling as best we could and she was very excited to have a baby sister on the way. DD has always been extremely sensitive in many ways. One of the ways being noise. For example if somebody mows the lawn in a neighbouring garden and we are playing outside she will ask to go inside. Anyway she cannot bear to be in the same room as her baby sister because she doesn't like it when she cries. The baby can be quite loud when she cries. At first our eldest would well up with tears when the baby cried but it has gotten to the point where our eldest jumps out of her skin at every noise baby sister makes, even if it isn't crying and just general baby noise of grunting and squirming and even hitting herself. DD1 also gets extremely emotional at being in the car with her sibling and is so upset when we all go somewhere together. Is this normal/phase?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Whatisityoucantface · 15/07/2024 21:42

Having a new noisy baby in the house is a big deal when you’re 3 and a half! Are the noises the root cause of the issue, or is it the change that has happened do you think? You say she is very sensitive, her whole world has changed overnight.
The baby won’t stop crying, and will need to be in the car so you will need to acknowledge your daughter’s feelings and get her feeling confident. Can she take a favourite teddy in the car with her or a book to distract her? Can you show her videos of older siblings with crying babies, or books about being a big sister? Can you talk to her about how she can help calm baby down - get a nappy, pass a muslin, sing a song etc. Keep calm yourself when the baby cries, to show that isn’t not something to be afraid of and tell her it’s just the way babies communicate because they can’t talk.
This will all pass, but best to talk and reassure your daughter and gently encourage her to bond with baby. It’ll get there.
Good luck! Congratulations on your new baby

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