I have a son who is 13 with a diagnosis of ASD. Always has had a loving relationship with his dad, although his dad has always shared too many of his problems on him which has made my son feel guilty for speaking about his own problems. We have been separated since pre birth of our son. Around 2 years ago he met and quickly got pregnant with a woman, who now has a 6 month old baby. She moved in straight away after 6 months and it all happened very quickly for our son. Up until 2 months ago, apart from there being quite aggressive arguing in front of my son he would go to his dads for the weekend. One weekend a couple of months ago my ex's new gf got drunk and got very aggressive with the dad, my son intervened and she started on him, following him around the house yelling and screaming at him. It scared him to death and his dad too, so much so that they had to leave the house late at night and stay elsewhere. She does drink a lot by the sounds of things I've picked up on. Now he wont go ( cant go) to his dads, at both his own and my doing as its clearly not safe, his dad is making hardly any effort to see him and he feels dreadful all the time. How can i help him? I've been nice up to now, waiting for her apology, they've cancelled two meetings to sort things out. I feel so angry myself too at the fact that this person has ruined my sons relationship with his dad, i know its not just her doing as his dad decided to settle down with her, but i feel alot of anger towards them both and so does my son! what can i do to support him and what can i do to keep him safe? At the moment if he sees his dad for an hour all he does is try to coerce him into seeing his gf/unblocking her and making up, without me present which is what he has asked for to feel safe, or hes being guilt tripped about causing so much hassle for his dad and how depressed he has been etc etc by his dads family. its just dreadful. My son is desperately sad.
Rebecca x