Summer born twins - school part time?

[LilMagpie]

My twins are July babies but were due at the end of August. They are due to start reception in September. Everything in my gut is screaming at me that they’re not ready. They still have huge tantrums/meltdowns when they’re tired, twin 2 has accidents nearly every day. They are generally very “babyish” compared to other children their age. At pre-school they don’t actively join in on activities. I’m told they “observe”.
They’re extremely quiet, introverted kids who pretty much blank anyone who is new to them and haven’t really made any friends, although they do talk about other children at preschool. They only go in 3 days a week, but they are completely exhausted by this to the point weekends are quite often a write off.
I blame myself for this a bit… we couldn’t afford childcare for them until we had funded hours at age 3, so the preschool setting is still relatively new to them and there is a huge gulf of difference between them and other summer born kids who have been going since age 2 or before.

At home, they are quite academic in some ways. Twin 2 just did a brand new 59 piece puzzle on his own. Twin 1 can do basic multiplication and subtraction. Both have a keen interest in books, although they’re not remotely interested learning to read/write themselves.

My worry is that they won’t have the stamina for school. I’m worried they simply will not be capable of sitting at a table for long periods and learning, which will then mean they are incorrectly labelled as kids who don’t listen and that this impact their self esteem. I’ve read research on the impact of being a summer born kid and it’s sobering.

We’ve weighed up a few options, including deferring a year, starting in the Winter or Summer term or going in part time for the first term or two. I think we’ve ruled out the former options - they already have other kids they are familiar with starting in September so socially I think it would benefit them to start at the same time. We are considering sending them in 4 days a week (assuming the school allow this?). We think an extra day of rest a week at home will help them get the most out of the days they are there.

Has anyone done this and been happy with this decision? Or maybe regretted it? Or regretted not doing it?

I’d appreciate your thoughts!

Thank you ☺️

Haven’t done it but would absolutely go with my gut on this

Personally, I would defer them for a year. I think it's a no brainer with summer born twins.

I get the social point but kids this age make new friends so easily that I wouldn't make a decision that affects their educational future based on this.

You probably could agree a part time timetable for reception but it's not just about reception, will they really be ready for year 1 in a bit over a year?

I think another year of preschool would be very beneficial

Is there a reason you've ruled out deferring them until next year?

Part time sounds great, but it very rarely works. With everything you've written, their prematurity, toileting, tiredness etc I honestly think deferral is the best option.

We sent our summer born to reception at 5 this year and they've been thriving. Personally I think part time is the worst of all worlds as they miss out on things which could make their learning even more difficult. I have heard anecdotally though that the best way to do part time is to only miss afternoons because most schools do phonics and maths in the mornings, our school does indeed do this. In the early weeks they really do learn phonics at pace so missing every Friday I feel would really hinder their early phonics learning as that could be one sound missed every single week.

Personally as someone who works in an early years classroom I would either defer or send them full time. I think missing one day a week risks causing more issues than it solves especially if your concerns are about friendship and socialising.

Talk to the school about your concerns and take it from there.

Personally, I would either defer them to next year or send them full time in September.

Missing one day a week is quite a lot to miss. They learn things through repetition, and would miss some of that. They also learn routine by talking about what they're going to do on X day and Y day, and your twins may be confused when they don't get to do X or Y.

My other concern would be social. The other kids will notice that yours don't come on some days, and they remember. Probably won't remember about the "missing a day" thing, but they'll remember that your twins do different, that they miss school a lot, that they're always having to catch up on half done activities or that the teacher tweaks things for them to make their timetable work. A lot of school is about doing things as a class and fitting in with the class, and I wouldn't want to risk that.

I know kids do part time for various reasons, but I would avoid it if I possibly could, particularly as you have the option to defer if you want to.

My twins are pretty old for their year. Their whole pre-school room at nursery left and went to school, and a whole new set of kids came up to the room. They manage that just fine, in a familiar setting and with familiar staff. By summer next year they will have a whole set of new friends to join school with.

Have you asked the preschool for their view?

I debated deferring my summer born but the preschool was very clear that they thought he would be fine and he has been. They are well qualified to make these recommendations because they see so many children in this age group

A year delay I think

I’ve deferred my August born 4 year old for reasons like you’ve described. He seems younger than his peers, didn’t start nursery until 3 (due to Covid), nursery said he ‘observed’ play rather than initiates/joins in.

He’ll now start reception this September and the difference from this year to last is like night and day. He now has friends that he plays with, he has much better speech and is far less tired after nursery. I don’t regret giving him this extra year at all .

Have to agree with the consensus. My twins are in nursery going up to reception September. Missing one day a week even now would see them miss a fifth of phonics and basic maths. Next year will be the same. So then you'll be stressed trying to keep them to date. School trips etc may be on the day they miss or forest school etc.

As an aside, if you child is having accidents every day, why aren't they still in pull ups? It's not going to help them feel comfortable at nursery if they keep spoiling themselves. There's no shame in them being late toileting. No one will care once they're 10

I would absolutely defer them. My twins were born in September and it has been great for them, they were really ready for reception and thrived. Despite this however, it was exhausting for them and they were often asleep by 6pm throughout the reception year. Go with your gut.

There's not much "sitting at a desk and learning" in EYFS, from experience. Phonics and maths often are at desks but it's not for long periods. Lots of free flow learning through play, lots of carpet time, lots of free play time.
But I agree with the others who have said defer them rather than go part time.

I had Summer born premature twins - they were 4 years and 2 weeks when they started their Reception year (they should have been born at the end of October)
They would never have coped with full time school - they were very small for their age and were immature compared to their peer group - emotionally, physically, mentally etc.
They therefore attended mornings only until the following Easter when they went full time.

