Nursery keeps complaining about my nonverbal child

[Mummymummama]

Hello mms,
I need some mummy advice. My 2 1/2 year old son’s nursery complains that he does not want to sleep, runs around the room and screams. He seems to like nursery and walks straight in.

Almost everyday I pick him up from nursery I get complaints. I wake him up at 6am just so he could sleep at nursery, sometimes he does and sometimes not. I have arranged to see a health visitor and he would be starting speech therapy soon. However it’s so stressful hearing how he behaved almost everyday.

Unfortunately I am studying full time so he has to attend nursery five days. I am looking forward to finishing in June so that I could change his nursery or shorten his days. How can I cope till then.

It is considered nonverbal as he should be saying more words for his age. Yes it seems when in crowded environments

The napping is really not the main issue.

What is "the Local Authority's SEN list"? Nursery should be making regular observations and tracking the development of the children in their care. It sounds like the LA have already had to remind them of their obligations here. They should be identifying areas where he is not making expected progress and should have an SEN support plan in place once they've identified that's what he needs. If they think your son needs an EHCP with funding, the LA will require them to prove that they have ascertained that DS's needs cannot be met from the regular nursery budget. That means they need to have followed correct processes and documented their evidence. In our LA, the nursery must follow Graduated Approach. I believe this is the case nationwide but you'd need to check.

We are a bit further down potentially the same road as you. All I can say is that when you have a child with additional needs and/or developmental delays, you need to be totally clued up on how the system works and the obligations of the setting your child attends. Because there's a likelihood that you will be the one driving to get the support that your child needs. Don't expect that it will just happen, unfortunately.

the list is to apply for support and what I believe will be an EHCP plan

Struggling in a noisy, busy environment but not in a quiet, calm on where he has the undivided attention of a parent wouldn’t be unusual in something like autism.

Also he may be able to make eye contact with you, as a parent, but not others.

No they don’t. They used a book in baby room but stop once children get to toddler room

Definitely keep on at the nursery about the naps - I had the same with my daughter's nursery in London, so it's definitely a thing. She had completely dropped her nap by about 20 months, but they wouldn't move her into the older room due to staff ratios for lunch, so they tried to force her to lie down in the dark with the others and then would complain to me about her screaming and getting cross. Eventually they let her play in a corner with books and things but it took a lot of discussion. We moved house and it wasn't an issue at her new nursery, they just put her in the next room for nap time. Regarding speech, it's not many words, but I've known toddlers who had very few words at that age who did catch up, so it might not necessarily be SEN, but definitely speak to your HV about getting some speech therapy if you're concerned. Good luck.

My eyestrain didn't sleep much, and didn't really speak until 3 ish, when he just spoke in sentences. We knew he understood, he was just busy being a very active kid. Physically he was often ahead of his age. By the time he went to school he was at the same stage as everyone else.
Son 3 hated noisy environments. Like seriously hated them. At home, he was funny, communicated at very young age, bright and living. Out and about, he cried a lot because of noise and sensory overload.
The good news is, now aged 24 and 17, they are both functioning, successful, gents.
I'd suggest getting your child to bed earlier, 8/9pm and then upmagain atb6am isn't enough for a toddler. Mine were always in bed by 7pm. If they are tired, I found they wouldn't go for a nap as they got beyond tired.
I'd also ask.the nursery what measures they're taking to help calm your son, so even if he won't sleep, he can have down time.
Kids are absorbing so much, it's little wonder they sometimes process it all differently.

Thank you so much everyone for your kind suggestions. I really appreciate it.

It’s really good that he is going to be assessed by a speech therapist…my dd was referred around this age by the nursery as they were concerned about her lack of speech development but she was just slow in developing and perhaps some elements of anxiety ( we’ve had a very late diagnosis of ADHD and I don’t think we understood her sensory issues at that age). The SLT will perhaps get an idea of whether he has indicators for ND…I don’t know at what age selective mutism can start but it’s interesting that he is verbal at home but not at nursery.

You need to find a nursery with a better senco team, this behaviour would not be an issue where i work a staff member would take him to the sensory room or garden while the rest slept.