Please help - my ten year old daughter’s diet is so poor

[funkmonke]

Since my daughter was small, she’s been the fussiest eater and because shes always been tiny in size we just let her eat what she wanted and what we could get inside her rather than letting her go hungry as that what she would do!! And going to school day after day or to bed with an empty stomach seemed for more detrimental than letting her eat what she wanted as she couldn’t afford to lose any weight. We were told my gps and psychologists that she would get less fussy as she got older and to not make a big deal about it.

anyway: here we are at 10.5 years and her diet consists of:

Breakfast:
pancakes and golden syrup (4 times a week)
piklets and jam

lunch:
roast chicken sandiches, salad leaves, brioche
strawberries
crisps
yoghurt (sometime)

dinner:
pizza express pizza
chicken fish goujons or burger and chips
Salad leaves
cucumber

This is all she’ll eat day after day after day…

im worried about her health going into puberty and also going to secondary school and how she’ll cope in the adult world if she can’t have simple easy lunches like pasta and jacket potatoe and cereal / toast for breakfast.

she also has a residential trip in September where the only food will be what’s there. I’m so worried about her being starving hungry!!!

does anyone else have any idea what I can do to encourage her to eat more? She seems to have phobia and very over sensitive to diff tastes and textures

anu other breakfast ideas?

we’ve tried cereal, porridge, eggs, toast, croissants

thanks in advance!

xxxxx

Any other issues other than food? Autistic traits?

Has she seen a paedatric dietitian?
What vitamins does she take?

It sounds very similar to my DS1 aged 14. He has autism and sensory issues around food and can only eat raw vegetables. He's under a paediatric dietician. Who basically recommended focus on calories and cover the bases with supplements. I really recommend seeking a referral if you can so they can assess your DD and tailor advice to her.

I have no quick fixes. But if she likes things like milkshakes I put complan powder into mine and DS will have those when he can tolerate it (once or twice a week).

Oh and do talk to the teachers in advance about the residential. They will have seen this stuff before and hopefully will be able to make adaptations for her.

This was me! I was a nightmare and I have got better but it took loads of time and it’s a slow process.

I found going to secondary school helped me as my peers were picking their own food at lunch, people started to go get takeaway with pocket money.So the peer pressure helped if I said I had never tried Chinese. I think health wise I only really started to eat vegetables post 18 as I experimented cooking them in different ways.

I hated trying new stuff at home as it was made into a massive fuss and my family would watch me or make it into a big deal.

Dont really have any suggestions but wanted to say I came out the other side (sort of…still fussy but less so)!

Have a read about AFRID.

My 5 year old DS is the same. He’s waiting for an autism assessment (he’s definitely autistic).

Tbh, your daughter’s diet has enough variety (she actually eats some salad/veg!!) that I wouldn’t be overly worried if she is able to maintain her weight.

Will she tolerate the same ingredients at different meals? ie toast or brioche for breakfast, chicken salad for dinner? Cucumber being prepared in a different way, different types of salad leaves?

There is more variety than I thought you were going to say

Im not sure why her needing to eat pasta and potatoes is the focus, she has enough grain/carb items in her diet, its the protein and veg that needs expanding but that may come in time

Yes she does have mild adhd traits, she is very hormonal and emotional - hence me just wanting her to eat as that balances her moods.

i could take her to a dietitian and see if that would help…

and yes she has multi but, iron, magnesium
and omega 3 chewy but but don’t know if they do anything!

I don't think it sounds that bad! It's not very varied but she eats salad leaves and cucumber, strawberries, roast chicken, fish...

If I were you I'd just carry on, continue to offer her alternatives or a taste of other foods, or see if you can mix up the same ingredients into a different texture/look and see how she feels about that.

My bar is low because my two youngest have very limited diets, but I don't see it as a huge cause for concern.

How old are your youngest?

I wouldn’t mind so much if she was six but it’s cause she’s going to high school next year and I feel she will just starve if she can’t eat sandwiches!! Everything has to be made in a very particular way. It can’t be normal bread - has to be brioche etc

Just because it means if she’s out with friends or at school or residential - there will be easy options for her to fill her tummy.

i worry about her going hungry if she’s not around me to prep things exactly as she likes

Unfortunately not 😔

she won’t even have brioche on its own…

it all has to be done / prepped in a certain way to get her to eat and even the diet she has now has taken years to build up
to

My DD is also about to go to secondary, and eats a similar diet. It's not always easy, especially when we're travelling, but she manages. For her school residential, we spoke to the staff in advance, and she pretty much had plain pasta and bananas all week, but she survived. It would make life easier if she ate a more varied diet, but having spoken to friends who were similarly fussy growing up, we don't make a big deal of it, and we get by.

She needs a referral to a paediatric dietician who can work with her on food issues. It’s ARFID and it’s common enough but you do need some external help and she’s at the stage where she can work on that. Try not to worry too much.

I agree with @NoSquirrels . Please make sure you see a qualified dietitian and not a nutritionalist.

I actually don't think this sounds like worst diet in the world, it could be better but whose diet is if we're honest with ourselves!

Kids can be picky eaters without jumping straight to a diagnosis! I ate a similar diet when I was a kid and hardly ever tried anything new, once I had my own money and saw more of life and ate out more I grew out of it. We give kids such complexes nowadays with all these labels. If all she would eat was one thing, and was living off one type of food then fine but she's eating some varied things, give over!

You sound like you've done a great job to get her to this point. Honestly it's not the worst diet, in fact quite decent maybe apart from the variety.
I'd just stick with that, maybe try to incorporate a new thing very slowly.
For example, do you make the pancakes from scratch? Could you try to add a small scoop of protein powder to the mix? Start with a teaspoon and work up.
Could you introduce a new flavour of yoghurt but keep the same brand ? or keep flavour the same and try a different type eg Greek yoghurt.

Don't panic OP, peer pressure may help but also just ensuring she has at least a couple of decent meals a day will also help. My DS had real food issues on texture and I did not know how he'd cope with school lunches. After a few years of not eating or eating v little, he's gradually widened the palate. Not 100pc but definitely better !