How to tame my child to do her hair?!

[anonqrtb]

My DD is 19 months old and has a fair amount of hair - enough to do styles with.

I can tell it annoys her getting in her face etc, but if I ever do anything to her hair she pulls it out instantly.

has anyone got any tips?! How do I do it so she doesn’t take it out?
how do you all style your toddlers hair?

thanks in advance!

You have 3 options.

Cut her hair into a style that can be worn down without annoying her.

Continue to tie hair back and when she takes it out, try a variety of methods, plaits, clips, head bands etc. ( I braided my dd's hair at that stage)

Accept that she's probably not got the cognitive ability to connect the length / type of hair with the reasons for her annoyance, ie the tying back or the hair in her face and leave her to be frustrated.

At this age I'd do option 1.

I would just get it cut super short into a pixie style and then she doesn't need to go through it anymore. I don't understand the point in making her have longer hair that needs styling if she hates having it styled.

Also it depends on your DD's hair type. Mine had very curly hair so braiding made sense, but I know that very fine straight hair is much more difficult to keep in a style, so that will make a difference.

At that age it was just a little pineapple - just the front bit of hair with a little elastic to keep it off her face. Made sure it was loosely done so not pulling/hurting. So like this image but just the very front elastic. Get a big bag of the little elastics from primark, savers etc.

https://pin.it/7lCdJ0fWT

Her hair is quick thick but straight and soft, we have already cut her a fringe it to keep the immediate bits out of her hair, so I think cutting it really short would look a bit bowl cut and I really want to avoid that 😂

My son has thick curly fine hair ,I can tell you it is very difficult to style his hair even more with hair braided.His hair looks frizzy within 2 days 😭

He has 4a/4b hair type so super curly.

I have these struggles too so I’m watching with interest.

My DD is mixed so has ringlets all over but won’t actually physically let me do it 😭😭😭😭

I'll admit I've got boys with short hair, so this exact issue hasn't really come up, but for similar toddler struggles (tooth brushing, hair/fingernail cutting, getting dressed), there's honestly no shame in putting a 5-10 minute cartoon on. Then if they mess about/run off, you pause it until they sit still again, then press play.

I’m no stranger to screen time when it’s needed (prepared to be blasted!) but it doesn’t really grab her attention - she rarely watches it, just glances briefly whilst pointing out anything else she can see so TV doesn’t work for us 😢

It's an age thing. We went through about 6 months of it being an irritant and trying to put bobbles/hair clips in before she got to an age where she accepted it. Think around 2 she became more compliant!

I had crazy crazy frizzy hair as a child and my mum and sister always wanted to plait it or absolutely tame it with a zillion hair clips that would feel like my head was barricaded where I just wanted a ponytail. Is that the story or does she want it down? If her hair is very frizzy etc a short cut would be a nightmare (I had it short for a few years and all I wanted was to tie it back!!) I think the biggest thing I ever learned was to try not to fight it, as long as it’s hydrated and healthy(with a dose of conditioner then oils as she’s older), it doesn’t matter

I did think that would be the answer, she’ll just have to look a scruff for another couple
months haha!

I have two DDs who both had a fair bit of hair quite early. I found it helped to do it when their hair was annoying them – hair flopping in face and getting repeatedly pushed away, swoop in with a hair slide (I used full-sized ones, not the tiny children's ones) or little bobble, quickly clip/tie hair away. They made the connection pretty quickly that this thing in their hair kept it out of their eyes, but there's still a certain amount of repetition needed (and then they pull it out because it's annoying them, but bring it to you to put back in because their hair is annoying them). I also used proper tiny bobbles, not the coloured elastic bands, so they'd be easier to get out or adjust without pulling.

2.5yrs here, still have to messily scrape it into a pony tail or piglets, no comb, no neatness as she'll stay still 5-10 second lol

Cut it. Seriously. She can grow it again later.

She won't care what it looks like at that age and neither will her peers. If she was a boy I doubt you'd be insisting on keeping more hair for aesthetics when she dislikes having it done. I think her comfort is more important personally, plus easier for you as a consequence.

A little pixie cut doesn't need to look anything like a bowl cut anyway if a good hairdresser does it.

Of course she doesn’t care what it looks like - but I do?
unsure why your tone of message makes it sound like I’m torturing my child, I just want her to look presentable some times and not have notty hair?

yoir right, if she was a boy I would t have this issue as I imagine it would be cut short - but she’s not a boy. What a weird post.

Girls can have short hair. HTH.

why does every post on mumsnet have to turn into a WOKE movement.

boys can have long hair, girls can have short hair. Yes, all correct.

I want to know how parents have managed to style their children’s hair, if your post isn’t to that effect then don’t comment - I am not interested in your opinion on whether I should do it or not - I just want to know tips from parents on how they managed this with their children.

thank you to you for the helpful comments!

@anonqrtb Nothing to do with wokeness. I don't think children of either sex should have hair that has any impact on their lives at all until they are old enough to express a personal preference. So nothing that gets in their way, takes time or is potentially distressing him in any way.

My daughter has her hair cut into a bob so if we only manage clips at the front that is fine but there is enough to get up if she wants it up. She now is interested and I ask her what she wants, which I think is key unless you can distract them with something! Also the little elastic bobbles are good as they can't really pull them out!

My daughter has slow growing hair so she was 3 before we could do anything with it but we do 1 or 2 little french plaits just to take the weight out of the hair at the front they are quite loose and I had better success getting her to be less bothered by them by putting them in the night before and leaving them in for a couple of days whilst they slowly work their way loose