Extremely shy toddler

[Mummytobr]

Hey!

My toddler is almost 3. We take him to soft play at least once a week, the park, loads of activities, and toddlers once a week.

He loves soft play, happy to see and follow other kids but when it comes to our toddler group which we’ve been going to for a year, he hides and won’t come out at all. He also rarely speaks while we’re there. These are all mostly faces he’s used to by now. He won’t say hi/bye to any of the kids or parents, he’s just a shell of himself there.

We tried another toddler group and he was the same there and he’s pretty much been like this his whole life.

Hes extremely shy with family members he doesn’t see often and will absolutely not interact at all with strangers, not even a smile/hello.

It’s really getting to the point where I think it could be something more than just shyness. He’s extremely smart and brilliant at talking but socially he’s a different boy.

anyone have any pointers? 😔

My DS was also very shy around that age, so much so he didn't even speak in groups bigger than 4. He's now 13 and still struggles with peers and like you mentioned family members we only see on occasion.

I wouldn't worry just yet. Shyness can just be that especially being a Covid-baby. I would try to set up one-on-one play dates with people from the toddler groups at your house or at a favourite park. This can help him get to know other toddlers better without the group pressure.

If you are still worried, therapy is never going to hurt. It can help a child find a sense of confidence and learn skills and coping mechanisms when dealing with a group.

One thing I found with my DS, who is also quite quiet, was that he was much happier at Playgroup if we arrived early and the room was fairly empty then gradually filled up than he was if we walked in and the room was already full. Maybe you could volunteer to help set the room up and gave you with him?