Your experience of having 3 children

[boonr]

A part of me wants a third child.

I don't think we'd ever go though with it for a number of reason, but would like to hear people's experiences of having a third child?

As in .. do you ever regret having a 3rd because it makes everything so much more difficult etc

She is very much a joy our number 3.
No regrets.

Never ever regret it, infact so far he's been my easiest child (11, 14 and 19 now). The initial 13 weeks were difficult because he had colick and was up till 3am crying every night and I was deliriously tired then had to get up go do nursery and school runs etc but after that it's all been straight forward and I've not found three difficult at all.

I’ve loved having 3. They’re grown up now 22, 27 and 28, but have always got on. We’ve only had a 3 bedroom house, so 2 have always shared, but it didn’t cause any problems. They’re girl, boy, girl by the way.

You won't get honest answers as no one is going to want to admit they regret their child

3 here. All grown up. Been great for us BUT it’s the most inconvenient family size 🤣. The world ain’t designed for a families of 5.
also watch your age gaps. 2 x2yr gaps and you may all di of the stress of A levels and GCSES at the same time - and it happens twice 😱

My third has been my easiest child provably because they just have to slot in! It is busy though, my kids are 6,5 and 3

Mine are 5, 2 and 3 months and I’m quite tired 🫠 but just about surviving. It’s amazing though and we all adore the baby. She gets ignored quite a lot though poor thing 😂 and I feel like I don’t get much time just to spend with her alone. But overall loving it. I can only manage it though because my DH is extremely hands on, the only way he could do more with them would be to become a SAHD. He also has a very flexible work schedule and does most school drop offs and lots of pick ups too at the moment.

Hmm it depends on so many factors- what your personality is like, what your children are like, age gaps, family dynamics, family support, finances. I was on the fence about having a third but we went for it as I really wanted a girl after having 2 boys. I obviously love my daughter to death and am glad I’ve got her but 3 children is a lot in this day and age!
There’s a lot of pressure to be doing things/ holidays/ clubs/ trips all the time and it’s much harder with 3 than 2. I spend a lot of time dragging 2 kids around to activities for one of them. I find the chaos and noise overwhelming a lot of the time, it’s difficult to give one to one attention to any of them and my oldest is sen so I do feel guilty that I’m taking away something from him and his needs.
Financially it does a make a big difference and probably the difference between having a certain type of lifestyle. What would have been a week abroad at half term is probably now a haven holiday for example.
For me it’s been the final nail in my career coffin as well.
I know I sound hugely pessimistic but I do have moments when they’re all having a sleepover in one room or they seem like a little gang and I feel happy that they’ve always got each other.

Thank you @Phopet. This is what I needed to hear to be honest 🤣.

If I think with my heart, I would definitely have another one, but when I think with my head, I know it's ridiculous (for all the reasons you have suggested & more)!!

Wish I had more money, a bigger house and didn't have to do nights with a newborn baby. I'm sick to death of going to kids parties and all of the activities they do. I can barely cope with 2, so perhaps 3 not a great idea 🤣

Mine are now 11, 9 and 7. I’ve said this before on threads about 3 children that I love my little one with all my heart and he makes our family complete in a way that it wasn’t before. But, if I knew then what I know now I would have stopped at 2.

i would say that things have become significantly easier in the last 12-18 months though.

Mine are 3, 2 and 6 mo, so don't have the long haul view, but I've no regrets (and am sort of in a similar position to you OP in that my heart pines for a fourth, but I know that's not a good idea). No regrets over having 3, my older girls adore their younger brother and he's their big doll! Slightly nervous about going back to work in a month and surviving full time work with it all, but in a couple of years it will get easier......

I have a 6yr old and 4yr old twins. It's tough. 3 children was never the plan, and I think because we didn't have the choice it's made appreciating things a lot harder! PP nailed when she said a family of 5 is an awkward number, nothing in the UK is set up for families larger than 4, child care costs are crippling, and being out numbered is difficult. It's so very expensive. I dread feeding 3 teenaged mouths! Our house is far more noisy and chaotic than I like but triple cuddles can balance things out (sometimes!)

It's slowly getting better as everyone gets older, but just be aware that even if you want one more you might get two or more!

I have three. On a bad day I feel absolutely exhausted and dream about what it would be like to have no children. It’s not just three children as individuals which wears me out, it’s the dynamic between them. The noise. The arguing. The mess. On a good day I love having three and actually wish we had five. I love that they have each other and are kind and loving towards each other and will have each other long after I’m gone. But I think I was a better parent to just one child. Whilst love grows which each child you have, resources, including money and time (and for me patience) doesn’t.

I think it depends on your reasons for wanting a third as well- I obviously didn’t do it for the greatest reason and I don’t think I would have had 3 in other circumstances. If you really love and enjoy motherhood and you feel like you would enjoy having more then I would go for it.

A previous line manager blamed the third child for his divorce.

Love it! 5,7 & 9! Just adore it! No.3 makes us all glue together!

There's a meme for this.
"Two kids is two kids but three kids is fifteen'
🤣
Lone parent to three, it's great and I wouldn't change it

No regrets but the littlest one gets left out a lot. It’s tough for her as she’s desperate to do what the older ones do

I have 3 with a 3 year gap then a 2 year gap. At one point they were doing uni finals, A levels and GCSEs. It was a very tense time.

I've never regretted 3, in fact I sometimes wish I'd had 4.

I have a 9,7&6 year old. My youngest was not planned but she is the most sweetest child ever. She very much is the most affectionate and showers her older brother and sister with love, cuddles and outright tells them she loves them and to show her love back lol I have no regrets. All 3 of my kids are very much a blessing. My plan was to have 2 children and that's it but having a third is great it's made our family complete, now when I look back for me personally 2 would have made me think they're both a little lonely and 3 has made things "busy" but in a good way where they aren't so lonely now and have someone else there for them. I am in 2 minds for number 4 now. It was never the plan but I do contemplate it.

That made me chuckle.
I'm also a lone parent to three : 10, 8 and 6.5. Feel the same as you it’s great they are a little team and my youngest brought us all so much happiness at an otherwise frankly horrible time.