10 year old son has been dropped by his entire friend group.

[MM1972]

Our ten year old son has been dropped by everyone in his friend group. It started with one boy being nasty and excluding him now one by one they all are (4 other boys). They had been having sleepovers etc but now he isn't invited and he says that if he attempts to speak to them in the playground they point him out to each other and walk away. One of them had bullied his best friend who then left the school.
He does speak to other boys in the other P7 class and socializes with his older brothers friends.
He is chatty and friendly and I hope he stays this way and it doesn't shatter his confidence.
None of the boys are going to the same secondary school next year.
I can't think that he would have done anything to justify this.

Is he P7 and going to secondary in 12 weeks or presumably 10 and still in P6?

God how unpleasant OP, and thank goodness they aren’t going to the same secondary.

Speak to the school, the kids need to be put straight, and their parents need to know. In the meantime concentrate on helping him build other friendship groups so his confidence doesn’t fall - it always helps to have more than one.

Yes going to secondary school in September.

Are you sure he’s 10? (Or am I taking you saying “the other P7 class”) out of context?

if you’ve only got until the summer holidays to deal with this I’d be trying to big him up in whatever way you can. Could you plan something with the boys in the other class?

One of the kids has a teacher at the school. She said she had spoken to her son who denied anything was wrong and she believed him.
The school did nothing for the earlier bullying incident which resulted in our son's friend leaving.

Hi
just for some context I’m a secondary school assistant headteacher who oversees behaviour, pastoral care and safeguarding.

I’ve seen this happen many a times and it’s a really tricky one to deal with. It would be classed as bullying due to them attempting to isolate your son but as a school although they will have a bullying policy policies rarely take the child’s wishes, feelings and ultimately best interests into account. Let’s say for example the children were punished, this doesn’t make your son feel any better or gain him these friendships back. It may result in your son needing to speak to various members of staff etc which he may find difficult or actually not want to do.

from experience, if he were my child I would focus on building him up, reassuring him that friendships change and he’ll make great new friends when he goes to secondary, encourage him to spend time with the others and ignore the behaviours of those who have turned on him if he can. Sometimes kids can be cruel with no cause and also at 10 they will not fully understand the effect their behaviour has on your son. If you know their parents I may mention it to them in a more of a ‘do you know what’s happened between jimmy and Charlie’ way than a ‘your Jimmy has done this to Charlie’ parents tend to be defensive and I’ve found it much more beneficial if things are worked through as a partnership.

that’s just my opinion! I hope your son is okay, he clearly has a Mother who cares a great deal :)

Sorry he is 11.

This has happened to my son , he had them all over for the first sleepover they all had a great time , then a few months later they have a sleepover without my son . The kids and I’ve noticed the parents don’t really speak to me anymore either . They seem to have just dropped him and he doesn’t know what he’s done. Doesn’t help one of the moms is queen bee of pta and the other works in the afterschool club so their kids can do no wrong, I’ve been working on building his confidence and letting him invite other friends over but now the original kids are trying to take these other kids away from my son. We have two years left and I’m hoping he will get over it and move on but It’s so sad seeing his little face, he’s trying to be brave and make friends with others but he has been really hurt by these kids