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15 week old always cries to fall asleep, help!

11 replies

ThatPeachHedgehog · 19/04/2024 20:51

Hello, my DS (15 weeks) for probably the past 6/7 weeks only falls asleep after a bout of intense crying (from a minute or two up to 15 minutes), for both naps and his evening sleep, despite being on me being comforted. He's always rocked or fed to sleep (which I'm fine with doing for now, I'll start some gentle sleep training in a month or two). Usually the evening one is the worst. For day naps I'll mostly put him in the carrier and go for a walk outside and he'll fall asleep pretty quickly after a little cry which is easier. Sometimes he'll fall asleep peacefully on the boob, but sometimes he gets thrashy and cries (especially in the evening) so this doesn't always work. It's almost like he doesn't like the feeling of falling asleep? He'll cry and then will suddenly be asleep. I've experimented with wake windows, but it doesn't seem to make a difference. He gets around 3-5 hours of sleep during the day. Night wakes are fine, he'll just feed then go straight back to sleep peacefully. I've also tried just putting him down in the cot for day naps in case he finds being on me too much but that didn't help either. He seems so upset and I find it really difficult mentally that holding him doesn't help! He's a really happy chap when he's awake. I'd just so love for him to fall asleep peacefully, but maybe that's just not his thing? Has anyone got any experience of this? Will he grow out of it? If so when did that happen for you? Sorry for the long post!!

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
cheeseandketchupsandwich · 19/04/2024 20:59

Could he be overtired?

ThatPeachHedgehog · 19/04/2024 21:07

@cheeseandketchupsandwich I thought that, but I've experimented with wake windows and it doesn't seem to make a difference. If anything it feels like he's crying saying 'nooooo don't put me to sleep I want to stay up!' as he only starts when I start to get him off to sleep. He's generally awake around 1.25-1.5 hours between naps

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cheeseandketchupsandwich · 19/04/2024 21:11

Hmm, my other suggestion was going to be let him stay awake abit longer and see how he gets on.

I read something some time ago which helped, in that the first nap of the day will be after a shorter wake window and the wake windows will extend (slightly) throughout the day.

My DD around that time started settling herself so we just laid her down and laid next to her. She'd babble for abit and then fall asleep. Could you try that?

Honestly, it could be any number of things. I understand it isn't nice for you as mum, but he will stop and it will get better I promise xx

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ThatPeachHedgehog · 19/04/2024 21:18

@cheeseandketchupsandwich thank you so much for the kind message. Sometimes just a bit of support on here helps so much! I'll give that a go this weekend (laying him down and laying next to him) although I've a feeling he'll stay awake and then get himself overtired. Thank you x

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cheeseandketchupsandwich · 19/04/2024 21:19

No worries, and good luck!

You said yourself he's a happy chappy when awake. You're doing great x

FirstT1meMum · 20/04/2024 06:40

4 month DD does exactly the same. Its horrible but I'm the same idk how to stop it. Car trios help and sometimes she does drift off but I'm not sure what the difference us yet!

Wedontopenyet · 20/04/2024 06:42

Both of my children were like this . I think some just are .

ThatPeachHedgehog · 20/04/2024 09:46

@Wedontopenyet thank you for your reply, what age did you find that it stopped?

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ThatPeachHedgehog · 20/04/2024 09:48

@FirstT1meMum aww it's so difficult isn't it. You feel like you're doing something wrong, I've spoken to quite a few friends now who've experienced a similar thing and I think it might just be some babies way of getting everything out, but that doesn't make it easier. Will let you know if I find a magic solution! You'll be doing an amazing job x

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Wedontopenyet · 20/04/2024 10:02

ThatPeachHedgehog · 20/04/2024 09:46

@Wedontopenyet thank you for your reply, what age did you find that it stopped?

Maybe 7 months ish? Whenever I stopped rocking them to sleep.

Koptforitagain · 20/04/2024 10:08

It’s my understanding that this is actually a normal pattern of behaviour. Our sleep specialist said it’s far more natural than some of the batshit crazy things we were doing. We’d got it into our heads that we should never let a baby cry, so we were jiggling, juggling, rocking, offering the breast, cuddling, hoovering, car riding, etc. The specialist said to just let him settle himself and that we were turning the poor baby into a nervous wreck.

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