Independent tooth- brushing 2yo

[MotherOfShihTzus]

We have a fiercely independent almost-2yo; he brushes his teeth to a 2 minute tooth brushing song, twice a day, which he's happy to do. I believe he is pretty good, though chewing down on the brush is a favoured technique. I've been reading up know we should also be brushing his teeth to ensure it's done properly, but he is so wilful, so strong, and to get him to do anything he doesn't want to is near impossible.

Any advice on getting him to allow us to also brush his teeth? He currently has molars coming which doesn't help in his receptiveness!

At one point I had a rule with my now three year old that if she was good while I did it, she got to do it herself afterwards. Might be worth a try if he can understand that?

Now the three year old will do it herself and then come to me to do any bits she's missed (so I basically do it again after she's done it). But I suspect two would be too young to do it that way round.

He does it then you 'check' for bits he missed ie. Brush them again!

We played dentists, made a game where the dentist (me or daddy) guess what they have had to eat today while brushing their teeth. Sounds daft but DD loved it. Eg “I think I can see broccoli” and DD had to lie back on our lap in the dentist chair.

We let her brush too but we always did it too. It was non negotiable even if it involved a screaming fit. They aren’t good enough themselves.

We hunt for animals hiding in their mouths – although this morning DD4 claimed there was a tiny version of me hiding in her mouth that I had to brush out!

We had a star chart for teeth brushing. She got to pick the colour crayon and for a good teeth brushing she could a special star she could colour in.
For us us brushing her teeth and a good teeth brush is one of our hardlines and she never brushes her own teeth. She is independent but this is one thing that has to be done properly. She has reflux and the acid is damaging her teeth. Her dentist was very pleased we didn't let her brush her own teeth and said it was very important not to let her.
She does mouth wash and then has extra toothpaste put on her molars before bed and she just accepts this is what we do.
She gets to pick the timer video and she's now 3.5 and started with a little bit of pocket money and good teeth cleans are part of what she has to do to get the pocket money

Sounds absolutely disgusting 🤮🤢🤢

He is 2, don't create a monster by giving him free reign. He needs to learn when to listen.

Thanks all - super helpful advice.

My concern is that he's a little young to play along with the games / understand - though of course we will try and keep reinforcing. And also - that if we are insisting on doing something which he fights, the screaming meltdown is not conducive to a relaxed bedtime. He sleeps well, eats well - but his wilfulness is becoming an issue I think. i.e. he won't stay still for a nappy change unless he has a distraction such as a video on the phone 😩 which I know is awful but it's the only thing that's worked (he's so physical and strong he becomes a danger to himself as we can't have him fighting his way off the changing table). I'm just so conscious of, as it's been said above, creating a monster. He is lovely and sweet but also extremely wilful! I've been kidding myself that it's a phase which will pass but know we need to get on top of it ASAP.

We do similar to @AlltheFs. DC lies down and we do it first then they have a go. It's non-negotiable for us that it's done properly (I'm more scared of the issues we'd have with cavities)
Dentist also told us we need to be doing it until they're 7(!!)

@MotherOfShihTzus is just do whatever works to get it done tbh. If it's screen time for 2mins it would be a worthwhile trade off for the meltdown