Our daughter has just turned 8 and we’re having some issues with her behaviour and friendship group.
We’re working on it and her school have been wonderful helping. She has a really small (13) class so there is no getting away from classmates.
She’s always been sassy but these last few months have been a challenge with the answering back and attitude however she’s done amazing with the plan the teacher pulled together for school (after I reached out to the teacher) and how we’re reacting to her.
The issues we can’t agree on is her friendship group. She has 2 main friends since starting school (3 years) and one (who we’ll called Claire) it’s always been up and down. They’d clash and then mellow out and clash again. From brief conversations with the other girls (Sarah) mum they’ve had some issues (not sure to the same extent) with the same girl.
My daughter and Sarah are sweet friends and get on really well together. There was some issues awhile ago when my daughter was being left out and Sarah’s mum has said sarah told her if she didn’t do what Claire wanted she was mean to her.
But now Sarah and my daughter seem to be pairing up more and not always including Claire.
My husband is of the opinion we should teach her to always be kind and include everyone and if there is any drama she should walk away and find other people to play with.
While I agree that we should always do our best to be kind and inclusive I also think at some point we need to teach her she doesn’t have to put up with people that make her miserable and cause drama whenever they’re together and it’s ok not to be everyone’s friends.
He strongly disagrees and thinks it’s completely the wrong message to teach her while I think his way is teaching her to be a people pleaser and not have any boundaries.
We both think we’re right and I need advice/peoples options/experiences to try to do the best for our daughter.
Stressed mum who just wants to do the right thing for my daughter and help her down the right path.