Am I doing enough?

[Strawberry06]

My baby boy is 3 1/2 weeks old and despite the odd crying outburst is generally a good baby, sleeps a lot during the night etc

But it's occurred to me that all he does is eat and sleep.

We've been out for walks so he's been getting fresh air/sunlight

We've got a playmat/baby gym for him but I was told he's too young for that at the moment? When should they start tummy time?

I was planning to go to baby sensory/massage but wanted to wait until he had his first jabs? Or should I be going now?

DH read to him in the womb but so far we haven't read to him but I do sing to him.

Just feel a bit overwhelmed I should be doing more?! FTM if you can't tell!

Yes that's all they do at that age.

Totally normal. They don’t need anything apart from milk, sleep, nappy changes and cuddles. No need for a playmat for a good few weeks yet. They can actually get overstimulated if you try to do too much with them when they are tiny. You can try something like black and white pictures if you want.

For baby groups and classes only go if you want to eg to meet other Mums. The baby won’t get much out of them until 6 months or even later. They only need you (and their Dad) when they are small.

There's plenty of time for all that. Enjoy the snuggles and long naps!

Don't worry about not doing enough at this age, they really don't do much and it's totally normal for them to just sleep, eat and need their nappy changing. I started baby sensory with my little girl when she was 2 months old.

Enjoy the cuddles 🥰
We started classes at about 8 weeks. One thing I loved doing before then was going to cafes/pub etc as they just chill in their pram or on you. Now (my LO is nearly 9 months) there’s no chill 😂

Your baby sounds completely normal. Babies of that age have their milk, sleep (a lot), wee and poo. That's it. He's too young for anything else just yet.

It sounds like a very traumatic time for you. That's definitely alot to take in in such a short time. Has he been to see the kids? I would be inclined to tell him still even if you make the decision not to keep it. It's not fair that you take all the care for your son on, your ex needs to step up

At 3 weeks they can barely see to their end of their nose!

Give it a few more weeks and they will be more awake alert and interested in the next few weeks. Around 5 weeks my daughter started to engage with the world. I was very depressed by this point and struggled with classes and expressed this concern with my HV and she reassured me that babies find their feet fascinating and every thing is completely new and interesting for them. My daughter favourite thing to do was to stare at the blue line on the internet router. The washing machine was a favourite too!

Sorry this ended up on the wrong thread. Not sure how that happened lol and can't see how to delete

No need to do anything bar cuddle, feed, chat to him, and take him for walks at this age. I started going to baby groups and using play mats at 2-3 months.

So in summary yes you are doing enough!

Definitely read to him if you can. I found it built a great habit of us always reading to DD and she loves reading now. Her vocabulary is excellent too :)

Edit to add: I think she benefited from us talking, rather than books specifically, but it makes you speak for an extended period just to the baby and she seemed to love it from a very young age.

I think officially you should be doing tummy time because it's supposed to stop them getting a flat head and build neck muscles. DD HATED being plonked on her stomach, but I later learned that being held upright on your shoulder counts too, so perhaps you're already doing it?

They can use the play mats wherever but might be best when they have a bit more interest in the world and enjoy bashing their arms and legs about into things :)

Sounds like you're doing great anyway! 🙂

At 3 weeks old, absolutely anything they can see is educational. They are learning how to focus at different distances and how to track a moving object. Black and white/stark lines/high contrast is easiest for them - many love to stare at window blinds while moving their head slightly.

Honestly, EVERYTHING stimulates a baby at this age!

It's good to start tummy time early, as they are more likely to complain about it later if you don't. As @PlantDoctor says, it doesnt have to be plonking them face down on a mat - that tends to make them cross as they don't have the strength to do much. When they are awake, give them plenty of time held upright against your shoulder so they can lift/turn their head. Doing tummy time on your lap can also be good.

Reading is not really necessary, but it's it's good habit to get into and certainly does no harm. Books with very simple pictures are usually more popular with the tiny crowd (thinking more 3 months than 3 weeks, admittedly, it's hard to get an opinion from one at 3 weeks!). You can get (or print)stark black and white baby sensory ones. Once they are a bit bigger "that's not my" are good simple pictures. Save the Julia Donaldson etc for when they are 12 months+ and the rhyming helps with language aquisition.

Singing is something you can introduce early. Nursery rhymes are simple and move in single note steps often.

Seriously don't overthink this stuff though. Cuddles are by far the most important thing for your babies brain right now.

I started classes at 5 weeks which was bat shit! I think because it was the tail end of covid and I was worried we'd have another winter lockdown so wanted to get out and about. Total waste of time until 6 months.

Now I know what toddlers are like next time I will just chill out! But I will go to baby cinema and drink coffee for me.

Enjoy it while it lasts! Soon they will be demanding entertainment all day long so while they are happy to eat and sleep, let them! Sing to them and chat to them about what you’re doing and go walks. You should like your doing plenty. I also wouldn’t be doing classes unless you actually want to do it for yourself, the baby will get nothing from it, if you think you will enjoy getting out the house and the social element then go for it.

Completely normal! You sound like you are doing great.

I took my baby to classes at 6 weeks but in hindsight it was too early, and it wasn’t till about 12 weeks that I started noticing she was actually alert/aware of activities.
You’ll start to notice when they are more awake and alert, and ready for play!