“It’s not up to the school to decide”

[TuliLily]

I see it said on here often that it’s not up to the school to decide what age a child can travel to and from school alone but has anyone actually challenged this? Has anyone told the school that they won’t be following the rule? Surely the school just wont let them out? But it’s always said on here that it’s the parent’s decision not the schools. My children’s school doesn’t allow it till year 6 and I’m asking because the school have now said my 12 year old isn’t allowed to collect his siblings anymore which he’s done for a long time and bring them out whilst I am literally stood outside. (I have an autistic child who doesn’t like coming into the playground because of the noise and crowds it’s never been an issue till now) don’t want to focus on my personal situation just more if anyone has actually ever challenged the schools rules as when posters on mumsnet say their school doesn’t allow kids to leave till a certain age it’s always met with “it’s not up to the school!”

@TuliLily its true it is not up to the school but it’s one of those which might not be worth the argument.

@ByRoseLeader - why not start your own thread in Further Education, rather than hijacking @TuliLily‘s thread?

You need to start a new thread of your own

My children's school did not allow it until year 6.

They cycled in on together as a pair from year 4. School didn't say anything about that - not sure they noticed. They had a brick mobile and rang me every day when they got in to start with.

School got a bit arsey about them cycling home without an adult (but together). They said they would be happy with a letter saying I took full responsibility so I wrote one.

Head teacher refused me putting dd down for collecting younger db... Stood and watched her 5 nights let another pupil same year as dd collect her db... Weird...

This is my first post, I didn’t know I hijacked anything I thought it was a new thread.

How do I delete?
it’s my first post

I’ve not been challenged on it although if I were I would take them up on it.

Our school just asked me to email in giving permission for my Y4 daughter to walk home on her own, although I think I brought that on myself by ringing them about it, as now my DS is in Y4 I’ve realised nobody has a clue whether he’s collected or not - he’s released from class & has two possible exit routes from there with nobody monitoring which exit he takes or whether an adult is there for him.

I’ve reported my post cause I can’t delete it. Mistakes happen (1st post) glad to see we’re all a friendly bunch and not at all judgemental

I think it's unusual for a school to say no older children can collect but perhaps there's been an incident or new safeguarding advice that they are adhering to? Was this a general message to all parents OP or just to you?

No it was only said to him. The school doesn’t allow children under 14 to collect siblings, so they allowed it for us as they know what my daughter is like as she use to attend the school and she was always allowed to finish early due to avoiding the playground after school the school have always been fine with it but I should have mentioned a new head teacher started in December so I can only imagine it’s her that has had the issue with it.

I had my daughter's school tell me they wouldn't let her leave so I got legal advice. I was told it could be considered to be unlawful detention and I could sue them. The school backed down.

At my children’s school they don’t let the child go till they see an adult collecting them

I got so much derision for saying this on a thread once so I’m glad someone has confirmed this is the case!

I spoke with two schools for my children and both backed down right away. One asked me not to tell other parents so it didn’t become common knowledge that their policy wasn’t enforceable.

Working in schools for 20ish years I saw numerous parents challenge it. Twice the school stuck to their guns and contacted social services. Once they got a bollock for wasting SS time. The other time they were correct to object, and it was part of a wider picture.

It is not their choice. It’s just easier for schools if they can keep a set way for all of the kids.

I work in a school and children can become walkers in year 3. We also allow older siblings to be added to younger siblings dismissal lists so that they can be collected by older sibling/s.
Parents have to sign a dismissal form stating if they can be walkers or not.

Some schools do have policies for collection at end of the day, some insist on collection by adult or sibling age 16 or over. The policies have to be updated every couple of years so I would assume that the new HT has reviewed this policy and wants to make sure it is followed by everyone. It's a shame for you but shows the new HT is treating safeguarding as a priority which can only be a good thing.

@Sunshineismyfavourite the school policy does not supersede parental decisions. I think that’s what often causes confusion on these threads.

I wouldn’t argue it myself but legally the school cannot refuse to release a child the parents have indicated they are happy to be released.

If you want your 12 year old to be able to collect because your autistic child gets distressed in the playground then that sounds like their policy on pick up needs reasonable adjustments because of your disabled DC.

Hi
I’m an assistant headteacher in a secondary school so slightly different as we obviously allow all children to leave on their own.

the issue will be around the school’s liability in keeping your children safe. Let’s say for example they felt a child wasn’t of an age to appropriately safeguard their siblings and they didn’t challenge it, if the worse happened the school would find themselves in a potential safeguarding investigation. As others have said this could be negated by you putting in writing that it is your wishes. If the school had genuine safeguarding concerns about this they could refer to the local authority for advice.

welcome to MN 🙄

Welcome to MN.

I’m happy for the school to bring them out to me instead but something tells me they won’t want to do that. This is what use to happen when she was in the school.

I can see them the whole time they are in the playground he is just bringing them out to me not bringing them home. So I would understand if I was expecting him to bring them home. Could they stop me from collecting them early then as that’s what use to happen I use to collect them at 3 to avoid the issue. (School finishes at 3.20)