10 year old won't stop stealing food

[Bubz91]

I'm at my whits end really, he's been doing it for years here and there taking odd bits of chocolate that he finds buy its gotten really out of hand now.
He was diagnosed with ADHD a couple of years ago if so I would often let it slide because of this but now he's 10 it just feels like he should be better at his impulse control.
I've gone through the kitchen and got rid of stuff and bought lock boxes for household stuff like chocolate spreads and chips for cookies so there is nothing he can get ahold of.
Well this morning he's tried to eat a chocolate brownie mix packet, like the ready to bake kids where you just add milk too as well as moose mix and its gotten everywhere, it's taken me 3 hours to clean it all up.
He isn't restricted from sweets and does have the occasional bit and gets puddings after meals in an attempt to get him to stop stealing it but clearly its not helping.
Anyone been through this with their ADHD kids?
Thanks in advance.

3 hours to clean up? How on earth did he make so much mess?

Hopefully you made him clean it up with you?

It was EVERYWHERE, in an attempt to hide what he did he hid it in drawers, cupboards under the microwave. Every where I turned was powder. Essentially had to deep clean the entire kitchen as well as clean everything in the draws and cupboards.

This! He should have helped at least. And how did you not know what he was up to?
With ADHD children you really do need eyes in the back of your head sadly.
Can you somehow make the kitchen off limits? Or take away something he enjoys (screen time?) to help him manage his impulses?

Don't buy that kind of food, or just get locks for all the cupboards and fridge and give free reign over the fruit bowl and juice.

I mean this kindly, but I'm not sure why you think that now he's 10, his impulse control should be better. ADHD causes poor impulse control. It's not something that he's going to grow out of.

Is he medicated for his ADHD? If not, then that's something to be addressed. Reach out for help at school, charities etc. Look at ADHD.co.uk for advice. As I say, it's not just going to improve on its own I'm afraid.

He got up at 4am according to our cctv si by the time I got up at 6am he'd already done it.

That’s a more serious issue! If he has poor impulse control and was unsupervised for two hours he could have done more damage, either to himself or the house. Has he done this before?

It's not so much to do with his age really, he was diagnosed at 6 and we've done all sorts of strategies and ideas with him and when it comes to his impulse control its just something he's never improved on and I'm truly out of ideas on what can be done.
The school aren't interested in anything at home as he is fine at school for the most part.
He is on medication for his ADHD.

Craving sugar is common with ADHD ( I have an adult son with ADHD) It's the dopamine hit, but it can make symptoms worse. Have you looked into to the links between sugar and ADHD to try and understand it better? Just locking everything away won't help, as you've seen by the fact he's eaten brownie mix. Try not to think of it as stealing, it's part of his condition which he needs some help managing. Is on he on medication?

I know how you feel about school not being interested, unfortunately.

Apologies if you aren't in the UK, but this is a link to the ADHD support page. It has links to their local area support, Facebook page and a place to sign up for forthcoming events.

The parent support facebook pages are brilliant. I've done a few webinars with them to. Some of them are generic, but every now and then one will pop up that's more specific about food issues/ impulse control etc.

I don't have this specific issue, but as an Autistic / ADHD parent to an AuDHD DD I appreciate how exhausting it is.

Dont know if you might also get some advice if you repost this on the SEN board here. Some very wise MNers there who have likley dealt with similar.

https://adhduk.co.uk/support/

I am in the UK so thanks for the link, I'll take a look.
Both of my boys have diognosed ADHD but they are both very different and we have completely different challenges with the older son.

I have ADHD although wasn’t diagnosed as a child.
I often took food as I had very poor impulse control. My mum was horrible about it and was always calling me selfish and greedy.
I am very low contact with her and end up with anorexia due to her.
please just pick your battles, and work together to find a solution.

But did you make him help you with the 3 hour clean up?

I'm sorry to hear that 💔
It's why I'm struggling with how to deal with it, I would never call him names anyway but I know he can't help it

Attempted too but he refused to help so he ended up sitting on the floor in the kitchen till I was done.

Attempted too but he refused to help so he ended up sitting on the floor in the kitchen till I was done.

I have this issue, my son (13) has absolutely no impulse control when it comes to food, especially sweet stuff. It's an ongoing battle. I can't leave him unsupervised at all because of his impulsive behaviour and his ADHD is complicated by autism.

I have hiding places for things otherwise we'd have no food. It's the only way I can spread things across the week. I stupidly left a six pack of crisps out a couple of weeks ago and before I realised, he'd eaten the whole lot. I did get cross with him but he just looks at me as if i'm being unreasonable. He is also obsessed with fizzy stuff so I only buy sparkling water to try and deal with that. He can add a bit of squash if he wants. He can drink a whole 1.5L bottle in one go though so I have to watch him like a hawk.

We are awaiting medication, the last prescription gave him migraines but as we all know the waiting lists are so very long. I bought a pouffe thing with storage inside and have made it a feature in the front room with a couple of throws folded on top. He has no idea it's hollow so things go in there. I have friends who use locked boxes or have cupboard locks. I have a suitcase under the bed too. It's really difficult so you have all my sympathy but it really is a case of managing it in a way he can't have access.

Don't call it stealing.

Can DC help choose some healthy food that he can have free access to - fruit, yoghurt, bread with jam. Make some biscuits or muffins together.

In one way it helps knowing its not just him but also knowing I'm going to have to get harsher with what I leave out.
He's always got access to healthy snacks, fruit, veg, squash and juice so there's always something he can have and it just shocks me that he'd opt for coca powder over cereal bars with chips in it.
Thank you for sharing, I'll have to look into some other measures to keep stuff secure.

He does, he has 3 baskets of snacks (cereal bars, cake bars, dried fruit ect) fruit bowl and the door of the fridge is full of snacks he has free reign of.

This. Just don’t have junk in the house.
so sorry OP what a crap set-up you have.

You said it yourself he has poor impulse control and ADHD .. He is 10 .

My D’s with ADHD craves junk food especially sugar . He makes cake mix and eats it uncooked in the middle of the night .

You will not punish or control that out of him … however does he take melatonin for sleep ? Mine does but only on school days so weekends are worse . But also it wouldn’t be optimal to refuse to clean up .

I would leave him sat there till he makes an attempt at least .

Have you tried tracking it to see if there's any patterns or triggers? My impulse control gets a LOT worse when Im exhausted or overwhelmed or not sleeping. Same for my Autistic DC. I do seek sugar and my other impulse behaviour is shopping, I believe that gives a similar dopamine hit. Along with exhaustion and stress my abusive ex is a big trigger. I don't get into debt and I can save. but currently only if I take the money out as cash and hide it somewhere. I have period's where I manage a lot better and honestly my life has a lot of unusual stresses in it, so I wouldn't think my behaviour is necessarily indicative of what it might be like for your son as an adult, but just that the behaviours might be impulses but the drive behind the impulses might be able to be reduced if they're being triggered or they're due to some stressor. When Im sleeping well and eating well and not having to deal with my abusive ex I do a lot better and the impulses while they still occur do so a lot less often and have less impact on my life.

Why isn't he cleaning it? He's deliberately made a mess this isn't an attempt to hide it

@Bubz91 I honestly don't think it's shocking that he picked the powder. It's a deep seated need for dopamine and that's what he focussed on. It must be so very difficult for these children to control. Try not to think of it as stealing as he's not doing that, he's just seeking what he feels he needs. You're just going to have to keep things out of the way. I admit I get cross when money is short and he's eaten things I'm trying to spread across a few days. He is very well fed but it never seems enough. You're not alone with this.