Playdate invite-backs

[OverAnxious727]

Do some people just not have school friends over for playdates or is it because it's my DD(9)?
She doesn't have loads of playdates as both DH and I work full time and she has lots of hobbies including at the weekend but has a handful of friends who she will have over- maybe once a month not always the same friend.
Most of them will invite her back and we end up taking turns-ish.
There are however 2 friends we have had each over probably 2-3 times in the past 3 years since Covid and she has never been invited back (but has been to some of their birthday parties, although wasn't invited to one of their parties this year)
One of the dads has said every time "oh we will have you over sometime" and she has then never been invited.
They're still friends at school and I don't mind inviting them without reciprocation but wondered if it was normal or if they might not want my DD over for whatever reason.

I wouldn't take it personally....if she has a few people to have playdates with thats good. Some parents find playdates hard or are very busy, have playdates with non school friends etc. If she wants playdates with them just have them to yours and don't worry about them not having her to theirs. There could be an endless number of reasons that they aren't having her over. They are prob feeling guilty about it!

These threads come up so regularly.
Maybe the other parent is anxious. Maybe they have a big dog. Maybe the house is stinking. Maybe they can't cope with the c they already have. Maybe they are selfish. Could be any number of reasons.

I think 2-3 times in 3 years isn’t really a close friend. It sounds like you’ve made the offer and they took you up on it, but for whatever reason, they aren’t really spending much time together. My dc of the same ish age has friends we’ve never had over for a playdate. They are perfectly lovely, but it’s just not happened. Her really close friends come over maybe once a week at least and vice versa. When we don’t invite people over it’s simply because we already have people around lots because we have neighbours who come to play. They live right there so are always just back and forth. I don’t need the whole class over frankly. 😂

It also could very likely simply be they’re busy. You say you work full time so I assume these play dates would be on the weekend? I don’t really organise anything with friends on the weekends, except for birthday parties or the occasional sleepover. Weekends we’re busy, so everything is like 3:30-6:30 after school. If they feel that wouldn’t work for you, maybe they just haven’t asked. Definitely the parents I don’t organise much with are the ones I perceive to have complicated schedules.