Does anyone else not let their toddler watch any TV?

[AlbertaWildRose]

DS is 21 months. DH and I have chosen to not let him watch any television at all until he's older; we never, ever have the TV on while he's awake and he doesn't even know what it is. In speaking with friends I'm really feeling like I'm in the minority, so I'm wondering if anyone else does this? I am not trying to say that this is a better approach, just what we have chosen to do.

I wanted to do this but DH undermines me when he gets up with the kids (age 27 and 10 months) by turning the TV on.It drives me insane.I let them watch In the night garden as part of their bed time routine as the older one is very lively and it provides a nice bridge between her running around like a loon and settling down for her books and bedtime..After that though tis at least 3 books which boith seem to prefer anyway.
I was very hard line on it but have decided to some degree its a losing battle.Whenever we go round to friends houses their kids are watching TV or DVD's and this combined with DH's sabotage inevitably mean my older one asks sometimes for TV on..and when I desperately need to do something I do relent..Plus I cant claim I dont watch TV at all and it hasnt done me any harm.
But am aware its a slippery slope!

My SIL has TV on ALL THE TIME, however-mealtimes, the lot..I hate that!

DS is only 18 months but I do have the TV on sometimes, not all the time maybe 15mins to check the weather and travel in the morning and then an hour from 5-6 (between tea and bedtime), the 5-6 slot is for me, as I just feel I need something on then to distract me. Sometimes we will watch in the nightgarden or balamory or something for 20 minutes in the day if DS is cranky, if he is ill this goes up! He has started to ask for the TV on and trying to put the DVD on himself which worries me a bit, but not that much!

I watched loads of tv as a kid, apparently it was on constantly. Mum reckons that I learnt to read watching sesame street.

We didn't have the tv on at all until DS was two and a half. Now I let him have CBeebies on in the afternoon for a bit when he's tired and needs to chill out. Personally I think it's great. No adverts + mostly the programmes are pretty good. Can't see the harm myself and actually think he gets a lot from it. Admittedly when he first 'discovered tv' we had a bit of stress as he screetched when we switched it off, but now he's mostly ok, so long as I warn him in advance that it's going off soon. Also, I can't say I've noticed him playing less by himself because of it. If anything it fires his imagination a bit, expanding his ideas by what he's watched. Bit long this, but basically why not if it's in moderation and you make sure it's good programmes..?

My girls watched very little until they were 2. Now they no longer sleep during the day I find that carefully filtered watching of ceebeebies is no bad thing. They curl up and doze and watch programmes I consider to be gently educating them - learning about colours/shapes/concepts/recycling. It also gives me a break before the afternoon and after the morning both of which often involve going out and doing things with them.

My parents massively restricted our TV watching as kids and we grew resentful, watching loads whenever we had the chance - like a child deprived of sweets would gorge themselves. Actually they very much limited our sweet intake too and we did stuff ourselves with chocolate whenever we got the chance!

I did read loads and still do, but found when I went to read English at uni that most of my peers had also read loads as children as well as watching tv a fair amount. It makes me laugh with the sweet rationing as well, as two of my brothers have mouthfuls of fillings despite eating limited sugar!

I don't think it's a bad thing to not let your child watch tv. I imagine as they get a little older they will be more keen to as they see it at other people's houses and learn the art of pester power. Under 2-2.5 my children were never massively interested in it either as they didn't really understand the programmes.

hatty - lol at the fillings. I think that was more to do with dentists making money than anything else. We didn't have many sweets either, no juices only water between meals etc and were really careful brushing our teeth from a young age (my dad still have a full set, ok condition at aged 67). And I have lots of nasty looking black fillings. I have no idea how it could possibly have been rotten teeth.

I agree with you - everything in moderation is good for you, and in fact teaches children about moderation for later life (e.g. food, alcohol, sex etc)

We don't have a TV, though DS does watch some stuff on the computer (good for gettin ghim out of a screaming fit ) and watches it if it's on at someone else's house. Have come back from a few days at MIL's when telly was on a lot and noticed that a) DS transfixed for a few mins then tends to trot away) and b) it was a LOT more stimulation than normal - telly plus conversation - and he got rather grumpy as a result. Am not anti-tv, but if we did have one I'd restrict the times it was on.

I wouldn't stress too much about it either way: decide how you want them to turn out and behave accordingly. Do you follow all the current trends or pick and choose a bit?

None of my 3 watched much TV and still don't: we only got video when the eldest was 4. We still have a "rule" that no tv/ dvd until after dinner. When they were very small they were put in high chair/ at table with crayons/ paper and assorted tapes/ CDs playing while I was making dinner. The result is that I have 3 DCs (8, 9 & 11) who are fantastic friends with each other, will entertain themselves and are brilliant readers. The other side of this though is that none of them is part of the "main gang" in school so while they do have friends, they're not into all the latest crazes and laugh at ads... eg none of them likes High School Musical but if everyone else does, how do you fit in without the same common cultural reference point?

I think it's a bit like being an adult in an office: if you don't watch any of the soaps/ Lost etc, then you have less to talk about with most colleagues... but maybe you would prefer to talk about other things? Chill and believe in yourself and your own values!

I'm certainly not planning on never letting him watch TV at all, but I just think 21 months is way too young, and that TV is unnecessary right now. I realise that there are lots of good programmes on, and I look forward to watching them with him when he's older.

Pofaced, I definitely like your idea of no tv/dvd until after dinner.

Dd (22 months) watched no tv at all ever until a couple of months ago. Now she watches a bit at the weekends with her daddy - usually nature programmes or rugby!

