Counselling for anxiety in 8 year old

[CluelessInBognor]

Hi, My dd has been struggling for a few years with not being able to be alone anywhere in the house, intrusive scary thoughts, etc. We were hoping with patience and understanding she would grow out of it but it doesn't look like it.

I am enquiring about counselling services and was about to make an appointment but then got cold feet. I guess I am worried that they will somehow make it worse or they will make it a big thing for her or thst she will think thwt there is something wrong with her.

Also, I'm not sure how to find a good one. I found a clinic that offers private sessions in my town. What are rhe questions I need to ask to find put if they are right for us? How do I know they have the right qualifications? They charge £80 for an hour. Is that standard?

Would it be better to speak to her GP first? I could be mistaken but I highly doubt she would be able to see someone on the NHS anytime soon but I haven't asked.

When I did it for my son, my and my husband spoke to the counsellor, my child never spoke to her directly. She gave us parenting advice and exercises to do with him. He never knew we were speaking to her. Her guidance really helped improve his anxiety so we stopped there.

She said that the next step would have been play therapy where she worked with him but you'd have time and space to decide whether you want to take that next step.

Also the counsellors will speak to you for a few minutes on the phone to help judge whether you're a good fit for each other before you actually book a paid appointment.

So I'd suggest contacting a few through https://www.bacp.co.uk/search/Therapists

and having a few chats which will help hone your view of what might work best for your child.

I really recommend starting the process, it really helped us

Hi, I'm a children's counsellor that works with 8+. I would play, draw etc with them and talk about anxiety. Firstly in a psycho educational way (bodily feelings, its purpose etc) before helping them to challenge thinking and working together to find strategies. I would never force them to talk about what they don't want to talk about.

Vast majority of them love coming and find it helpful. For a handful a year it doesn't fit, either I am not the right person or they don't like it. Far as I aware it's never made anyone worse.

Have a (free) chat with Therese Langford of https://www.facebook.com/calmmindhypnotherapy - she works exclusively with children.

Thanks very much. I think I'd prefer to first talk to the counsellor myself as well so I can speak freely. I have contacted a few from the bacp website you linked. Very helpful. Thanks.

Thank you. That sounds promising. Would you recommend a clinic or an independent counsellor, who e.g. works from home?

I just spoke to the clinic but I wasn't too reassured. They got a bit inpatient when I started asking about experience and qualification of rhe counsellor they have matched us with.

Well, I would call a couple and see if you gel with them. The BACP website will give you a list of children's counsellors in your area.

I work for an agency.

Children presenting with anxiety are usually misdiagnosed as anxious.

They are usually undiagnosed ND.
particulary girls

My own Dd presented with anxiety about 8

Diagnosed Audhd at 16

Not always. Sometimes they've had a tough time of it and sometimes they just need some help managing anxiety.

DS had some anxiety symptoms (not ND) and was able to access psychotherapy (CBT) via a great early intervention scheme run collaboratively by school and local CAMHS. It really helped him to understand anxiety, how it can manifest as physical symptoms and gave him some really helpful self management tools. Could you ask school if they have access to any support?

Hi can I ask how you got on with this please? I’m in exactly the same boat at the minute thinking of seeking help for my 10 year old & don’t no where to start.

I listened to an interesting 2 part podcast about childhood anxiety, and mindsets/approaches for parents to consider to tweak in their parenting to help their kids.

I rate the podcast, it’s called Raising Good Humans and tends to have professors and highly experienced speakers. This episode is called ‘Everything you need to know to help kids manage their anxiety with Yale psychologist Dr Eli Lebowitz’.

Sorry old thread, but i suspect we have a similar situation. Did your DD get treatment at 16, and did her life improve/anxiety go away?
My DD10 has crippling anxiety but I also suspect ADHD.
Thanks

@CluelessInBognor Hi! Wondering if you had any update on your DD, did you pursue counselling? In a very similar situation. Thanks

CBT is better for anxiety - speak to a GP first