Self harm?

[Bdad]

Hi,
The last two nights, when putting to bed my almost 4yo daughter, she has talked about breaking and cutting off her fingers.
I'm hoping it's all innocent, maybe she's learnt about the dangers of scissors at nursery or something.

But to mention it two nights running has concerned me.
Is this something I should be concerned about?

Additionally, her mother and I broke up around a year ago and we are not on good terms. We communicate via a parenting app only. I think it's important to tell her what our daughter has said, but I don't want it to come across as accusatory. As much as I dislike her mother, I do not believe she would physically harm our daughter. How do I word a message to convey my concern, but not accuse her mother of anything?

Thanks for reading, any advice is gratefully received.

I'm not sure why a message saying
I just wanted to make you aware that tonight DD said....
Could be accusatory?

Children at that age are bizarre and inquisitive about the strangest of things. This isn't self harm and I think you are reading way too much into it, unless there is a back story you're not telling us?

I'm honestly not sure I'd think much of this. Kids say strange things. From our adult perspective, this sounds really grim. But you'd be amazed how much this is in children's programming on tv and books, especially classic fairytales, etc. There's some really weird, dark stuff in stories that children can be read. Does she watch any tv? Go to nursery/school? I suspect she's heard something in a story and is repeating it, especially before bed when the mind is doing lots of replaying of what it's thought about during the day. I really wouldn't put your adult label of 'self harm' on this. And honestly, I don't even think this is something I'd mention to my dh about one of our dc other than in a bit of baffled amusement. I mean, it's a bit odd, but I don't think it's necessarily a red flag for anything on its own.

Have you asked her about it? Where she heard about this? What she's worried about? It would be only if she expressed a worry about something probably that I'd mention it. A child at nursery said he'd chop her finger off if she didn't give him a toy. She heard it in a story at storytime at the library and it sounded scary and now she's feeling nervous about the dark, etc.