Palilalia Autism?

[Emmabmumof3]

Hi I’m just looking for advice about my 4year old daughter. She whispers to herself every night before bed. She can’t seem to settle or stop fidgeting and now has started to whisper to herself. Anyone had anything similar? Thank you

One of my kids scripts to himself relentlessly but it's only one feature of his autism.

I used to do that as a kid.

I’m going to mention some other things in case any of the rest of them ring a bell.

Eventually, it was a constant running commentary “I’m running along now, I’m going on the swings now”.

At the time I was very, very energetic and also had a lot of wakefulness. My parents saw the doctor about my wakefulness after a time when I was about eighteen months old and I didn’t sleep for two or three days. It wasn’t
uncommon for me but they were exhausted.

The doctor said I was fine, they should just let me play quietly so they put toys in my cot so I could be a safe contained environment but still have some interactive stimulation whilst they were sleeping. They also gave me a nightlight (well in the seventies it was leaving the hall light on and leaving the door ajar) so I could see what I was doing to an extent and not get scared in the dark.

The running commentary went away when I learned to read, at about age two/three. A health visitor told me my mum she wouldn’t get any peace until I was reading so as she was an English teacher she taught me how to read. I became much less active.

What happened was the external commentary it became an internal commentary because learning to read in my head rather than out loud helped me bring the thoughts inside.

I was a voracious reader as a child/teen, partly as a way of switching out of my own thoughts and partly as a way of seeing the world from the perspective of others. I particularly enjoyed (and still do enjoy) books with internal narration. I also used to read a lot at night if I couldn’t sleep, again with the lights off but the hall light on.

I’m still largely a verbal processor, meaning I do better making sense of things and coming to decisions by talking them through, although I can do it via an internal process it just takes longer and can be more stressful.

Diagnosed with autism and adhd in my mid forties and working towards a diagnosis of a sleep disorder, possibly delayed phase sleep disorder or non-24 hour circadian rhythm.

To be honest whilst I did and do love reading, I often wish they’d just let me be a bit more hyperactive and talkative for longer rather than hyperlexic, as I think I would have delivered habits more suited to me.

@EcstaticMarmalade thank you for your reply. Lots of what you’ve said about you as a child is similar to my daughter. She too loves to read now that she can although she still hasn’t mastered the reading in her head. She says she just doesn’t understand how
to. I also massively appreciate your honesty regarding just maybe letting her be instead of trying to make her keep her thoughts inside. I will definitely be taking this on board and trying to
understand things from her perspective more. X

@Emmabmumof3

Really happy to hear from you and glad to hear that what I said helped.

As you’ve mentioned not forcing internalisation, I’ll mention something that occurred to me a while after I posted.

I do wish my parents had let me be a little more. And I got to thinking after posting about what maybe would have helped me.

I think, in time, and at the right age, some guidance about who it is safe to give access to your thoughts with would have helped me.

I grew up thinking it wasn’t safe or appropriate to talk about what I was thinking/feeling at all to anyone, that I had to internalize everything so it led me to bottle things up.

And when as a teenager and in my twenties I did move beyond that,I had such a hunger to speak about things and I didn’t have enough skills to be discerning about who I opened up to.

So more about who you can trust (signs that people are trustworthy or not, trust builds over time based on people’s actions).

And some guidance a sort of “horses for courses” nature, just about what it is safe to share with who.

Also, and again at an older age, how to generally say things kindly but also maintain good boundaries. I was definitely taught that other people’s comfort was more important than my safety.

Really wish all the best for both you and your little girl.