Leaving 4 month old baby

[Erlouise]

Hey ladies
I know I sound very possessive and overbearing but I have to leave my little girl this weekend with my parents for one evening. I have a birthday dinner and drinks and hen night all rolled into one..
baby is only 4 months old. I haven’t left her for even so much as an hour (even then it’s only been one or twice to do the food shop or something) since she was born so I do feel really nervous.
my parents have said that they’ll work out what she wants if she’s getting upset and they’re coming to my house to make sure she stays in her nighttime routine.
I’ve only ever put her to bed before so I’m really worried about how she’s going to react as well.
I really don’t want to go but I can’t avoid it as it’s for my SİL and I’ve let her down loads in the past.

am I awful for leaving her to go out?
will she be ok?
am I over thinking?
help…

I can understand your anxiety of course, but trust your parents. They raised you as a baby.

Relax a bit and enjoy your weekend out.

I wouldn’t have been able to leave my 4 month old for an evening and night at that age but physically couldn’t because of breastfeeding (and tbh was a good excuse!).
it’s definitely not awful to leave her…if you want to. But if you don’t that’s totally valid too as she’s still very young. Could you say you can just come for the dinner then head home? (And to make you feel better, I’m going away next weekend and feel slightly nervous about leaving my DD with DH to put her bed as it’s always been me that puts her to bed… and she’s just turned 2 😆

Is it overnight? I think at 4 months old they’re so sleepy anyway I’m sure your parents will cope.

I’ve always done bedtime routine with my 2 yr old and he won’t let anyone else put him down (except for dad). So whenever we go out we’ll always go after bedtime. Could you be a bit late and try to do bedtime yourself?

Just do dinner and drinks. You have the perfect excuse to avoid the Hen do!

I’m sure she won’t even know you’re not there

It’s not overnight just dinner and drinks! So it’s from 6pm-12am, so I’ll be missing the bedtime routine but I suppose I could turn up a bit late!
I probably am over thinking it

I bet your parents are super excited to have your DD overnight. It is perfectly acceptable and normal to leave your child with your trusted parents for a few hours or overnight. You will have to leave your DD with some form of childcare at some point (nursery, school, work etc etc) so it's just a first little step for you really OP. Try to think of all the positives of doing this. Your DD will be able to bond with her Grandparents who can form such a valuable relationship with their Grandchildren, they will also have a lovely time with her and you get to have a bit of time to yourself for you. I hope you are able to enjoy your night out without worrying or stressing too much.

I’d do bedtime and leave when she’s down. It’s what we’ve always done and it’s just easier for everyone. I know my DS would NEVER go down for someone else and would scream the place down until I came back! I had a babysitter call me telling me he wouldn’t settle and was really upset once!

ETA: I see what PP is saying but there’s a big difference between daytime and nighttime. To my DS anyway!

is the father around? Surely he would do the bedtime routine and look after her?

Maybe my babies have been different but at 4 months they didn’t really have a bedtime and were downstairs with us/snoozing on us etc. Then once I’d put them down it was still a case of who knows when they’d wake up (usually after not that long!) but sounds like yours might have a bit more of a routine/ steady sleep pattern so if you want to do it then go for it!

We left our 4 month old baby with my parents for the evening to celebrate our wedding anniversary.

The change of routine obviously was a benefit as she slept through the night for the first time ever! What's more she continued to do so.

Just have your phone on you and if nothing else you will benefit from a break.

Our baby is 4 and a half months now. We’ve left her with my parents a couple of times to go out with friends. It was absolutely fine and I think they’ve quite enjoyed spending time with her. We haven’t left her overnight yet but that’s only because we’ve had no reason to really - I’d have no issue doing so with close family.
Honestly, I’m sure it’ll be fine. I hope you enjoy your evening and make the most of your time off, I’m sure you deserve it! 🙂