Are my family being unreasonable

[mumspiration1997]

Hi. We are heading to London for Easter week. My family who never do anything together all of a sudden are going on a day out and overnight stay with the grandparents siblings and grandchildren. Am i being unreasonable to be annoyed when they knew we were away

For context I have a 6 year old son who would love a day out with his cousins

You’re upset that you’ve decided to go away on a trip - lovely. But now the rest of your family have decided to go on a different trip without? What was it you would have preferred they did instead?

Eh... wait until everyone is available perhaps?

My fear is that they done this on purpose the only time we weren't available

Yes, you are unreasonable to be annoyed. It is not unreasonable to plan a visit to someone without asking everyone in the extended family if they want to go.

Maybe they did, and they are entitled to. People can choose who to spend time with.

What is your relationship like generally? Are there any issues between siblings or cousins?

YABU. They have chosen a time when people are most likely to be available, children off school etc. If you expect them to rearrange for a time when you and everyone else are available again, it’ll never happen!

I guess there’s a fair back story here but on the face of it, you’re being a bit unreasonable to expect everyone else, who can go on those dates, to work around you and your family, who cannot. I’d be disappointed if it were me but it is what it is really.

Well it's my sister who arranged it and everyone is afraid of her because let's say..... she has issues and is fond of twisting and playing games. Son the same age as mine and always a competition with her. However I don't see why she invites my 3 brothers and families and mum and dad the only 2 nights of the year I couldn't make it.

No idea how many people are involved but sounds like you have at least 4 siblings so chances are it would be next to impossible to find a date during Easter hols when all siblings and grandchildren are free

Yes it's annoying but diary clashes always are when it means you miss out on something but you can't expect no one to every make any plans because you are away for a week

Surely you're better off out of it based on your description of your sister?

It doesn’t even sound like you like your sister so why would you be bothered about going away with her?!

It’s Easter weekend, 4 day weekend so a logical time to have a family get together. If your ds would like a day with his cousins why don’t you arrange one?

Could it just be because it’s the only four day weekend in the year?

So based on your update, why would you even want to be part of this trip?!

No they're not BU, but if you want a trip away with all the family - arrange one.

Yes, YABU.
It is always going to be a nightmare trying to arrange a weekend when 6 different households are all available.
A BH weekend seems like quite a good shout.

Shame you can't be here, but, of course if you arrange the next one, you can make sure it is a weekend you can do.

Although it doesn't sound as if you like her anyway, so nit sure why you would be aggrieved.

Yes, YABU but I also think from your update that you are right about it being done on purpose. You don’t sound as though you get on so perhaps that feeling is reciprocated and that’s why it’s been arranged for when you have plans.

Why have you never arranged anything with your family? You could invite them if you want a big family day out.

You obviously don’t like your sister, maybe it’s mutual and that’s why she has done it. Your family don’t need to get in the middle. They’re available and they’ve said yes. I’m sure they’ll do the same for you if you arrange something.

She's trying to sabotage your trip to London isn't she? Is she always jealous of you? I think you should go to London and have a fantastic time. She will try to tell you that they have had the best time they all had to go with her and you haven't so I think you will have the best time!