Combi feeding from birth. Any success stories?

[TheBirdintheCave]

I’m looking for some success stories regarding combi feeding from birth if anyone has any?

To start with a bit of backstory, I’m autistic (which often comes with a lot of sensory difficulties) and have extremely sensitive nipples to the point where even my husband is not allowed to touch them.

When I got pregnant I decided I wanted to breastfeed so I gave it a go when my son was born but the pain of him latching was SO bad it left me screaming. I’m not exaggerating when I say it was worse than labour for me. It felt like a vice was being clamped onto my nipple. He had no problems with tongue tie or anything so it didn’t seem to be an issue with him at all. It was all me.

Son was subsequently bottle fed and I felt (and still do to some point) like a massive failure as my body wouldn’t let me do what I wanted it to do. I cried a lot when my milk came in on day four and I couldn’t do anything with it.

I’m now pregnant with our second (and last) and would like to try breastfeeding again, perhaps with a nipple shield this time?

I’ve been looking into combi feeding (me breastfeeding and husband formula feeding) as taking turns with my husband to bottle feed whilst the other slept was so good for my mental health (I ended up with PND with my son) BUT all of the advice regarding combi feeding suggests that I’d first have to exclusively breast feed for six(!) weeks before starting it to build up a supply. I don’t think that’s something I’d be able to survive as I would go insane from lack of sleep. Could I try and breastfeed more during the day to help build supply instead and just do alternating bottle/breast at night?

I think I just need some reassurance that it’s possible to combi feed from birth and I don’t have to abandon my goal of being able to breast feed. Even if it’s just for a few months. My husband is supportive of me trying again though I think he’s a little worried for me if it all goes wrong again.

The bottles we will be using again are the Minbie brand which have paced feeding teats with a shape designed to mimic breast feeding.

I did it for 6 months. DS was in NICU and tube fed for the first few days. I started bf on day 3, but had to top up with formula. I swapped to swapping a night feed of formula after a couple of weeks which DH gave.

We did because from like day 4 as we were readmitted due to weight loss so I’d breastfeed and then we’d top up with bottles but some nights DH would just give a bigger bottle- we had no real set schedule! We called it our combi feeding mash up but baby was never hungry and began to tjrive and put weight on pretty quickly

I was told to either feed or pump between 12am and 5am to keep my supply up so I’d try to at least do a feed around midnight and the early morning!

If we have a another one we’d probably combi feed again from the start and save all the anxiety this time round!

I combi fed for 8 weeks from birth then gave up as breast feeding was just too hard for me. I felt so drained by it and milk supply wasn't great.

I didn't feel like a failure though. I did what I could and that was that. I was never going to martyr myself for it as I wanted to look after my mental health as well.

Do what you can and if it doesn't work and you bottle feed that's not failure.

My ds was born at a very low birth weight so I was actively encouraged to combi-feed to minimise baby losing too much weight after birth. I would breastfeed for 15mins and then 'top-up' with formula after breastfeeding. As ds got bigger, I increased the length of time breastfeeding until after about 2 months I pretty much dropped the formula, apart from a bottle at night.

It worked really well for me and did mean my dh could help with feeding from time to time. Just make sure you are aware of the risks that your supply may not be established by combining- feeding.

@JollyHostess101 I wanted to combi feed my second as it worked so well with the first but she totally refused bottles and formula. I had to bf for 15 months!

Can you get to see a lactation specialist to discuss your previous issues now? It may help to explore options with a genuine expert. (Which I am not.)

Did you try pumping last time? From what you describe, I wonder if pumping and bottle feeding might work best for you?

I've combined formula with breastfeeding for over a year due to low supply - but I had lots of help from a lactation consultant available through a local charity on how to make it work for me. Triple feeding is utterly exhausting, and I still never git close to a full milk supply!

I combi-fed 2nd from birth, no supply issues, but by about 4wks she began to develop a bottle aversion, so had to exclusively breastfeed- if i hadn't done that option would have had to exclusively bottle feed from then to stop the aversion I think.You are not a failure if you end up stopping....everyone is different and you've clearly tried really hard to give it a go.

To be honest I probably didn't do enough regular bottle feeds though....I know another mum who did set bottle feeds like clockwork each day and breastfed alongside that too for 18mths and her baby never developed a bottle aversion and she was able to share night feeds and freely go out and about in the evenings as she pleased (lucky her! Haha)

As for the nipple pain in those early days, can totally relate, it's so painful them latching on then isn't it...would recommend wileda nipple cream.
Does it ease off after the start of a feed?

I combi-fed both my DC. First was out of necessity; my milk was delayed coming in plus tongue tie & silent reflux. We started with my breastfeeding as much as possible & ffing with a syringe. Then moved to a bottle when bigger.
Worked well for us - both DC got fed, got breast milk, DH & others could feed DC when needed, we could share night feeds too.
Combi-feeding definitely helped prolong bfing for us too.

