Toys toys toys!

[triggersnappy]

New mum friend is extremely minimalist with the toys her son has. I thought I was minimalist too until I went to their house for the first time. Our children are both just about to turn 3.

Her child has:
Toy kitchen with food etc
Large box of brio tracks and trains
Few puzzles
Few soft toys
Small box of various vehicles
A toy telephone
Ball drop toy
Ball to kick around the garden
Scooter
About 10 books

My child has:
Toy kitchen with food etc
Large box of brio tracks and trains
Large box of duplo
Large box of magnet tiles
Basket of puzzles
Basket of soft toys
Basket of musical instruments
Basket of wooden blocks
Collection of numberblocks figurines
Toy garage and small basket of matchbox cars
Small box of "real" things (old push button mobile phone, old camera, calculator, rotary dial phone, set of keys, keyboard etc)
Toy barn with animals, tractor etc
Doll's house with furniture and people
Basket trolley
Sand/water table
Little treasure box that he keeps things he finds in
Mini yoto player
Torch
Selection of colouring books and pencils
Balance bike
Garden- swing, mud kitchen, various trucks and diggers
Lots of books, maybe about 100

I'd say 90% of what we've bought over the years has been purchased second hand. We also do toy rotation so not all of these toys are out at once- my son's head and mine would explode! After seeing my friend's house I'm torn between thinking her son doesn't have enough and thinking we need a major clear out as we've too much stuff.

I feel we need a variety, especially of open-ended toys, otherwise I would get bored, more than my son. It's easier for me to get down with him and play if theres a good rotation of things to build and create with. He'd be happy playing with two cars but my brain would turn to mush!

Where do you stand on toys? Do you go crazy and have lots of toys for your kids to play with, or do you prefer to keep things really minimal? I honestly enjoy getting toys for him (extra thrill if they're a second hand bargain!) but thinking we've maybe gone overboard before he's even 3 years old.

Just wondering if your new friend is also rotating toys which would mean that she has more tucked away that you didn't see? Also, if a child is at nursery full time they may not need so many toys at home.

Children in my family tend to have a lot of books in their bedrooms so perhaps your friends DS had more books than you saw on your visit?

I wouldn't call your list minimalist at all!

Definitely weren't any more toys. His bedroom only had his bed and a few soft toys. Beautifully decorated but no toys there. They don't do a rotation, everything he had was out. Gorgeous home and happy boy.

My son's room is the same because it's tiny, so only one basket of soft toys and his bookshelf. But he's got a lot elsewhere.

They both go to nursery the same amount- 3 days a week.

We have a lot of toys. I do rotate them. We have a lot because I don’t want to be spending a fortune on days out constantly and I like to keep them busy at home. Most of ours are second hand as well

This is what I'm seeing now 😬 it's certainly crept up on us!

Our house looks very minimal on the surface because he doesn't have much out at once due to toy rotation. He has one low ikea unit that we put a few toys in at a time and his flisat table is always out and has different things in it at different times.

I try to keep everything under control by only allowing one box or basket of a certain toy and no more. So if it can't fit in the basket we don't add it to his collection. Everything seems well loved and played with to be fair and wouldn't keep anything that he wasn't genuinely engaging with.

Both are fine.

Do what suits your home, your lifestyle and your budget.

Don't start questioning your choices because you've seen someone do something different to you; that way madness lies.

Am I losing my mind or did I read this exact thread a few weeks ago?? Or maybe the other way around? 🤯

Both of these lists are fine.

Your friends list isn’t Spartan by any means.

Your list isn’t a million miles of from how I’d describe my daughters room.

i am a regular declutterer who is mildly indulgent. We have good storage and it’s not overwhelming but our house is not minimalist

Didn't see that one. You mean someone worrying they didn't have enough toys for their child?

@triggersnappy I mean someone posting a bullet pointed list of what their child has against a bullet pointed list of what another child has.

i am a regular declutterer who is mildly indulgent

Ok this is a better description of me than minimalist 😅 or maybe "surface minimalist"

Another over-thinker clearly 😬

I have a vivid memory and still remember every single one of my toys as a child. I treasured them all and I suppose I'm looking to recreate that for my son without spoiling the pants off him and filling our house with too many toys.