I was a bit iffy about it at first, but have come to think it's quite nice down-time to snuggle on the sofa with dp and watch lions or badgers.

It doesn't occur to her that mummy would even know how to turn it on so she completely ignores it during the week.

we did this with our PFB - we're now on no.3 and it's all gone rapidly downhill along the way (children park in front of Mr Tumble as I type )

i do not have tv for any of my children 2-16 although they do watch dvds

the 5 year old is fantastic and will watch it when i ask if he wants to and turn it off after

I asked him to watch it on good friday and he said no i want to play

the downside is that kids ( boys!) of 5 do a lot of role play of characters etc from tv and we do not know who they are... the upsides are huge imo and i am a mssive advocate of no tv (IME especially for boys)

My ypungest ( 2 last month) never watches it. The downside is illness - he was vety poorly with a sickness bug a couple of weeks back and i had to force him to watch something so i did not have to carry him around . in the end he did watch 'the snowman'

My youngest two are so much easier than my older ones with whom i always had to say 'no'

ds2 was a telly addict and used to ask for it on enetering the house

It is just not in the younger twos mindset and so they are happy to occupy themselves doing other things

I do not have to be conastantly saying no - nor do i feel guilty that they watch it

I think you are doing the right thing/ A LOT of parents on here disagree but i feel quite strongly that no tv has made our home a happier place

my13 yearold recently said to me 'its odd - i really do not miss it'

I am aware as others have said that the older children may rebel against it and i am pretty certain at least a couple will - but that will then be their choice and i am happy with that

people do argue the sweet thing with me - they will go the other way..

personally i think the 0-10 years pass so so quickly their minds have so much more to do than switch off infront of a tv

Paula, thanks for the encouragement. I'm quite confident that I am doing the right thing too, despite what other people say. This is one thing that I feel VERY strongly about.

Didn't have the telly on with ds until he was about 2 and then bedtime hour on cbeebies, he's nearly 5 now and still doesn't watch a lot, although at the weekend dp has the sport on nonstop (ds not interested though thank god). He's really into animals and nature, so we have any animal progs and wildlife documentaries. I think it's great and educational, defo don't let him watch soaps or dramas or even the news really, but some stuff can be really useful and can be very helpful if they're ill/you're ill or whatever. With dd it was more difficult as if ds has it on, what can you do, but again, it's minimal. Don't want to get into the habit of automatically switching it on as soon as he comes into the room, I think it makes them lazy. Also nice to sit as a family and watch a film.

I really admire you for doing this and would if I had the will/support. I gave in when she had chickenpox (16 months) and we were stuck in the house and then ITNG kind of happened... once a week, then twice a week, now probably 3 times.

DD (23 months) is limited to 30min max a day (and that does include Yo Gabba Gabba on youtube and the bizarre Japanese tiger potty training video she can't get enough of...). About once every three weeks we might watch e.g. Nemo/Ratatouille at the weekend but she usually falls asleep/loses interest so rarely gets more than her half hour. GPs give her more if they are looking after her and I am too wet to be really insistent about them not doing so. DH also definitely gives her more than I do but am mindful and have asked him not to put it on if he is on 'morning duty'. Am horrified to admit that she has somehow developed a real attachment to the 'Simsims' - we turn off for the adverts and Itchy and Scratchy!!

When we watch I always talk to her about what's happening so we are very much watching together. Longest she gets watching on her own is the two minutes it takes me to warm up her milk.

She does ask occasionally but she'll also forget about it pretty quickly, i.e. in a week or so.

OH and other thing I meant to say was that I was offloading to Mum about how I felt guilty about letting her watch any TV, and Mum said 'don't - the only reason we ever got a TV was because you were such a nightmare'. Brilliant, I thought, it can't be that bad, I passed all my exams and don't appear to have ADHD... then a friend pointed out that I'm a terrible telly addict and always have been. Like the exemption from responsibility (it's my parents' fault I'm a lazy arse... ) but perhaps the implications for telly watching as an infant aren't too rosy (based on this sample size of one...).

I have let ds watch the odd children's dvd since he was about 15 mths (now 3). He never watches adult tv though. We don't have our cable hooked up (we live in Europe) so tv is not actually an option).

I sit DS 20mths in his high chair to watch fun educational kiddies tv for 30mins in the morning and 30mins at night. He loves it and so do I cause I can chat to you guys or tidy up.

At the weekend we watched the original Wizard of Oz together. It was lovely time with DS, when I was telling him what was happening and he was enjoying the story.

Alberta I think you are right and a 22 month old doesn't need to watch tv.

I don't have a tv so DS has grown up with not having a tv as normal. He watches it as his grandparents now when he visits so doesn't seems to miss out on tv based talk at school. He hasn't asked for a tv. He's 5 now.

We do snuggle up together and watch nice dvds on the computer at the weekends njow that he's older, which is fine as I can choose what is w atched and he doesn't get brainwashed with adverts.

I let my toddler watch IN THE NIGHT GARDEN on Cbeebies. Its the only thing he can watch that I can fall asleep to (while holding his little sister).

But originally, when he was born, I was COMPLETELY against TV for under 5's.

If we have the TV on its not more than 30 mins per day, if at all. If there are animals on it, he points to them and gets excited and we go "oh yes, a giraffe" etc. I don't see that its going to do a great deal of harm.

We have not let him watch TV either but DS is 3 next month so have progressed to a Pocoyo DVD which he loves. He has about half an hour about twice a week. And sometimes DH will do a wildlife programme (David Attenborough etc) at the weekend with him. But no actual TV, and no adverts. I do have the radio on most of the time when we are at home, Radio 4 or 2 so he does lots of singing I'm really glad we did it.