How do I reduce grandparents overindulgence?

[Bouldersandrocks]

I would never want to come across as ungrateful or jeopardise family relationships but I feel I have a dilemma on my hands.
Please could I have some advice or experiences which could help me find some way to approach this!
I have two preschool children who see grandparents regularly. Whenever they come back from spending time with them, they return with multiple material gifts - magazine, toys, chocolates, clothing, colouring books etc.
Whilst at first, I thought this was lovely, I have now realised that my children are being overindulged and it has spoilt their nature. They will frequently ask for presents as soon as they see the grandparents, before even saying hello. They will turn their noses up if the present is not the one they wanted. When I take them out myself, they pester me to buy them things and are not even happy or excited on the odd occasion that I purchase said item. It really feels ‘easy come, easy go’
When I was younger, I wasn’t spoilt with material items. I would love going shopping with my Mum and occasionally I would be thrilled to be bought some beautiful colouring pens. I absolutely treasured them.
I feel the showering of all these gifts have devalued them, my children don’t appreciate the items and are straight to the next.
I really want my children to be motivated to work hard, determined to strive for things. But it seems that this constant buying of treats is detrimental to them. They now have an expectation for gifts rather than any appreciation of them.
As their parent I feel I have no leverage to advocate good behaviour with a reward system. For example, once every two months or so I would treat my son to a magazine for working hard at preschool. But now, when I look at the shop shelves, it’s hard to find a magazine that he hasn’t already been given. Magazines are no longer seen as a special treat. It’s so disheartening.
It really feels that my toes are being stepped on but how can I ask grandparents to stop doing this without coming across as ungrateful or nasty? The showering of gifts is just excessive!

I had this with my in laws they either go all out or he come back with nothing. They created expectations over the years but this year for Christmas didn’t buy him what he normal has and stopped a traditional gift which me and DH have had to end up getting ourselves. My DS goes FIL with clothes and they don’t get warn as she spoilers him with all clothes which never come back home with him which he soon grow out off. In laws earn a lot more then us but we try our best for our DS and it’s not nice to fell upstaged . My DS is not daft and knows which relative will give him what when he stays with them.

My mum spoils my children but they are also taught by my mum and us that they need to have manners and that they are very lucky and how to be grateful, even if it's something small....if they were to turn their nose up then said gift would be removed, same if they don't say thank you etc......as a child I was "spoilt" but I always had manners and always taught I need to work hard and how hard my parents worked to give me lots of things....."things" don't have to turn someone into a brat....it's how just bring them up

he is right, they aren't going to be around forever and i'd be tempted to just put up with it and let them indulge. Maybe ask them to tone it down slightly.

I would talk to them. Focus on how you've noticed your kids being rude and asking for presents when they see granny etc
So you can say how grateful you are but outline your concern and ask for their help in tackling it

Ah we have exactly the same! My dd is 5 and walks in my pil's demanding her suprise! If there isnt one then she sulks. Dh did approach this a while back and explained she is expecting this elsewhere, when we are out ect. And that we had introduced a sticker chart for her to earn treats and would rather they supported this.
However were back to square one. My pil's are the type that are 'dont tell me what to do' so its a loosing battle.
I now think that its pretty sad if they feel they need to 'buy' her but thats thier problem.
My new problem is that its mostly cheap tat now (not saying theres anything wrong with that) and comes home with her (as if i need more crap in my house!) So im now starting to bag it up and send it back explaining that we dont have the space for it all so its best it stays there hoping that they then realise its pointless.
My parents do buy things, but in moderation and check with us before doing so

it's a tough one. I would ask them to reduce a bit if they can rather than stop. Find a comfy middle ground. Like the idea of asking for a bank account or experiences instead of material treats. Some are ok but not too many.

I think a frank conversation that whilst you are really appreciative of how much they love are care about them, could they please limit gifts as your children are becoming ungrateful. Suggest a small chocolate bar (finger of fudge or Freddo sized) is ok perhaps a magazine monthly, but they really don't need more. Then say you have savings accounts for both children and you want to start getting them to save half of the money they are given for when they are older eg driving lessons.

I did this with my family and rather than over indulge at Christmas they would get £50/100 put into their accounts, it really helps when you only get the minimum maintenance loan!