After abuse

[taleoldastime]

A tale as old as time. Abusive bastard ex, three children of primary age.
He's been no contact for two years. Nothing legal in place.
As if this week I've seen him twice, once in the street of my (our) child's school. I have serious alarm bells ringing that he's building up nerve to approach or something.
Could be coincidence but in case it's not, is there anything I can do to ensure the children are legally living with me or anything? He has parental responsibility legally so I'm just afraid. Thankyou

I'm so sorry. That's a horrible situation to be in. He would have to go through the courts so it wouldn't be instant. The courts see it as the childs right to have a relationship with both parents. If there is a history of abuse this will be considered, especially if any abuse was directed towards the children. On these grounds he might be given access but not custody. The courts will only deal with the evidence in front of them so you will need to prove that your children will be at risk with him. Will he want to go through that process? I really feel for you. I'm in a similar (albeit different) situation. I think that I will live with that fear until my daughter is 18 and can make her own choices. I'm no expert so will be watching this thread in case any other mns have any ideas. Hope it all works out for you.

Thankyou. He's threatened court but that would involve spending money and so far that seems unlikely.
I'm scared he will approach the kids at the fence at playtime or something.
He's a typical bully in that he's also a coward and he's been steering clear of the area but obviously I guess he's more local again now. I went into fight or flight when I saw him, he didn't see me

I wouldn't do anything. No point going to court if he hasn't approached you... would be rocking the boat.