am on the brink

[JoshandJamie]

my 2.5 year old has now been having a tantrum for one hour. I haven't slept for 4 nights. He has been ill with a chest infection and the more he screams the more he can't breathe and I should be doing all I can to calm him. But he is making it pretty impossible. If I give him what he whats (which includes insisting on wearing a pair of pants he's peed in and them being cuddled) he then escalates it to want something else. And something else. And some else. So now I've just put him in his room before so that I can calm down.

Hence me posting. just needed 3 minutes away from him because I am definitely close to losing the plot.

he'll be fine for a few mins. there's no use in getting het up or you won't be able to deal with him. have you tried steaming him?? it might help toease his chest. [hug]

Just echoing duomon, and sending you some encouragement. He'll calm soon and be ready for a snuggle. If he's still worked up, try a bath for him.

Best of luck

Well done for walking away rather than shouting back

Tomorrow is another day

Put on some cheerful tunes & dance round a bit & when you go up to him, try & imagine you're in a GREAT mood...

duomonstermum - he's had a nebuliser at the docs and is on steroids so haven't done steaming. But he's still going strong. I've never seen a tantrum like this. And we've had some doozies. DH has now luckily come home so I am having a few moments time out because I am seriously close to clobbering him. I've just tried taking him out of his room and giving him a cuddle which is what he's demanding. But then that's not enough. It has to be a stand up cuddle. Then that's not enough. it has to be a sitting on the sofa cuddle. Then that's not right, it has to be a certaiin way. And he's not sure what way he wants. And so the screaming continues. Normally I would just let him scream it out. But I keep thinking that he's just making his breathing worse. But nothing seems to be calming him down.

No advice just sympathy.

and worst of all my mother in law is here witnessing the whole bloody lot including my imminent break down as tears are perilously close

Can you and mil get busy with making fairy cakes/drawing funny animals on a pice of paper, using a slightly overloud voice to get his attention (but seeming to ignore him iyswim) eg "Come on Grandma, let's see who can draw the funniest animal" "Why don't we open that cake book and see which yummy recipe looks good" type of thing ? it may break the tension long enough for him to come out of his tantrum.

We've tried a bunch of distraction. To no avail. HE is completely beside himself. Still going strong.

try the steaming. it won't do any harm. DS had really bad bronchitis when he was around the same age and it was the only thing that kept me sane!!! i used to run the bath and get him to help to put on a face mask on my face while jabbering away about nothing. got him calm and got a facial in one

they always sound worse when they're sick don't they? loads of hugs!! and never mind MIL. if she's not helping she knows where the door is!

sometimes the only thing you can do is let them get it out of their system. it sounds harsh but so long as someone is keeping an eye on him sit down and have a cuppa so that you're calm. if DH can keep him for a few mins you coiuld always go and shout into a pillow. i used to batter mine. DH alway knew how bad a day it was by how plump the pillows were

With my ds after one of his tantrum sessions, the 'conditions' for making friends - ie standing up sitting down, you come to me (not the other way around etc) were just a way of gaining control again. And in the end i found I had to ignore him until he had come down off his red mist enough to be more reasonable. Otherwise I would be back to square one again very soon.

It is soo hard, but stay cool - do you have an mp3 player? You could put that on and imagine you are on a tropical beach or somewhere you think is fab to try and at least keep one of you calm!

It will pass - ds is now almost 5 and is a total pleasure to have around (well mostly..)!

bamzooki's right. he'll calm down eventually. the trick is in trying to stay sane in the meantime [loads more hugs]

did he settle??

thanks for all the support everyone. YEs he eventually settled after an hour and a half. I feel beyond drained. DH is bathing him and DS1 now. I am supposed to be working tonight but feel more like tucking into a bottle of wine. sigh.

as I was writing this, he started kickin off in the bath and is yelling for mummmmmmmmy....God help me

let DH deal with it. you sound beyond exhausted.

thanks for the wine. sips gratefully

is not going/doing work an option?? i'm sure you'll feel better when you've had a rest [hugs]

I've written off working tonight. Don't have the brain capacity for it. Will be veging in front of TV for about 30 mins before collapsing. Thanks for the hugs. Am feeling a bit better now.

[hands over bottle of wine] have a good night then. fingers crossed tom will be better!