Hard to get child to nursery in morning

[complexsimplicity]

It's really hard getting child to nursery in the morning. He loves it once he's there, it's just the initial getting him there. We have to pretend we're going soft play/park etc to get him out the door. Please help!

He's starting school soon and it would be a blessing if it wasn't as tough...

I don't think lying to him is the answer. I'd be mortified if someone told me I was going on holiday and took me to work instead.

You're compounding the issue by lying to him. How awful for him, he won't trust anything you say.

I think lying probably isn’t helping and is perhaps contributing to the problem. My dc went through a stage like this and I just had to drag them kicking and screaming to nursery because there was no other way. Like your child, they would be absolutely fine and happy for the rest of the day once they got there. After a few weeks of realising they had to go to nursery, it stopped. It’s only a phase and probably by the time they have to go to school they will have changed again. My dc never once complained about going to school and runs out the door every morning now. Good luck!

Thanks. Reassuring to hear your experience and how you managed it. Exactly what us parents come here for!
Indeed, phases...

my boy sometimes says he doesn’t want to go - I let him pick a toy to play with in his pram on the way, and I let him
decide which route we take (the one that goes by the garage where he can see cars being fixed, or the one which goes by the train tracks where he might see a train - such a stereotypical boy) and this seems to work.

Bribe him but don’t lie. Example - DS is moving up from his school pre-school to reception next year & the teachers have prepared them for the last 3 months by putting away some of the toys and not letting them have unstructured play as much.

He went through a phase where he hated going, so I promised him his tablet in the school’s car park for 20 minutes if we got there early enough. It worked like a charm. Obvs don’t do this if your tablet can’t be controlled remotely!!!

DD was like this at nursery. She's still like it often now she's 7 tbh ;)

Do you have a good morning routine (breakfast, dressed etc in the same order?) I then give warnings to ease transition (five minutes til we leave, one more minute and we'll get your shoes on)

If he kicks off, try not to get flustered as well. A minute or two of letting him stew can work. I sometimes resorted to chocolate button bribes.

A couple of times I took DD carried over my shoulder. I don't recommend it but I do have an absolute line on not going to school/nursery on a whim.

Great ideas..will try a treat of sorts. Remotely controlled device? How does that work?

Ah, remotely controlled device question was meant for you. How does that work? :)

I totally understand how challenging mornings can be! It's great that he enjoys nursery once he's there. Have you tried creating a morning routine that includes fun activities or small rewards for getting ready? Sometimes a visual schedule or a special toy for the car ride can make a big difference. Transitioning to school can be smoother with a consistent routine and positive reinforcement. Hang in there, you're doing a great job preparing him for this next step!

Dd 3.5 struggled for the first couple of months. She would be like a Tasmanian devil on the way in. Agree lying to them is no good. A few things that helped were allowing her to choose snacks for me to bring to pick up and she has her own little snack bag for that. Also I got a few of those cheap t shirts from Primark and she got to choose a new one to show her teacher every time she went in which luckily was only three days so that made it easier for a couple of weeks. Obviously can’t keep buying new t shirts all the time but Now we make something or do a drawing before nursery days for her to take to show. Seems to help

I hate to say it, but this doesn’t get easier as they get older. The advantage now is he’s small enough to pick up and carry. You need to be honest but matter of fact. We need to get dressed and get our shoes on and we need to leave for nursery now. Give me a cuddle. I’ll see you in a bit and go. I imagine he must feel very confused and anxious not being told what’s really happening. Be honest but leave no room for negotiation. This is what’s happening. Love you. See you in a bit.

This way it builds trust but also sets the expectation that there are things we need to do in life and you expect him to do them.