HEADBUTTING Help!!

[WearyGreyMan]

Hello, Our 2 year old has a really bad headbutting issue. He headbutts the floor, the doors, the walls, any hard surface he can really. He does it so forcefully too where he always has huge bruises and lumps on his head.

If he’s angry he does it, if he’s sad he does it. If he gets frustrated he does it. If you take something from him he does it.

He can’t sleep in a Cot since he headbutts the bars or stands up and hits his teeth against the top which worries me that he’ll break them or make them bleed. He’s in a toddler bed which he doesn’t sleep in.

We currently have him fall asleep in his mothers arms and put him in the Toddler bed. He will sleep for 20minutes and then wake up crying and trying to escape to headbutt since he thinks if he headbutts then he’ll get to sleep in our bed.

He won’t sleep by himself. We don’t want him sleeping in our bed because of SIDS and the risk of rolling onto him. However he can’t sleep by himself at all since he wakes up and headbutts the door.

When it’s the day it’s easier since someone can watch him at all times to stop him headbutting. Our current strategy is when he headbutts we put him on the bed so he can’t anymore, he’ll cry for 20-30mins and then stop and that’s when we put him back down again.

But the issue is, 5 mins later he’ll headbutt something and hurt himself. So with this he will have to spend almost all the day sat on the bed crying so he’s not a danger to himself which obviously can’t be done since he can’t just sit and scream all day that’s no fun for him!

can anyone advise? Please! Since professional people we’ve spoken to just say that this is all happening because of lack of routine but that doesn’t make sense.

please comment!

My younger brother used to do this as a toddler. It was awful to watch. My mum used to have to carry a cushion around with him, ready to throw under his head when he did it. Nothing stopped him. He just grew out of it, and my parents just always tried to throw something between his head/wall/floor, etc, when he did it. Apparently, it was a self comforting thing babies do, according to the doctors. We weren't allowed to fuss around him when he did it, had to ignore him as the attention we gave him to stop just made it worse.

Hi, I have a similar 2.5 year old. He is on the ASD pathway for assessment, the headbutting seems to be out of frustration (he is non verbal) and for him is a way to get my attention. He doesn't sleep well alone either. I know you don't want to co sleep but it's the only thing that's worked for us. The magic cure was getting him a double bed and going in to lie down with him every time he woke up.

In the day distraction works.

He actually broke my nose twice at the beginning but seems to have calmed down now and sleeps so much better in a bigger bed. Is that an option? I also leave the bedroom door open with a baby gate across.

He's not at nursery anymore because his needs are too high but when he was they made a pile of cushions for him specifically to bang his head into which seemed to work for them, that might be another solution.