My child has been excluded from school’s sports

[Mamaolivera]

Just wanted to ask what you people do when your child is left out of every sports activities organised by her school. My child plays after school sports and does lots of sports outside the school but I feel that the PÉ teacher has his favourites as he always picks the same kids to represent the school. Spoke to headteacher but feels like it goes in one year and out of the other. Just find it so unfair as many other kids are in the same situation and nothing is being done to fix it. I just wondered if anyone had the same issue and if you managed to get heard. Very frustrating and sad for kids not being offered the same opportunities specially at school where it should be the ethos .

You are massively over invested in this OP. If your son can’t handle not being picked then maybe competitive sports are not for him. How do you think the rest of the team will feel if they have to include someone who isn’t as good at the sport just because his Mum had winged to the Head.

It’s a long time since I was at primary school but yes the most sporty girls eg in netball were picked for matches with other schools and same for football matches. There were about 3-4 girls I knew personally who were very sporty and talented at netball and then a few more boys with football. These boys spent ages practising and the girls did too.

There might’ve been favouritism but at the end of the day the school wants to win matches and leagues, cups, etc so that’s why the best players are chosen.

Bluntly, your child isn’t good enough for matches, maybe just not enough talent.

Exactly. Say they do something competitive means winning something big and your child lets the team down. He’d feel awful and so would they.

Maybe he’s not competitive enough, I wasn’t. There’s nothing wrong with that.

By favourites do you mean the best players ?

Often it is about ability it is just that you don't share the same opinion ad the coaches who see all the children and can't accept that perhaps your child is not as good as those selected.

Not being picked isnt excluded

I really wish it was the case so we could just accept it, it would be much easier but unfortunately it isn’t! It’s not about picking the best players and winning trophies. There was one competition where the coach put my child’s name on the list as they were strong at that activity but again they were not chosen by the PE.

Why isn’t your child going directly to the teacher and saying ‘Coach what could I do to earn a place on the team. I am keen and want to work hard to get there’. Crying and going through mummy doesn’t show maturity that sports coaches require. Good skill to have and will earn respect if the coach is worth his salt.

Is the school prioritizing the kids who don't have the opportunities to do this sort of stuff out of school - either for money or caring reasons?
So, nothing to do with ability, but everything to do with showing kids what can exist outside their life that is restricted or limited in someway?

We had similar but didn’t bother contacting the school about it.
I would suggest your DC looks for a club outside of school for the sports they enjoy best, ideally with an inclusive/everybody plays ethos, and develops their skills. Then when they go to high school they will have a better chance of getting into one of the teams, or continuing playing the sport out of school.
Yes it’s annoying that the same kids swan out every other afternoon and return with a medal and the glory, but it’s junior school sport. It’s not the olympics. Even the kids won’t remember what they won next year.

If this is a sports club after school that you are paying for, is it actually run by the school or are they just hosting an external provider?
If it’s the latter, you need to discuss your concerns with the provider, not the head teacher.

having a similar issue and hear what you’re saying that it doesn’t always seem talent related. I have brought it up with the head of year but sense will be fobbed off.

How big is your school? As this happens in our school too but in reality it can't be helped as the teachers have to choose maybe 6 pupils to represent the school in a sport competition out of a school with 700 pupils so chances are it won't be our daughter that gets picked. That's life isn't it?

I imagine most of the class aren't getting picked either? Hardly being excluded.

I see this is an old-ish thread resurrected but just wanted to say in my primary school children were very much chosen on the basis of ability. I played hockey, was selected to represent the school in the “A” team in primary 7 (year 6 equivalent) and was not selected for the school football team the year before that which I personally still think was a wrong decision by the school janitor /coach 👀😂 but I’d never have dreamed of my mum going up and making a fuss about it.

I mean that was the 90s but having worked in various primary schools more recently, I’ve definitely seen kids picked to represent school based on ability.

If it’s just one kid getting left out that may be more of an issue, but if you say lots of kids aren’t getting to represent the school it sounds like they are being picky and selecting them based on ability.

OP you haven't really taken on-board the feedback. Your child is not selected because they aren't of the same ability - unfortunately, as harsh as this comes across, your child may not be the A team.

Set up a B team, or some sort of compromise to include the rest of the kids.

Your child gets the opportunity to do the sport out of school that’s fantastic for them. A lot of children don’t get those same chances so maybe school have picked those children to ensure they get an opportunity too.

So in the whole school your child is the only one excluded? How do you know?

They pick the best ones to represent the school in competition. Practice!