OP I haven’t combi fed, but just wanted to highlight how different each baby can be. Some feed and sleep well and others don’t. Speaking to a lactation consultant with experience of autism/sensory stuff is a great shout to understand techniques to support you (Lucy Ruddle or Lucy Webster, can’t remember which, is neurodiverse herself). There’s also a book called Mixed Up about combi feeding. Hopefully these might give you some tools should you need them, but you might find that this baby is a different experience to your first ❤️

It didn’t work for me. Baby just decided they preferred bottles, and my supply dried up as I wasn’t feeding enough. The second time I gave no bottles of formula and bf worked brilliantly.

however if I were you now I’d make my peace with bottle feeding. There’s nothing wrong with it, and if you physically hate the sensation then don’t put yourself through it. Once you’ve done that, give breastfeeding a proper try. If it doesn’t work, try combi feeding. If that doesn’t work, you’re bottle feeding and nothing lost from trying.

Hi OP, my baby is almost 5 months old and I've combi fed her from birth and still going strong. I haven't encountered any issues combi feeding. I heard a lot about baby's refusing bottles because of the boob or vice versa. But I haven't had a problem. I'd do it again!

We had a tiny baby and I’d wished someone had suggested this from the start!

Ds was born 36.4 and only 6lbs with jaundice. We were kept in for the first week and midwives had been on a feeding schedule through the night where every 2/3 hours I would bf for 20 mins and then 'top-up' with ready made bottle

I did, but mainly breastfeeding with only 1 or 2 bottles a day.

I also found breastfeeding extremely painful for the first 10 days but then it got better. I think sometimes at the beginning the baby’s mouth is just so small that they can’t get enough nipple in it to make it comfortable, until they grow a bit.

@TheBirdintheCave firstly massive congratulations, I remember you from various TTC & other threads.

We combi feed DS, he's 9 weeks, and we've been combi feeding as long as I can remember, I couldn't tell you when we started but it's definitely been longer than the last 3 weeks, he usually only gets his midnight/1pm feed as formula, and he's sleeping until around 6am, it works well for us, I go to bed around 10pm, sometimes I'll go back to bed after the morning feed too depending how tired I am!

Combi fed for 10 months was absolutely fine. Did roughly 60% breastfeeding 40% pumped milk/formula. My biggest advice is don't wait to introduce a bottle. You'll be told it will stop them wanting to breastfeed but from my experience one a day from birth was fine until breastfeeding established. I waited with my eldest and she never took a bottle and it was very stressful!

I'd recommend the MAM bottles btw.

Thank you for all of the stories and advice everyone :) Seems like it might actually be possible if we introduce the bottle a day or so after birth. I was a bit nervous posting this as I know breast feeding can be quite a combative topic on MN!

@Potatomashed Thanks for the recommendation. Lucy Ruddle seems to be the ND person so I will message her.

@Matildahoney Thank you :D It took 22 months, a round of IVF and three miscarriages in the end but we got there and I'm 29 weeks now :)

@DuploTrain How did you cope with the pain of it? I lasted about five seconds both times I tried with my son even with biting my arm.

@Yogatoga1 There's no way I could do it full time. I read stories about people basically being up all night with cluster feeding for days on end. Also, I don't get any sensation other than extreme pain. If it just felt weird that would be fine 😅

I combined fed from day one with my second born, no issues.
I tried it with my first but he didn’t like the bottle and preferred boob; I would say that his latch was really bad. The person at the hospital said it was all fine and no tongue tie so I carried on bf in terrible pain for two months, before I paid for a private consultation who said he had tongue tie and latch issues. Once this was sorted no more pain. Feeding the second born I’ve had no pain at all. So unless you had tongue tie/latch checked again after the initial hospitalnstay I wouldn’t be totally reliant on what the hospital staff said about it as they don’t always have great training on bf!

@SRK16 I did wonder about my son for a while afterwards but he's three now and has a very long and definitely unattached tongue which he enjoys sticking out 😂It could have been a latch thing perhaps. I was just so scared after the first two times I didn't want him near my boobs ever again so didn't even consider trying to get help. It was also lockdown at the time.

The key thing is whether breastfed, formula or combi, do what is right for you. There is far too much pressure on women to breastfeed and no-one should feel like they failed because they either gave it a go and were not able to do it, or just decided it wasn't for them. Do what is right for you and your baby.

And congratulations 🥳

@TheBirdintheCave that's amazing news, I'm so pleased for you! I think you miscarried around the same time I lost my first whichI think is why I remember you. There are so many bf clinics out there which shows you how difficult it can be, and so many reasons why people struggle. DS doesn't latch well, we're waiting on a TT referral 🙄 HV referred us on 2nd Feb & nothing yet, but he does have a high palette which can make it harder too.
Good luck with it.

@Matildahoney Thank you and congratulations to you too! :D