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Parenting

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Original poster

Is this normal behaviour from my ds

8 replies

zez · 10/04/2008 19:52

Hi
My ds goes through these crazy moments were he just wants to cling to me its not all of the time but occasionally.
He makes these silly little noises and keeps trying to hug me, and tries to hold onto me saying he wants a hug.
Now I know there is nothing wrong with a hug for your ds but he really hangs all over me and clings round my neck.
And then I feel myself getting agitated as I feel claustiphobic when he does it.
He also has this terrible habit of playing with my hair at the same time.
I will try to move away and say your squeezing me too hard, and then he puts his arms out to me making daft noises wanting me to sit back down by him.
Otherwise he is perfectly okay weel adjusted at school with plenty of friends etc.
It almost seems like a bit of baby behaviour to me.
He is 7 so not a really young one.

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colacubes · 11/04/2008 00:08

Just stop everything and give him what he needs, and he may not feel the need to half lynch you, hard to figure out little ones, he may just get an insecure moment if he has a scary thought and need you for that minute to make it better. hold him tight, big bear hug, tell him you love him, if theres anything thats bothering him tell him he can talk to mummy about it, reassure him, make it his 3 minutes, and he'll be happy, only a minute or so out of your day.

LilyMunster · 11/04/2008 00:11

hes clinging more because he feels you push away. your reaction makes him more insecure.

think about making a regular slot of time, weekly, when you'll go out and do something all about him, just the two of you. will pay dividends in just a few weeks, trust me.

SmugColditz · 11/04/2008 00:50

It's because you move away, it makes him need you more.

grab him sometimes when he is not expecting it, and cuddle him, and stroke his hair and sit him on your lap, and baby him.

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amytheearwaxbanisher · 11/04/2008 00:59

stop pushing the poor boy awy he just needs love and security if you give that to him he wont be so clingy

controlfreakyagain · 11/04/2008 01:02

.. 7 is still quite little imo.... he'll be a great hulking teenager in the not too distant, make the most of the cuddles.

chunkychips · 11/04/2008 01:21

You do sound irritated by his behaviour and I wonder why it's such a problem 'silly noises' and 'terrible habit' and you try to push him away. He's only 7 and there will be loads of times when he feels insecure. My ds is very sensitive and emotional, he's a bit younger, but can't see him changing any time soon. Sometimes he tries to hide it and looks even more vulnerable. Give him lots of support and he will become more confident.

scaryteacher · 11/04/2008 02:18

My DS is 12 and sadly growing out of needing hugs and being clingy. Your DS is torn between the growing up bit and the being a baby bit, and this goes on (according to the books) until they are about 15-16. Give him the hugs...we all need a hug a day for security; I still do at 42.

As for the noises...ds has a little grunt he makes at regular intervals. It's his happy/absorbed noise, and I like to hear it, as I know he's OK when he makes it.

He won't be young for long, so get all the hugs you can, as they won't be on offer for much longer.

mumeeee · 15/04/2008 23:25

He is 7 and not to old for hugs and cudles. so just give him what he wants,

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