Potty training without chocolate buttons?

[ViaRia01]

I’ve heard a few times recently that bribing child with a chocolate button for every successful attempt on the potty is good approach to potty training.

I’m just wondering whether anyone has found that it didn’t work for them or it wasn’t necessary as the child was just ready and willing to use the potty without bribery?

I’m not totally against the chocolate buttons but is it necessary? Is it fool-proof? I’m usually quite laid back I think but I have to admit I’m a bit daunted by the idea of potty training!

It's a while back but I think it was a combination of stickers, ink hand stamps and smarties, but they only worked because the children were ready.

For context, our first attempt was when the DC was not ready. No amount of bribery would work. He just didn't get it.

I never bribed my dc with anything. When they were ready they just potty trained, it wasn't complicated for them.

I recognise this is not true for all dc, but it can happen.

DS1 it did not work at all. One ASD diagnosis later and his continued aversion to chocolate goes a long way to explaining that. So it was stickers towards what he really wanted. DS2 it was buttons all the way and a million times less taxing. I recommend buttons. And when the potty training is done you may find half a pack in your handbag just when you yourself want a treat…

It depends on the child. Both of mine did it without bribery. I now have a grand daughter who is so absorbed in whatever she’s doing that bribery is needed. It’s a choc button or a sticker for her and it works really well.

Haha we used iced gems and those little tiny yoghurt drop things. Pretty sure it wasn’t in our pre baby parenting plan but it worked fine!

We tried it for bribery when it felt like everything else was failing and honestly, I'd didn't get him to do it any quicker so stopped. He would ask for a button or smartie after he'd been but still wasn't 'ready', looking back and I don't think he understood the whole bribe thing. When we eventually cracked it we used stickers but it didn't feel like bribery, he just enjoyed putting a sticker on a piece of paper and seeing how many wees he had done in total and it was more of a visual tool/reward tracker I suppose for him to see how well he was doing.

I would say though that smarties etc were given after a successful use of the potty/toilet. They acted as a reward.
Bribes would happen before the event - very different IMO 😉

We used a sticker chart but it wasn't bribery. Son got to add one to the chart for each completed action like washing his hands or flushing the toilet etc. It was more about cementing the routine of going to the toilet in his mind as I asked him about each step as we stuck the sticker to the chart.

Worked for DS. Did not work for DD as she learned to manipulate it and let out tiny drops of wee every 10 minutes to ensure she got the whole pack within the hour 😂 Still did bribery though- 3 stickers on her chart (when not manipulating the situation she’s an infrequent pee-er) and she could have ice cream after dinner.

Same, we started just before his 2nd birthday and he was reliably dry in the day after a few weeks and at night (I know this is hormonal as we did absolutely nothing towards night dryness and were a bit shocked tbh) within 3 months.

We just went for it, naked from the waist down, prompting, plonking him on if needed. Lots of watching for ques and noticing how long he'd typically go between wees etc. He wasn't bothered by stickers and I was worried by offering chocolate he'd glue himself to the damn thing 🤣 We'd read to him if he needed to sit and poo to keep him from immediately getting up.

Our only problem was he was scared of public loos for absolutely ages so we spent longer than ideal carrying around a portable potty and looking for discreet places he could go while out and about 😬

One of my DC just trained by us having the potty out a lot and one day she did a wee on it and got the idea: when we were ready to go I’d get her to sit in it every couple of hours until she would say when she needed it.
Second DC not keen at all so we did chocolate buttons for 3-4 days; childminder did stickers with same outcome

DS was 3 and showing absolutely no signs of being interested in the potty so we dedicated one weekend to the process including incentives and then just carried on without from the Monday. DD decided herself just turned 2 that she was using the toilet so no incentives necessary beyond choosing knickers she wanted.

I’ve toilet trained 3 children and have never used a chocolate button! Not that I’m against it, I just didn’t need to. One was trained at 2.5 years, one at 20 months and one (autistic son) at 3.5 years.

I think they all do it by themselves by 3.5yrs. I did try potty training early on on the potty (as I felt pressure to do so) but gave up and then it happened all by itself on the toilet. I do recommend a sturdy stool and a inbuilt toilet seat (one with adult and toddler lids combined).

I love bribing with buttons and use that method for loads of things! But didn't need it at all with potty training. The 'oh crap' book method worked like a dream

We are offering stickers, with special character stickers for poos. To be honest on the times I forgot stickers she didn't ask for them so doesn't appear too fussed about about them... the over top celebration about using the potty however she gets very excited about and looks to me or her dad for loud cheering, clapping etc everytime she does it so I think in hindsight she may have done it without stickers :)

We didn't use anything like that with DD1 - no sticker chart, chocolate buttons etc.

Not because we have anything against it, we'd have used it if we thought it necessary (and we may well use it for DD2 who we'll be potty training soon), but we didn't need to.

I tried the first time without bribery. It was a complete failure, he wasn't interested and didn't get it. Tried again three months later (just turned 3) with a special sticker chart and chocolate buttons, and it worked... took a week to do it by himself and lots of accidents for about six months after, but it did work.

I'm a big fan of bribery in parenting now 😂

In my experience the children who do it by themselves are younger siblings who want to copy brothers and sisters.

I've potty trained three children all between 2 and 2.5 without using any rewards/bribery.

I just explain what they need to do and let them get on with it. No cajoling, no reminding them, I just let them work it out. I have strong willed children and anything else would turn it into a power struggle.

Never bribed mine, and she was potty trained by 2 years 2 months.

I simply made up a little song, "Well done baby," and we did a little singing together when she used a potty. She was so proud of herself, no stickers or other reward needed - but I definitely wouldn't have used chocolate or any other type of food. They should learn how to use it (and they will) and not because they want something in exchange.

Isn't there a risk of Pavlovian Conditioning here, whereby the appearance of a chocolate button will trigger the desire to go to the toilet?

Think what could happen when the child has grown up and is at, say, a corporate 'do' or, God forbid, their wedding and a dessert turns up garnished with chocolate buttons? It doesn't bear thinking about! 😱

We didn't use chocolate buttons or any bribery for the initial potty training.

We did use a sticker chart but that was after she understood how to use the potty, but was just too lazy/distracted to go before she had an accident: we were nagging her to go which was just making it worse so positive re-enforcement with stickers and a small present at the end worked much better.

They're all different and different things will work better for each child. With or without bribes they'll get there in the end, but for some children bribes make it quicker/easier.

😂

Jelly tots did it for us. One for a wee and two for a poo - beware the intelligent child who works out that you can poo in instalments and get more jelly tots!!

When you look at it from the child's point of view, they have been happily trolling through their life without having to stop what they are doing for a wee/poo, and now all of a sudden it has all changed - they do need a bit of an incentive, and if Jelly tots/chocolate buttons do the trick then why not?

None of my children were still needing a jelly tot to go to the loo when they were 16!

I potty trained both of ours in 3 days each using milky way stars.

Happy to brag about this as I was useless at weaning them or ever getting them to sleep - despite trying every method under the sun, so potty training was the one area of parenting I rocked. What I'm really saying is I suspect toddlers do what they do when they are ready and if that coincides with your attempts, it feels like success.

But I'd give chocolate buttons a go. If it's that quick and easy and they aren't used to having sweets, it could take the hassle out of a messy process.