Giving your kids a 90s childhood

[Curlewwoohoo]

This concept has caught my eye. The algorithm has noticed so of course now keeps showing me idyllic reels along these lines! They commonly feature lots of fresh air, playing out, low screen time. From infants school age I used to play out in the street on bikes, just kids no adults. Junior school age we'd go down the fields or cycle to the library. I really feel my 9yo Dd in particular would be really suited to this lifestyle. But where we live the only kids who play out are the trouble makers! I know it's not all roses, there were lots of times I was very bored! Just wondered if anyone here raises their kids like it's the 90s and how!

That sounds lovely!! I too leave the gardening to my mum as I’m useless!

I had a 90s child hood.

We played outside and in the woods. Except when people with knives were wandering around the woods and after a kid got knifed our parents were much more reluctant to let us out.

We played by the railway tracks and ran along with trains until the railway police told us it was a bad idea.

I climbed lots of trees and fell out regularly and broke at least three limbs which my mum didn't believe and told me to stop making it up until it still hurt a week later and she finally took me to hospital,

I loved playing football but girls weren't allowed on boys teams and there were no girls teams around me and all the boys and the adults told me football wasn't for girls.

I went on work experience with the police and they wanted to scare the work experience girl so they showed me photos of someone who'd died in a railway accident and had body parts strewn everywhere. I had nightmares for weeks.

And you want to give them that?

I had a 90s childhood and I'm bloody glad my children won't

My 90s childhood was living on a main road in the middle of the country- no amenities in the village. Our only clubs, brownies etc were attached to the primary school in the next village so we only ever saw the same kids. My childhood was very confined to the house apart from scheduled days out or playdates.

My kids have lots of activities living close to aa city and lots of different groups of friends at each one. We can walk to a park. They don't 'play out' but I don't know anyone who does or did like that. I feel like their childhood is more idyllic in lots of ways!

I grew up in the 80s/90s and spent quite a lot of time hanging out in parks with my friends, drinking alcohol, snogging boys and chain smoking. Good times.

You obviously realise your experience isn’t the same as everyone’s. My 90s childhood was nothing like this at all.

We live somewhere very similar and it’s great, I actively searched for it when I moved here 15 years ago as I grew up in a similar cul de sac. We have a meadow, woods and river, are away from main roads, yet don’t live rurally at all(it’s a market town). The kids just come and go as they please, we all sit out every evening and have a cuppa together in the summer.

I would say that if people want to live like this, location is key. Look to raise your family somewhere off the main road.

I grew up in the 90s and never played out. The road was busy/fast and the houses far apart so not many close neighbours. Quite a lot of screen time too - we had various shows that we all sat down to watch each week. We were lucky to have a great garden though that my dad looked after really well.

I wouldn't be happy with my children playing unsupervised. Eldest has ASD and ADD so can be easily distracted and/or misled. Younger 3 are too young (3 and under). We do spend a lot of time outside though and avoid using the car when possible e.g. eldest had ballet this morning, so DH walked with her and 2 brothers and then while they waited for her he took the boys to a shop in the village before they walked back. Later this afternoon he's planning on taking them to a pub with a great playground, again by walking.

We have minimal screens. Just don't put it on often, although the boys sometime have 15 minutes of iPlayer after their nap as I wake them up and they are groggy but I need to get them turned around quickly for school run. None of the kids ask for it, and if they do the answe is "not now, we're going to get xyz out instead".

That's the first thing that I thought of too!

I was basically given free reign from 15 onwards. My parents had no idea where I was, who I was with or when I'd be back. I was gone days sometimes 😄

The place we moved to once we had kids they love it out on there bikes, playing in the woods,river and fields behind our house with the other kids who live here. Best move we made from the city

@Ladyj84 could you tell it would be like that, before you moved? Or was it a happy realisation?

This is what I'm after @TribeofFfive
How did you set about finding a house that would deliver?

This is dependent on where you live. I and my husband were children in 80"s/90's. ( we are same age)
He lived in central London and never played out.
I grew up in a very safe suburban area and always played out.
We live in a safe area and our children play out as I did. Always within site of the house as I did.
We do minimal screen for primary school age child etc. To be honest DD childhood looks like mine. Our older teen is on the computer as he is mid GCSE.
It's not that different nowadays to be honest if you are not giving your child technology all the time. I would never give a primary school age child a phone for example.

