Advice from parents who had their kids at their wedding

[Mumssupportingmums]

Hello all,

this probably is a stupid post, but I am getting married in two months and we’ve decided to bring our son to the wedding, he will be 3 then and my niece 4.

We wanted him to be a part of our day because it’s special, however we are under no illusion that he is a sensitive soul and is rather clingy and emotional, especially to me.

i am worried this may overwhelm me on an already overwhelming day as I have been dreaming of this day my whole life! But we did things unconventionally and had my little boy first.

anyway, any advice on ways to keep kids entertained or happy throughout day? How was your experiences etc? Xx

Paid a very experienced event nanny who met the kids 3 times before. She was a wonder ad the kids were able to take part in bits of the ceremony and go run around outside when needed. The baby needed a nap during the meal so she was walking the pram outside. Cost £250 and was the best spend of the wedding we both agreed

Ditto the above. Not my wedding but friends, they hired 3 nannies who took care of all the children in an adjacent area.

Is there another family member he’s close to who can support you and look after him when you need to be doing other things?

Maybe put together a little pack of treats for him and your niece with a mix of things to do- some active and some quiet- to help them through the day eg sticker book or magic painting they can take off to a quiet corner (with someone to supervise) when it gets too much. It’s a long day for little ones.

Agree you need someone who your son is really familiar with to it with him during the ceremony. Might help to play "wedding" at home first a bit too - play walking down the aisle, music, someone talking, etc, so go know exactly what to expect.

One wedding I went to that had young children at had a reading of a very short story about two dinosaurs who really loved each other getting married which was a lovely touch.

Another friend at a different wedding where lots of children were invited have all the kids a little party bag of coloured pencils and paper and a small drawing am puzzle book when they arrived at the sit down meal to help entertain them.

Also ideally have a venue where the kids can go somewhere and run around when they get bored or just need to burn off some energy without interrupting speeches etc.

Finally - bribery. Took my DS to my DBs wedding at age 3 and promised him that if he was good all day he could get a present that he'd chosen in advance (large tonka truck) the next day when we arrived home if he behaved well through the whole thing. I also had a packed of rice crackers with me which I quietly fed him one at a time during the ceremony.

My daughter was a bit older but we invited a whole table’s worth of kids and had lots of things for them to do / play with. We hardly saw them!

A wedding I went to recently had the child's nursery key worker there for the day.

Otherwise I'd say activity packs for during speeches and make sure the food you serve is universally child appropriate. Just because your child likes grown up good, doesn't mean others do and there will be tears!

Have a dress you can bend down to lift him up in. Get someone to take his shoes off and baby wipes to avoid sticky fingers but let him be lifted up by you and not kept away by well meaning relations. Let him come to the practice thing for the ceremony and give him a role. Make everything a bit quicker!

My DD was 3 when we got married, for the ceremony we made her a little activity pack (actually she sat beautifully through it on her big sister's lap). After the ceremony we paid for 2 staff members from her nursery to come along and they played with her and our friend's kids so we could all relax. My mum took her home with her about 9 (we didn't have a hotel as we were glamping). We had lots of lovely moments with her but ensured that we weren't having to do lots of active parenting that day.