I would like to have a lot less toys than we have but DH is a pain and says “they’re a child, they need toys”. We don’t need this many toys. He suggest a toy rotation. I don’t do a rotation, because it would be me that would end up doing it and I can’t be arsed. So basically I have sorted the storage solutions for the toys and as long as it fits in those storage solutions, it’s fine. For birthday later this year and Christmas I will need to get rid of some things and make sure family stick to it and I’m going to be blunt and say if it doesn’t fit in the storage solution, it’s going straight to the charity shop.

Books are currently in the living room but I will be getting a bookshelf and moving them to their room. Once the bookshelf is full, some books will need to get donated. A storage solution for tonies. The toy storage has everything but paint and play dough, everything fits in/on it except two big items - play cot and kitchen but all food bits fit in the storage unit. We have a basket for stuffed toys.

I'm always massively impressed that anyone actually manages to rotate toys with a child over 2 - my toddler DS has an astonishingly good memory for all sorts of crap and is always going 'where's my x, y, or z?' If it's any consolation, all of his friends except maybe one or two live in houses absolutely overflowing with toys. He also embarrassed me at the one minimalist friend's house by saying to his mum 'shall we get something else out?' when she'd already presented them with the full complement of garden toys!

One thing I will never worry about though is the amount of books - I think 10 books for a 3-year-old would be massively disappointing (as well as boring for the parent if the child wants them read over and over again). They don't take up much space and can be passed on when outgrown.

I found it! Clearly not the same and the scenario the other way round but similar even down the the children's ages

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/amiibeingunreasonable/5075997-my-29-year-old-doesnt-have-enough-toys

This is what happened to us! 😬 He asked to go upstairs to his friend's bedroom clearly thinking there would be some more. He was happy with the brio and the car selection so it wasn't a problem.

With the toy rotation the absolute favourites are never put away. The box of brio is always out and we don't rotate beloved soft toys. But he has recently started asking for specific toys to come out. I just bring them out if he asks for the day and then they go away at bedtime. The house isn't big so we'd be breaking our necks if stuff was left out. Books I agree with definitely.

A single puzzle and 3 dinosaurs? 😧 genuinely baffled at the posters on that thread saying that list is enough.

I wouldn't cope with the lack of open-ended toys. Honestly brio and magnet tiles save my sanity when he wants me to play with him. What on earth can you do with one solitary jigsaw puzzle?

I'm the same with needing things to fit in baskets/ storage. If it overflows we can't have it. I don't like the solution to be "buy more baskets"

@triggersnappy I agree with you totally. My DS is still too little to be really interested in toys but a large part of why we chose the nursery that we did for him to start next year is that almost every toy they have is open-ended, they're all about creativity and imagination.

I don’t either but I’m comfortable with one storage solution for toys, books and teddies. I’d prefer one storage solution altogether but I just don’t think that’s realistic. DC is the first grandchild so grandparents like buying a lot of shit toys. My mum is the worst for it and I’m going to have to be really strict for Christmas. DC really doesn’t need this many toys and it’s just more destruction that needs tidying up at the end of the night.

Don't worry op, my son is 4.5 and we have loads 🤣 I feel no shame as it's almost all played with regularly. Much of it is second hand and will be past on again when it's time to be moved on so doesn't feel wasteful.

I'm terrible for seeing things and just being like "ds would love that".

It's just whatever works for each family I think.

We have loads of toys, I couldn't possibly list them all. I don't really do clear outs as I have 2 dds so I've kept most things from dd1 for dd2. I have put aside stuff that dd1 has grown out of, I plan to sell them but don't have time right now.
I don't think I buy too many toys for the dcs but between birthdays and Christmas, they get loads. We have tons of books

I don't get too stressed about it tbh. It's just how a house with kids is, and they'll grow out of it.

I'm terrible for seeing things and just being like "ds would love that".

100% me too. There are so many lovely toys nowadays.

I put toys away based on how annoyed I'm feeling by the amount of toys there are scattered throughout the floor.
Honestly for our eldest we were all ok here are the toys you can play with and only a few at a time, and we would tidy together before bed etc.
With 2 it's just an explosion, books everywhere, random Lego bricks, and I go through phases of putting what feels like most of the toys away, but there are always more breeding under the sofa or something?!
I watched videos telling me to get up an hour early and start curating the toy collection but if I was up early I would not be getting toys in and out!

Do these children have Grannys? I swear I would buy my DGSs a blooming toy shop if their mummy would let me