Help with crying of multiples

[Firsttimemultiplemammy]

I am a single mother of 16 week old triplets (4 weeks corrected). I’m hoping for any tips on how to deal with the crying and whinging when all 3 are doing it together.
How can I soothe all 3? How do I decide who to go to first? How can I keep calm when all 3 are doing it together?

Oh wow! Hats off to you. That sounds really difficult. Do you have any support at all? Any family nearby?

I had twins and a partner and found that full on!

I have nothing to offer here except admiration for you if they all stay fed and just clean enough. I hope you are getting some help and I guess you are in touch with The Twins Trust https://twinstrust.org/

You are an amazing woman. I didn't have triplets but had 3 under 2. I used to put them in the car and drive until they all fell asleep then would park up wherever we were and have a nap/ret myself.
There were loads of times when more than one was crying and I tried to switch which one I went to first so it felt "fair". But there was lots of unattended crying. They are all perfectly lovely and well adjusted teens so did them no harm!

I have no advice, I'm sorry. But I didn't want to read and run.
You can only do what you can do, at this point if they are clean and fed then you are genuinely smashing it.
A single mum to triplets is an extremely tough situation, my only advice would be don't be afraid to ask for as much help as you possibly can (I really hope you have some out there).
And please be really kind to yourself, so many mums feel so much guilt about not being able to give more, you can't do miracles, and sometimes those babies will have to cry and it's not your fault.
❤️

Triplets?! Oh my gosh!

I have no advice but I wish you the absolute best

Well done! You are doing a great job already! I had only twins but had rocking chairs together so you could hold one and make the other chair rock with your foot while you got to the next one. With triplets if you had 3 chairs in a line you could hold one and rock the other 2 chairs with your feet! You might be able to get some support from a charity? My Auntie signed up to help people with new babies for a couple of hours a week through sure start. I don't know if any initiatives like that are still around. Also sometimes babies just have to cry they will all be OK and it won't do them any harm to have to wait for a while. Xxxx

In addition, if you have to leave them crying for a few minutes while you leave the room to keep yourself calm....that is fine, don't feel guilty. It's important that you allow yourself time to regain patience. When my DD had colic I had to do this, and she's been unaffected.

I have a very supportive family who are already doing so much to help out but I am still struggling. I never thought it would be this hard. It the chorus of cries and whinges that I am really struggling with. One triplet is very needy and will not allow me to put him down during the day which does not help the situation

I've got no useful advice in how to manage 3 babies, but I've got advice on how to help your ears! Get some ear defenders, as it will block out some of the noise and take the edge off. Our own babies cries are meant to set off our instincts so dampening that down might help you to be able to get on with doing what you need to do, without making you so distressed.

The old style army ones are really good.

What @DimLlaeth said- a 'gentle parenting' lady where I used to live told me to put ear plugs in to diminish the panic feeling of the wailing, and then work it out from there. Your stress levels fly at the sound of the wails.
Plus also all the gadgets you can lay your hands on for rocking/ soothing the others.
Mine loved white noise which our aircon provided but there are machines for it. I find it soothing myself now after all these years of it 😂
Good luck 💕

A bit different as I had twins and a toddler as a single parent. Just know your doing your best and it will not always be this hard.
Things that helped me were, a sling (1 in sling, 1 under each arm, safe spaces to leave them, routines (waking them at the same time, feeding, changing them etc), didn't rock them to sleep (as you can't do all at the same time I got my twins settled in the same cot and just sat with them), lower your standards (they can wear clothes for several days, they don't need a bath everyday), you can leave them to cry If their safe and you need to do something/see to one of them, bouncy chairs are great to keep them upright after a feed. Have a bag packed at all times to leave the house (and repack when you get home) when it gets bad pop them all into the pushchair and just walk they may settle but if they don't at least you've had some fresh air and will help you. I often did this in absolute tears but it helped. As soon as they're old enough strict bed time routine and get everyone (including yourself in bed at 8pm).
Could you also ask your health visitor for support? Local colleges often want placements for students and also they may have support workers that can help.
Most of all look after yourself in whatever way you can.