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Parenting

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Is it normal to feel like this?

26 replies

thecowjumpedoverthemoon7 · 16/05/2024 22:16

Hi! I've not really posted on here before but I just wanted to know your advice/opinions.
My DD is 7 months old.
DH works long 12+ hour night shifts.
Basically I'm finding things a little difficult and just wanted to know if this is normal, if there's light at the end of the tunnel or what 🤦‍♀️
I'm a FTM and as DH works nights and isn't around during the day as he sleeps so I do most things house and parenting wise.
When he gets home from work, he either gives DD her breakfast or occupies her so I can get showered/dressed or make myself breakfast/lunch, and do general chores. This is only for an hour or so though as he has soon has to go to bed (long shifts)
DD doesn't sleep well and wakes several times during the night. She naps for about 30-60 mins in the day- during nap times I either do housework, grab a bite to eat or prepare her food, or we are out on a walk/shopping.
I'm really finding it hard to find time for myself. I feel like my life is just a constant rush to get things done in the time DH has her or whilst she naps. At night I try and get some sleep where I can- last night I managed to get about 3/4 hours. I am absolutely exhausted, I've not been well the past couple of weeks and now I have a cold sore 😩 I just feel so run down.
A few people have asked why DH doesn't help when he's off work- he does but of course her being awake also means it wakes me and I feel like I can't sleep until I know she's settled.
I went back to work when she was 10 weeks old and work two evenings a week for a couple of hours whilst my parents have her (high mortgage repayments due to interest rates) but I'm going to be increasing my hours as from September- 2 full days in addition to this. I'm worried I'm not going to be able to manage and burn out. Please tell me it gets easier 😩

OP posts:
GeckoFeet · 23/05/2024 14:57

Baby is old enough to sleep train now. (Not cry it out, that's awful) There are plenty of gentle sleep training techniques that you can find by googling.

Obvs that doesn't change the main difficulty of your DH working long hours but just thought I'd throw it in there as I think sleep deprivation makes everything 10 times worse.

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