Unfortunately, once they then started Year 1, it was obvious that they could not cope with the 'work load' expected of them.

The headteacher was fantastic though and suggested that they repeat their whole Reception year again ......... which they did and they were a lot happier!
They are grown up now but they both said it was the best thing we could have done for them.

Not deferring because there are children they're 'familiar with' is absolute madness. Even if there were children who were their absolute best friend it would be a shortsighted decision, but for children they don't even play with?!

Part time will be the worst of both worlds.

Before you make any decisions, I think you need to find out what the probable primary school would actually facilitate. I'm assuming you have confirmed places for both of them? Have you spoken to the school? If they attend part time, what would happen at the end of reception - would they need to go into year 1 with the rest of the cohort?

This advice from Haringey is quite helpful although I don't know whether this is the national guidance or if Haringey has gone further than the national guidance. Just bear in mind that different local authorities vary and it's not unknown for them to try to enforce their own local rules (they shouldn't, but they do):

https://www.haringey.gov.uk/children-and-families/schools-and-education/school-admissions/summer-born-children-and-delaying-admission-reception#parttime

If you defer a year it looks like you may have to reapply for the places. What are admissions like in your area - is it fairly certain you'd get the same school? If you did, would their nursery keep them - have you asked and when do you have to give notice? Would you lose the funded hours, or not? Does it make any difference to you re work where they attend and the hours?

This is a short term versus long term decision and there is a lot to take into account and without a time machine, you can't know quite how it will work out.

Good luck!

My twins were born at the very end of August, due in the October.
They started school on schedule, were fine socially but struggled academically at first. They needed a little extra help. They’re now in year 2 and in the higher achieving half of the class.
I do regret not deferring them a year, I think they’d have had an easier ride. They are fine now though, it just took them a little longer to get there.

As a y1 teacher, please defer them. It’s not just about reception but the rest of their time at school, and it doesn’t sound like they will be ready for y1, especially if they only do 80% of reception. Having an extra year of pre school experience & then completing reception at 5 will give them a great foundation for the rest of their school careers.

It may also be very hard to get the school to agree to the part time arrangement you’re suggesting, as it will hammer their attendance figures (now that doesn’t matter for your dc & you need to do the right thing for them but you do also want a really good working relationship with the school).

My advice would be start talking to school & pre school about this ASAP.

I just want to pick up on a few things that other PPs have mentioned to clarify some things:

1. The school can't not 'agree' to your part-time arrangement. It's your legal right to send them PT if you want to, in whatever pattern you want to, until the term after they turn 5.
2. You can't hold on to a reception place for this year to next year. You would need to first get written agreement from the school(s) admissions authority(/ies) that they would place your child in reception rather than year 1 if they start school the term after they turn 5. Then once you've got the agreements for that, you'd have to apply for a reception place as normal for the year that you want them to start.
3. If your children don't start school until the term after they turn 5, they keep their three-year funded hours in the meantime, you just reconfirm as normal.

If you do consider sending them at 5, there is a great informative Facebook group called 'flexible school admissions for summer borns' that I would recommend.

1. The school can't not 'agree' to your part-time arrangement. It's your legal right to send them PT if you want to, in whatever pattern you want to, until the term after they turn 5.

Oh that's good to know! Mind you I have a SEN child so sadly I'm used to schools and LAs not doing things that legally they are required to...

I also think the remark that part time would "hammer the attendance" can't be right because attendance is surely only relevant for children of compulsory school age? The clue would be in the word "compulsory"?

I also thought there were some potential indicators of autism from your description of them - but at this stage, it would be difficult to know how much might be due to prematurity and lack of experience in preschool.

Another year in preschool might also be beneficial in giving more time to consider this

Part time schooling is not generally a good solution. It can be agreed but usually only for short periods eg 6 weeks ar a time, not permanently. The problem is that children are required to follow the national curriculum on the days in school and not on their days at home so with 20% less time in school they will definitely fall behind.

It's much better to get them to start a year later as the oldest pupils in the 2025 cohort. I think your reason for not deferring is very weak. There's plenty of time to get to know people with kids in the cohort that will start reception in 2025 and given that you have said they aren't really making friends yet they are not losing anything by waiting a year.

We haven’t ruled this out as a possibility but equally I feel that all of these behaviours can just be attributed to them being 3 year olds. The meltdowns are only when they are really tired (which is a lot lately) or hungry. I am autistic myself with a lot of classic behaviours (toe walking, sensory overwhelm, stimming) which my kids don’t seem to have. I don’t know. The preschool and health visitors haven’t brought it up with me but it is on our radar.

But the consensus here does seem to be wait a year! So we will talk to the preschool (not sure they’ll even still have space for them this September?) and revisit the idea as it seems we were too hasty in ruling it out.

Ex teacher here, with everything you’ve said, defer them for a year. Wouldn't recommend going for 4 days, School isn’t like nursery if they miss one day a week they are going to miss out and put them at a greater advantage for year 1.

It's may be too late to defer if they were due to go this September- that has to be done when you do your application - Jan 12th springs to mind! So it will now be at the discretion of the school and if they will only them to defer!
Which unless they have SEN may be hard to do!

I suppose we were quite hasty in ruling it out. It’s mostly that they only really talk about 2 “friends” at Preschool and both those kids will be going this year. And also I am worried they will resent us when they get to 16 and still have another year of school. I hated school so I think I would have begrudged knowing I would have been done with it a whole year earlier. Also I read that sometimes the secondary schools can decide to put them straight into year 8? Which is also a pretty awkward life stage and not ideal. Or if they get to teenagers and others find out they’ve been “held back a year” and then they get bullied for it.

But we will talk about it again - if it means that ultimately they do better in school, are happier and will potentially get better grades, better prospects etc then that’s what we’ll do.