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Original poster

What's your view on toy guns?

56 replies

kneedeepinthedirtylaundry · 10/04/2008 16:10

My 3 year old DS loves them, much to our dismay! He pretends things are guns in play, and loves going to a friend's house where they play with the friend's toy guns.

He also loves pirates and I found a cheap pirate's gun in Woolies today for 99p and, inspired by the entertaining vision of him and said mate running around screaming exuberently "peow peow" at each other, I bought it. Haven't given it to him yet, and my DP thinks I'm mad and doesn't want me to.

However, can't deny that DS is interested in and curious about them (despite DP saying "guns are horrible. I don't like them!" DS just says "Well, I like them!").

I kind of feel he may as well outgrow them as a toy (as me and many of my peers did in the 70s), rather than deny him something he's interested in, so his intetrest becomes covert.

I mean, where does it stop? Stop him from wearing a pirtate's outfit cos they are sword-weilding bandits?

Liberal confusion! Please help.

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MummyDoIt · 10/04/2008 16:16

I was like your DP before I had two boys. I thought toy guns were horrible and was determined that my boys would never have one. Unfortunately, they were more determined than I was and made them out of sticks, Lego, anything they could get their hands on. Then a well-meaning relative won one on a stall at a fair and gave it to DS1 in my absence. He was so pleased with it, I didn't have the heart to take it away. To be honest, the behaviour I had hoped to avoid was all there anyway - the stance, the yelling 'pow pow', the threats of 'I'm gonna kill you' so there seemed little point in continuing to ban the toy itself. As for where he'd picked that behaviour up from, it can only have been his peers as he certainly never saw anything at home that could have influenced him.

LilyMunster · 10/04/2008 16:18

i dont like em. but i think theyre kind of inevitable.
my mum never gave us gender specific stuff at all... no dolls for the girls or guns for the boys... my little bro however had a bit of a 'thing' for war and guns and amassed quite an arsenal anyway... so his interest was there whether ot not they were given to him.
his phase lasted about 10 years mind, so dont expect it to blow over all that quickly!

somebody on here will come on and say something clever about learning confilct resolution or role playing being good fro developing emotional responses to stuff safe from real harm in context of play or something... will prob sound quite convincing im sure.

in any event, ive decided to chill about them. i dont like it, and i tell em not to point them at me, ta v much when im grumpy or tired, but i join in now and then, coz its fun playing with kids and fake dying in dramatic fashion. they seem to like it when i fall over.

phlossie · 10/04/2008 16:19

My ds shocked my pacifist Quaker parents who'd had two girls before he came along. He'd make 'guns' out of anything - sticks, kitchen utensils, bananas... I do remember they brought him a toy pistol and sheriff's badge back from a trip to Seatlle, so they must have relented at some point. He's now a complete pacifist leftie who's never even been in a fight. The toy gun languished in the bottom of the toy box as soon as the next thing came along. He also had a spud gun at some point (really annoying).
Ask your dp this: would he stop your ds from having a water pistol? Same difference, really. I say let him have it and don't make a big deal out of it.

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LilyMunster · 10/04/2008 16:22

good point: the warmongering little bro is now v lefty pacifist type. ok, so hes a lazy arse stoner too, but im sure thats by the by

phlossie · 10/04/2008 16:22

...and then there's Warhammer, quaser, paintballing, wiii, Playstation, arcade games... You can't stop him from ever getting involved in a shoot 'em up...

Original poster
kneedeepinthedirtylaundry · 10/04/2008 16:23

Thanks all. Will link DP to this thread. More views welcome.

OP posts:
Monkeybird · 10/04/2008 16:23

hate em; can't avoid em

SoupKitchen · 10/04/2008 16:23

my brother was never allowed them and used to pretend with anything he could lay his hands on especially bananas iirc.

with ds i have no objections, not my ideal toy but it is just a toy

Original poster
kneedeepinthedirtylaundry · 10/04/2008 16:24

I shuder at the thought of evil warmongering playstation games.

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LilyMunster · 10/04/2008 16:25

oh youll get used to it

Monkeybird · 10/04/2008 16:26

kneedeep, the kids never get a look in at our house cos me and the DH are always busy splatting each other

3littlefrogs · 10/04/2008 16:27

They make them out of sticks, duplo, lego, bananas - anything really. They love spud guns and water pistols. They also make peashooters, catapults, bows and arrows, giant catapults - the list is endless. None of this means that they go on to turn into hoodlums who go out onto the streets with knives and guns intent on stabbing and shooting people. The reasons for that are quite different.

witchandchips · 10/04/2008 16:27

I think of them a bit like poo jokes. I don't encourage it and when asked if I will play `killers' with ds say something on the lines of "Mummys don't play killers" just as i say that grown ups don't find things like poo poo head funny (first major lie have told him )

Original poster
kneedeepinthedirtylaundry · 10/04/2008 16:28

groan... do I HAVE to get used to it?

OP posts:
LilyMunster · 10/04/2008 16:28

oh, poo jokes i encourage.
whats not funny about poo??

LilyMunster · 10/04/2008 16:29

yup!

NYC6723 · 10/04/2008 16:32

totally forbidden for ds who is 3.5

Original poster
kneedeepinthedirtylaundry · 10/04/2008 16:32

"None of this means that they go on to turn into hoodlums who go out onto the streets with knives and guns intent on stabbing and shooting people. The reasons for that are quite different."

I agree, DP thinks it normalises guns to play with them (although he did, and he's not in a gang).

(now on floor laughing at bespectacled, polite, apron-wearing DP in a gun-toting gang! Gin)

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Original poster
kneedeepinthedirtylaundry · 10/04/2008 16:33

NYC - why? Will you let him when he's older?

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Original poster
kneedeepinthedirtylaundry · 10/04/2008 16:34

oops, should have been a grin, not a gin, which is what I would like.

Should be working, but am scoffing Celebrations and mumsnetting!

OP posts:
NotABanana · 10/04/2008 16:35

Hate them.

Would never buy the kids a toy gun.

It is inate though to play fight and I find they just make stuff out of Duplo.

Ds1 knows I don't like them, knows he would never get one, but I just don't make a big deal of it if he uses something else and pretends to shoot anyone (which I can actually only remember him doing about twice.)

witchandchips · 10/04/2008 16:35

yes but not all adults do. AND poo poo jokes ARE much funnier when there is a bit of taboo attached to them

beaniesteve · 10/04/2008 16:36

Question - do your daughters love them as much as your sons?

LilyMunster · 10/04/2008 16:36

mind you, if NYC is an indication of where you live... well if i lived in a place where guns were normal and people shoot each other left right and centre (the US), i might be more hardball about it too tbh. id certainly talk about it more (tho i am dubious that banning them can help in any way to dissuade interest)

MissPaulaYates · 10/04/2008 16:37

i hate guns

would never buy them

have four boys

do have tiny things from playmobil but i shudder at them

you will hear lots of folk on here saying - ' give him it why not'

i disagree

dont want my children to play at being killers - end of