Oh and we did have a computer in our house in the 80's and most certainly did play computer games! 😄
Adults also used to complain we watched to much TV etc. It really isn't that different.
Now go back to the 1950's if you want that truly wholesome childhood away from screens!

I would say my 3 year old is having a fairly similar childhood to mine so far!

I am a SAHM (my mum was too), we are out and about in the fresh air as much as possible, read lots of books, limited screen time (TV only, we don't have ipads etc. And he doesn't use my phone at all.) I'm even downloading albums onto my streaming service so we he will hear whole albums from start to finish as we all still did in the 80s/90s.

Meals are all eaten at the table, we chat with the radio on.

I'm quite strict with manners and boundaries.

We don't do online food shops, he helps me round the supermarket.

However, I am glad that support for SEN and pastoral care is much better than it was when I was growing up in the 90s. I'd have benefitted hugely from this and I think my son will.

I was born in 1980, unsafe area of London, we were not allowed out to play freely. I did have a Spectrum ZX, then a Sega, then a Game Boy, a TV in my room from age 7 and free reign to watch whatever I wanted before the watershed until I was 13 then I could watch it all night if I wanted and I was drinking, smoking and clubbing from age 14, moved out of home at 17. I was surrounded by domestic violence, poverty and mental health issues.

Just like today, a 90s childhood is no guarantee of the idealised childhood you're thinking of. If you mean you want to ban the internet and screens, just do that, but that's not 'a 90s childhood', same as all childhoods aren't homogenous today.

Apart from phones it's still pretty 90s-like where I live (Finland), children play out, bike everywhere, swim in the lake without adult supervision from about 8 or 9 years up (I do not let my children do this!) and teenagers hang out outside in the summer around ilicit campfires and drink.

My DD played out lots until about 11 or so, when outside suddenly became uncool. My 6 year old ds plays out in the garden a lot, climbing trees and whatnot, and hangs out with similar aged children on our street (they play in gardens and houses not the actual street though, there's no pavement here)

I am a 90's kid and I must say I really miss everything about it! I feel sorry for my kids because kids today seem so bored and don't know how to function or play without screens. It's a blessing and a curse really. The streets just ain't as they used to be. I used to play with kids outside & today not a chance I'd let my kids out alone (nast world).

I think my kids have a similar childhood to the one i had. My dd is listening to music and reading a book, just back from shopping in town with me. My ds is older and at work (Saturday job)
They have more screen time than I did but we eat together most of the time no phones in the bedroom at night. Have a few tv shows we all watch together. Roast dinner on Sundays. I'm a sahm like my mum was.
I don't think they need to be out on the streets to have a 90s childhood, you could always limit screentime.

Obviously the point here is don’t recreate the 90s, but get some inspiration as to what about it was good for kids.

For me some of that is: backing off, letting them navigate friendships largely on their own. Giving them independence where possible (I’m amazed at how many year 5/6s in our school are walked to school, some of them don’t even have to cross a single road to get there). Having plenty of time when they’re expected to entertain themselves, without screens. Lots of time outdoors. Living in a small village with a school that most local kids attend helps a lot.

We try and do some of this on holidays - eg going camping on sites that we know are secure so that they can have freedom to explore alone from a young age.

Scouts is good for it too. Independence and responsibility encouraged in a way school doesn’t, from a young age. Find a good group which spends all their time outdoors (we take the Beavers indoors from Nov - Feb, other than that all groups are outside all the time).

😂😂😂

This was my 90s/00s childhood and it was brilliant! We were so lucky. In many ways, particularly the outdoorsy part, I’m able to recreate with my kids but they’re still too young yet to go off out of the garden/out of sight and I haven’t decided yet how we will manage that/where boundaries will lie. We do manage 1000 hours outside a year (roughly as obv I don’t count) and they also get screen time, probably similar to what I had as a child but no advert watching!

@TribeofFfive Where do you live?? 🙏