Does DD know what she's saying??

[sabrinatheteenagewix]

DH and I are finally ready to think about TTC for number 2. Our firstborn is 2.5 years old, and she has been speaking well for awhile now.

She understands brothers and sisters and some of her friends from NCT and nursery have started to have siblings.

Every time I ask her if she wants a baby brother or sister, if she likes brothers and sisters/babies, if she would want to play with a brother or sister/baby etc. she clearly and consistently says no and she just wants her, mommy and daddy.

Does she know what she’s saying??

I only mainly want a second for her benefit! Looking to hear if anyone else has similar stories and how it turned out if you did have a second??

Why on earth are you asking her such an abstract question at her age. Of course she doesn't know. You as parents make the decision and if you do have a baby, you can help her prepare for the new arrival by speaking about it positively thrn.

She's far too young to be asked this.

Hi OP, child development is something relevant to my job so hope I can help. At 2 years old your daughter definitely won't be able to understand concepts like this at her age. She wouldn't be able to understand or weigh up the potential benefits of having a sibling (ie someone to play with, love etc) over potential costs (losing/ having to share some attention from mum and dad, maybe finances being tighter). Honestly I don't think she'd be able to actually have true insight into the ins and outs of siblings until she was a lot older, like 7 or 8 minimum.

I was also thinking if your sole consideration of having a second child is around your firstborn how would you feel if they aren't close growing up?

Agreed, don't ask this. It's not up to her obviously so don't make it feel like it is! Also you have no idea whether you'll be able to conceive again/soon (sorry - talking from experience - hope you sail through it).

No children have no clue.

Firstly, why would she want a sibling age 2, when she has 100% of mummy and daddy's attention, and are too young to be that interested in other kids.

When you ask them when they are older they imagine having someone their age to play with, not someone who will permanently be younger than them.

If you have a child to provide a sibling as a main reason just stop and think it through again.

Lots of siblings don't get on.

She won't understand what you are asking.

Also, many children if their parents have a second child are very very jealous of it. They don't like there being another contender for the love and affection that they see as theirs.

She won't necessarily react like that but many do.

The benefits of siblings (playing together etc) are mostly in older years and also mostly for you.

She is two she is saying no to you bringing home a random child. If you decide to have another do it for your reasons.

I am sure like most siblings she will love and want to sell them all within the same hour 😂

At 2 when our friends started having their number 2s my daughter had no interest in "sisters and brothers" Then she was ill around 3 and watched frozen and since then she had an imaginary brother and sister since.

It's too abstract a concept for her. At this age most children can't even make a realistic decision about what they eat and could throw a tantrum because you gave them what they asked for!

If you want another child, have another child. Don't do it "for her". Jesus that's a lot of responsibility on a toddler's shoulders. Imagine they absolutely despise each other.

What an absolutely bizarre post.

Either she doesn't understand, or she does and she's telling you she doesn't want a sibling. You should want another baby for it's own sake - not leaving the decision of whether to bring another life into the world up to a toddler.

Don’t have another child (or indeed any child) for any reason other than that you want one.

Why are you asking a two year old this? It is up to you and your partner. If course she doesn't know.