Can't shake feeling that the other school is a better fit

[Dumbledorkus]

I posted this in the education section but haven't had an by responses, so trying here too!

I'm just wondering if anyone else has ever felt this way. I can't quite explain why I feel this.

So DS (5) is coming to the end of his reception year at a lovely little state school. It's a one-form entry school, 30 kids in his class, 20min walk away. When we chose the school it was between this one and a non-selective private school (5min walk away). We opted for state, because we felt more children would be a better option for friendships, and it would be easier to move him private if we needed to rather than the other way round.

He's had a great reception year, and seems perfectly happy. He's not the most confident kid though, he's very shy and I worry about him being left out and left behind. Despite there not being any issues at all, I find myself constantly looking at the Facebook site for the other school to see what the kids are up to, all the trips they're going on and the all-year-round forest school they do. I can't shake the feeling that this is exactly the right setting for him to thrive, because it's such a nurturing school with 14 kids in the class. I find he's much more confident with fewer people around and really comes out of his shell, otherwise he gets quite overwhelmed and he hates loud noises.

By the way it's not that I think private schooling is the answer, just this particular school, because it has such a lovely nurturing feeling to it that I think would really suit his character.

Has anyone felt like this and taken action? I feel like it would be foolish to move a child that isn't unhappy, but I just can't shake the feeling!

Thanks for reading

Do you know what the balance of boys to girls it is in the class? DD was in a class with 10 other girls and it was hard to find another girl that she really clicked with until she went to secondary. She did have friends but it wasn't always easy.

@RappersNeedChapstick I got it wrong there's only 10 kids in the class (this may change for Y1), but it's an even split between boys and girls

In his current class of 30, there are 11 other boys

If money isn't the problem, I would send him to the private school along as the class sizes get bigger through out the years

Thanks @Mummyboy1. Luckily we're in a position where the fees aren't a problem, but I'm unsure how the class sizes will change through the years. Typically they do increase in size, up to a max of 18 children I think. I just feel particularly nervous about taking any action when he isn't unhappy at his current setting! Whilst he could thrive there like I think, I might be wrong and end up moving him to his detriment, with only myself to blame 😔

Don't forget - independent schools will usually have a whole marketing team making those lovely shiny social media posts.

I'm sure the independent school is lovely, but it sounds like your son is having a great time where he is.

Honestly a tiny class like this would be reason enough to move a child out of the school, let alone move your child into the school. 10 is too small.

Sure it's great when they're 4, but it can cause lots of problems as children progress through school. I would stay with the current school, he's settled and happy there. Plus a bigger class means more option for friends, sport, extra curricular clubs etc.

I agree with @Whinge. A class of 10 is really small and I'd even question whether the independent school is viable, financially.

I would leave your DS where he is happy and settled, and realise that you're fortunate to be in the position of being able to move him to the independent if a problem arises at his current school.

Otherwise, try not to think that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. There might be social problems in the small class at the independent school, or a very dominant child (with influential parents) causing issues. It may not be anything like as idyllic as it seems.